New Spy

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sun Feb 18, 2018 7:26 am

Either the author is getting lost in the growing ocean of imaginary boobs already, or he doesn't even want to commit to his own starting harem. You'll see what I mean. Here's Chapter 8 - Game girls.

Chapter 8 Game girls

As if that title could even begin to matter. Sean will do the girl’s mission, and the author hasn’t introduced any of the 3% of his harem that are actually game characters.

Sean yawned as he got up off the couch of Sam's house since he came by last night to help her with a project and get a little action.

Hey, how come it’s the likely rich Spartan Prince who’s the freeloading couch thief? And what happened with Donna?

"Morning." Sam said dressed in shorts and a sports bra.

Just then the door opened and Sam's eyes widen when her mother walked in.

Are any of these people ever going to use another room in the house, or are you done projecting to us your lack of lock privileges in your own home, author?

"Hello sweetie I...Oh who's this now?" Gabriella said kindly to Sean.

"Oh uh this is Sean he's a foreign exchange student. The girls and I decided he could stay with us since his living arrangements were messed up." Sam said before a small earth quick happened and the fridge nearly fell on Sam had Sean not rushed and held it up just as the earth quick ended.(There are earthquakes in beverly hills right?)

Oh, plenty. Earth quicks? Not so much. I guess those only show up whenever a lazy author needs an immediate excuse to flex his Spartan-sona’s show-off syndrome to his imaginary girlfriend’s mother.

"You ok?" Sean asked.

"Yeah thanks." Sam said as Sean put the fridge back in place.

"Christ I hate earthquakes always so random." Sean said.

"Well you can stay over here as long as you can since you just saved Sam." Gabrielle said hugging her daughter relived she was ok.

How convenient. Now, could someone please ask Sean to move the mysteriously appearing fridge out of the living room and back into the kitchen?

"Just try to keep your acts together I don't want to be a grandmother so soon." Gabriella said making Sean burst out laughing.

Oh, ha ha, deary me, my sides, I’m in stiches, it’s even funnier than the first four times the author couldn’t help going on and on about the topic!!

"That is the same thing Carmen said when she met me." Sean said holding his stomach making the girls laugh. Gabriella couldn't deny this young man was indeed attractive but she was an older woman and her daughter clearly had feelings for him.

This should be worth a laugh. What feelings, author? I’m not even taking a stab at your piss poor detailing here. I’ll tell you the exact range of emotions that’s been depicted in this story so far. Lust. That’s it. You haven’t even made a failed attempt to convince yourself that there’s even affection between anyone in this entire universe.


Sean sighed as the girls forced him to the mall of all places. With them was Donna who while dressed the same had her hair out longer and now was a WHOOP spy made a week ago due to her talents in strength the girls needed when he wasn't around.

Sure, why the fuck not. Why don’t we prepare applications for the entire harem roster while we are at it? Was the punchline of this joke that she instantly grew out her hair, that she’s been around for more than a week while Sean has kept his hands off of her, or that her relevance is somehow whenever Sean isn’t around – which is to say never?!

"Why am I here again?" Sean asked in boredom.

To prolong my suffering as you get sex twenty-four-seven, so would it kill your to indulge the needs of someone else than yourself for once?

"Cause you need new cloths since no offense you little soldier style cloths are getting old." Clover said making steam come out of his ears for that.

Oh, be fair, Clover, it’s the first time we’ve even gotten them described to us.

As they walked Alex stopped when a tv show appeared and Clover bumped into her spilling her drink on her cloths. "Alex!" Clover said in annoyance.

"Sorry cant help myself." Alex said in a daze as she looked at a man on the TV screen making Sean's eyes twitch in annoyance and grabbed her by the ear and pulled her away. "OW OW OW OW OW OW!" Alex cried out in pain and not the pleasurable kind.

Well, he should have pulled her hair like he did during her sex scene, I bet that’s much more pleasurable.

"Seriously what am I a consolation prize?" Sean asked annoyed making Alex giggle sheepishly.

No, more like a participation trophy.

"Sorry I've had a crush on Troy before I met you old habits die hard you know." Alex said and yelped when Clover spanked her when no one was looking. "Don't do that you might get a thrill of getting caught but I don't." Alex said dangerously making Clover giggle.

You mean right up until the author decides you do and then have someone go ‘oh wow, who knew’.

Just then the changing booth sucked them in.

"Seriously is a call to much to ask!" Donna asked in annoyance.

Right, I almost forgot you were here, Donna. Does the author not realize that five people are almost half as covert as three? Jerry is going to have more spies than gadgets on these missions.

"Welcome to our world!" Sam said as they landed in what looked like the laundry room.

"I cant believe we're being WHOOPED during the biggest sale of the year." Clover said in distress.

"Like I actually care OW!" Sean yelled as Clover hit him upside the head.

Can’t you just tell how invested Sean is in his bimbos?

"Hello spies looks like you've shopped till you dropped." Jerry said making a funny while the spies sweat dropped.

"Really?" Donna asked.

Donna, would you stop pretending you are here, the author is trying to transcribe another Totally Spies! episode.

"Oy." Sean said before a video of some athletes appeared to be beamed by something then vanished. "What in the hell?" Sean asked.

Jerry has fiddled with a few After Effects tutorials in his off-time and is proudly presenting the results, I see.

"Recently top athletes from around the world have gone missing and all of them occurred exactly like this however a race car driver somehow wasn't effected like the rest I want all five of you to find out why." Jerry said.

"Great and there a motorcycle racing track there to I call dibs." Sean said.

You couldn’t even bend your ego enough to justify the continued existence of the biker girl Donna for this one, even when you injected your own made up bullshit for no reason, huh, author?

"Now for your transportation you'll be taking KIRTT which stands for Klunky Incognito Radical thought transport it can change into any land vehicle with a simple word command." Jerry said as KIRTT appeared and looked rather lame to Clover.

Is it just that the author suspects the rest of the world to have a photographic memory, or has he never actually read a story with better descriptions in them?

"You have got to be kidding." Clover said.

"Don't worry its in Incognito mode." Jerry said as they entered the car and Clover screamed in fright when Alex using one of the gadgets(I really need to write those down but there so stupid)

Oh, I know you didn’t just dis the spy gadgets, you spandex-craving cretin. Do you even like this show?! You even mention they are here, but can’t be assed to look one up, either. This i like having no spells in Harry Potter, like having no energy moves in Dragon Ball, like having no fusions in Steven Universe, like having no mysteries in Gravity Falls. I’ve seen fanfic examples of all of those, and mocked them, too!!

That turned her into what looked like a dinosaur.

"DON'T DO THAT!" Clover yelled making everyone laugh.


"YEE HAW!" Sean yelled out in excitement as he drove off his customized motorcycle from home on the track.(For his bike look up the first Ghost rider movie bike since that one was so badass that you'd wish you actually have one)

Fuck off. Even in the throes of your own wish-fulfillment, you slack off on actually delivering this fantasy so as to pretend you don’t write for nothing but your own amusement. And now Ghost Rider has more than once been a common denominator in the things I mock. The pattern is starting to worry me.

"Well he's defiantly having fun." Donna said in amusement.

Unknown to the spies a certain suspect responsible for the athletes disappearances was licking her lips.

Well, if the author is to believe, even she would want a bike that looks like the one he’s got.

"Well he should make quit the prize for me." The suspect said.

"Sean come on we have a job to do." Sam said.

"Alright alright hang on." Sean said parking his bike. "Man I wish I could ride this thing more often." Sean said smirking.

It’s bad enough the author threw in a bike track for no reason with a literal transforming car in this episode, but don’t you have enough toys to ride already?

Soon they found the driver known as Dale. "Hey can have a minute?" Sean asked till the driver turned around.

"Sean is that you?" Dale asked.

"Have we met?" Sean asked.

"Don't you remember the old motorcycle race two years ago?" Dale asked.

I don’t know what’s going on with this ‘Sean knows the hunk of the week’ pointlessness. Is the author feeling his self-insert so inferior he needs to weave him into everyone’s lives? Is he just trying to invoke a bro code to make the girls ignore them in favor of himself? I don’t get it.

"Oh now I remember I thought there was something familiar about you. I just didn't get your name back then." Sean said remembering the race.

"What race?" Donna asked.

Well, it can’t have been one he lost, I’m willing to bet that much.

"A customized motorcycle race back then in Sparta I completely forgot about that." Sean said.

I’ve practically forgotten about Sparta myself. It has about the same relevancy and influence as Krypton to Metropolis.

"Well what brings you all the way out here?" Dale asked.

"Well we're here to investigate the incident during your last race can you tell us what you remember?" Sean asked.

Yeah, I can totally see Dale is now being fooled by your mission’s cover as journalists in inquiring about this, Sean.

"Not much other then the flash of light the made me lose control. Almost made me hit that photographer." Dale said.

"Photographer?" Sam asked.

Flash photography must be the culprit then.

"Yeah guy was on a motorcycle then drove off. Look we can talk about this later I got a publicity photo shoot in a few minutes." Dale said walking off.

No, Dale, you fool, they’ll have photographers there!

"Hmm whoever he's talking about might be connected to the others disappearance." Sam said.

"Yup my thoughts exactly he's going to race again soon so we better keep a close eye out for anything." Sean said.


Dale was doing his photo shoot while the spies observed from the sidelines till a person on a motorcycle appeared and threw a smoke bomb at them. While they were all distracted the driver fired a beam at Dale who vanished.

A steel beam, wooden, made of ice or lightning, as if the author even knows there’s differences in the English language.

"Now for my personal prize." The driver said firing at Sean who vanished as well.

"SEAN!" The girls yelled seeing he vanished as well.


Sean soon woke up strapped to a bed in only his boxers.

This is either going to be painful, or entirely hilarious, to me.

"Ah finally awake handsome." A female voice said and looked to see a woman of Japanese descent wearing only a small robe of sorts that stopped at her thighs.

Yeah, something like that is called a ‘dress’, moron.

"And you are?" Sean asked making the woman giggle cutely and sat on the bed with him tracing her fingers on his muscled chest.

"Carla Wong." Carla said enjoying feeling his muscled chest.

"Wait the lady dragon? Your the one thats been abducting people? Why?" Sean asked.

Could you stop playing ‘zero degrees of separation’ with Sean and the cast to let him know everything without Jerry’s briefings, author? It’s about as shameless as the sex scene coming up.

"Simple I created a video game system that would make every other system look like a joke but no one would listen to my plan so I had to take a more drastic approach." Carla said moving her hands to his face as she traced her fingers over his jaw.

"And how do I fit into this a soldier game system?" Sean asked making her giggle.

I’ll just start ignoring the plot of this episode. The author clearly did too, what with the athlete kidnapping meant to substitute game A.I. being wasted on this numskull.

"No actually you are more of a prize for myself as I will be to you by the end of the day."

Sorry, is this a femme fatale, or the UPS?

Carla said standing up.

"Meaning?" Sean asked but already had a good guess as she untied the sash around her robe and stood before him in the nude and smiled as she saw him looking at her nude body.

"Simple you can have your way with me handsome."

Because the least bit of non-consent between these two enemies would just be unrealistic. I find it funny the author even bothered pretending tying Sean down meant something.

Carla said unbinding his wrests and yelped in surprise when he shoved her on her back and was face to face with him as he grinned at her and shoved his tongue in her mouth making her moan as she wrapped her arms and legs around him. Sean pulled away and took of his boxers and she licked her lips seeing her prize.

With that being nearly all its ever called, I'm willing to think is shaped like a trophy

"Lets have a little fun first." Sean said sitting on her chest having his member between her large breasts making her giggle softly as she pressed them together and moved them up and down while he thrusted into them. Carla moaned as she when the tip was close enough licked it making him groan.

Fantasizing yet again with the same positions and acts, this time with game developer in his imagination. I’m surprised this trash didn’t come out as a commentary statement about the game industry.

Carla then used one arm to keep them pressed together while her free hand played with his balls making him groan out.

"Mmm come on handsome let me have it." Carla said sexually as she licked the tip faster wanting her prize.

Just how many different ways do you want to use that word in this chapter, author? Do you think this is how you establish a theme?

Sean grinned as he could hold off her attempts to make him come for a long time.

"Beg for it then." Sean said in a dominating voice making her shudder and her pussy got wetter from the sound of his voice.

His regular voice must be the brown note.

"Please come on my face master come on my slutty face."

I’d say this escalated fast, but to the author women simply have no other settings!

Carla said begging with a whimper in her voice making Sean smirk before he thrusted faster into her boobs making her moan as gasped as he came on her face and she sighed in bliss as his warm substance covered her face.

Substance. That’s a new one. It should be illegal with this author’s abuse of it, too.

She licked up every drop she could before she got on her hands and knees and shakes her ass at him. "Now for the real fun master take me." Carla said spanking herself making him chuckle and lined himself up and thrusted into her pussy making her gasp and grasped the sheets tightly and Sean noticed tears coming out of her eyes and then saw blood coming out of her entrance.

"Carla your a virgin?" Sean asked making her sigh.

EVERY WOMAN YOU FUCK IS A VIRGIN, SEAN!!! You see, girls in this universe are born with the innate knowledge on how to behave, be in awe, and flirt with you, on how to do amazingly at fulfilling your every sexual preference without prompt or instruction, on how to ease onto the golden prong between your legs like they were the condoms that opposingly don’t exists in the realm you inhabit, just so they can be confident in their defaulted slutty behavior as they spank and degrade themselves for your sole amusement, and it’s an incredible marvel the human race persists since you are the sole catalyst, receiver, and instigator of genital jousting, that’s how fucking transparent this entire reality is about it having been forged around the dick-compensating, slut-slobbering fever-dream this author calls a fanfic!!

While that was a rant and a half I had to vent, I am genuinely concerned this dipshit will ask the same question towards the mothers of the Spies, and get a positive answer.

"Yes I was saving it for someone special and then I found you my love."

Don’t start using words you don’t know the meaning of, author. Love has no part in this.

Carla said whimpering and gasped as he kissed her neck lovingly making her moan in satisfaction. "Promise you wont leave me when this is done my love." Carla said begging as if she was afraid.

On which step of how to handle kidnapping people did you get confused, Carla?

"I wont on one condition.

You just negated your own fantasy ultimatum, you dumb goose.

When this is done you turn yourself in and live with me. I can convince my boss to keep you out of jail just so long as you don't cause anymore trouble and release the other athletes." Sean said. Now she had two options here give up her lifes work and be happy as she is now or continue down her path and making herself famous the choice was clear.

She doesn’t even know who he is, who he works for, or where he lives. Fuck that, even I don’t know where he lives, I’ve been complaining non-stop about that, too!

"As long as I have you I would give up everything love. Now please just make me a real woman." Carla said kissing him lovingly and moaned in bliss as he thrusted into her willsex and felt her hips slap against his powerful thrusts that sent pleasurable ripples across her body. "Yes! Yes! More master fuck me! Fuck your slave!"

How many chapters will I have to sit through, waiting to see a woman acting like she’s at least of an equal level to Sean? I’m currently suspecting all of them.

Carla said in bliss as she could feel her approaching orgasm coming fast and hard and gasped as he thrusted into her with inhuman speed and spanked her ass before she screamed out in sexual bliss as she came and whimpered out as if she was in paradise as he came inside her womb. She honestly wish she wasn't on the pill right now so she could have a baby but since she was 23(I know she's older then that in canon but I'm making her younger so she can have a longer sex life) and he was 17 she knew he wasn't ready just yet but she could wait a couple years till then.


I know that some of you would almost expect this nagging tick of an embarrassingly insistent mention at every turn to earn itself a counting gag, but until I see a repeat offender, I won’t bother as I think I already know the end result. 452.

"I'm not done with you yet Carla." Sean said moving her to the floor as her back was on he ground while he held her legs up to her shoulders as he held her down and postponed his cock

Oh, don’t I wish.

at her other hole making her eyes widen and gulped before she smiled and nods at him and he slowly inserts himself into her ass making her yell out in bliss before he thrusted into her with deep thrusts making her eyes widen slightly feeling him all the way inside her ass.

I really want to know at this point, did a comma kill your dog, or something?

"Yes master fuck my ass! It feels so good!" Carla moaned out feeling so complete as her lover thrusted into her ass before moving even faster into her making her gasp and whimper repeatedly as she could feel another orgasm coming and yelled in sexual bliss again while he still fucked her. "Mmmm master pull it out and come on me outside." Carla moaned out and he did just so before stroking himself a few seconds before he blew his load on her body making her whimper and moan in bliss.

Chew-toys squeak less than this blowup-doll.

"How was that now?" Sean asked picking her up and sat her down the bed making her moan in bliss before she kissed his forehead lovingly.

Bliss, bliss, bliss, do you want to give her an overdose or did your synonym book’s pages get too sticky, author?

"Can you do one more thing for me?" Carla asked.

"And what would that be?" Sean asked and she turned her neck to the right.

"Mark me." Carla said making him chuckle.

First I thought this ‘marking’ business was typically a furry shtick. Then I learn the word odaxelagnia (link) and my conclusion that the author is nothing but a sadist was only further confirmed.

"Carla I have to tell you something first before you make this decision. You see your not the only girl I'm romantically involved with and I want to know you'll be ok with sharing me with others." Sean said making her smile before she kissed where his heart was.

This is not the time for another blowjob.

"You could have a thousand girls for all I care so long as you love all of us equally then I'm yours."

The fact that she’s only off by about fifty percent makes me want to cry.

Carla said making him smile and he leaned down and she turned her neck to the right and he slowly bite down on her neck making her gasp in pain and had tears run down her eyes but held in her pained scream as she held him tightly and breathed slowly as the pain passed away and he licked the blood away.

Why do I get the feeling that this author could read the Fifty Shades books, and have his writing skills and tastes in kinks marginally improved.


Carla was taken into custody after she released the others she's captured and would soon be released once the spies found a private home away from their parents.

Sean would keep up his visits to Carla as much as possible till they found that home and by the look of things would be soon.

Wait, you are skipping to Season 3 already, or will you give me a heart attack and think up something original?

Currently Sean was with Clover who was giving him a little lap dance till the lock of the front door of her house clicked and she quickly dashed upstairs to get dressed.

"Clover I..Oh who are you now?" Clovers mother Stella said kindly giving him a warm smile.

People feigning this amount of calmness at finding an unannounced stranger popping a boner on the couch in their home are typically dialing the police behind their back.

"Oh you must be Clovers mom I see where she gets her looks from like mother like daughter." Sean said making Stella blush and giggle lightly. "The names Sean Ashburn Kruger I'm a foreign exchange student from Sparta and Clover invited me to stay here since she wanted some company tonight." Sean said.

If you stop talking now, maybe Clover’s mother won’t believe that her daughter has turned into a total hussy while she didn’t notice. Oh, silly me, did I say ‘believe’? I meant to say ‘know the truth’.

"Oh hey mom sorry about not calling about this I didn't think you'd be home till tomorrow." Clover said dressed in regular cloths and happy Sean gave a good lie as to why he was really here.

He was full of shit, yeah, but exactly what part of what he said was a lie, you dim ditz?

"Well its ok just so long as you both behave I don't want grandkids just yet you know." Stella said making Clover blush in embarrassment.

"MOM!" Clover yelled making Sean and Stella laugh.

Are you proud of yourself now, author? Had your laugh? Padded yourself for pointlessly butchering that joke? Your height of material in humor and jokes are made from the scum I wouldn’t want to piss into by the dumpsters behind an amateur comedy club.

"Thats the third time I've heard that first Carmen then Gabriella now you why do you guys keep saying that I'm a gentlemen here come on." Sean said playfully making the girls giggle.

Urgh, as if the constant giggling wasn’t enough, you can even hear the canned laughter the author was imagining his cheeky wit deserved.

Stella couldn't deny that the young man was very attractive but she was an older woman and her daughter seemed to have a thing for him although.

'Hmm maybe if I can get a private setting when Clover is away I can have a real nice time with him if I get the chance.' Stella thought.

Privacy? I only think that’s an option in this fanfic when you have a fetish for getting caught.

Authors note: Oooooh I am evil here. What could our blond MILF be planing or better yet what could her MILF friends be planing separately?

Or even better yet, what could you be doing instead of force-feeding us your plots in your author’s notes?

Find out in a few chapters or maybe the next one.

Well, clearly you have planned out every plot point to perfection, Napoleon.

Anyway yeah Carla is now a member of the harem and which episode is next well you'll just have to wait and see. See ya. Oh and I made a poll so you can all decide on which MILF goes first.

Because even who has the honor of being Sean’s fifth, sixth, and seventh lay specifically warrants such a fuss.


And yes, I’m not counting Donna as sworn in. She was diddled by Alex, nothing else. If the author keeps letting his cum-rags slip through the cracks from his own boredom after soiling himself from them, it’s only more the reason to mock the Pollock painting this picture will result in.

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Re: New Spy

Post by GorillaGamer » Mon Feb 19, 2018 3:07 am

Having read the poorly-written lemon in this chapter, I've developed a hunch on where this author picked up his writing skills from.

There's this flash game studio, titled MeetandFuck that has produced a ton of R-18 flash games where the women look like they come from a phantom00 fic, and the dialogue is worse than that of cheap porno parodies. which is funny considering that M&F love doing parodies of recognizable franchises, including Totally Spies. I'm willing to bet that dragonlord0 has plenty of experience with these games.
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sun Feb 25, 2018 1:12 pm

GorillaGamer wrote:
Mon Feb 19, 2018 3:07 am
Having read the poorly-written lemon in this chapter, I've developed a hunch on where this author picked up his writing skills from.

There's this flash game studio, titled MeetandFuck that has produced a ton of R-18 flash games where the women look like they come from a phantom00 fic, and the dialogue is worse than that of cheap porno parodies. which is funny considering that M&F love doing parodies of recognizable franchises, including Totally Spies. I'm willing to bet that dragonlord0 has plenty of experience with these games.
Now that you mention it, I can see the comparison so frighteningly clear, actually. A mass-produced, low-effort, near-identical masturbation-prompt, forged from a couple of random sex positions set up to stage cheap titillation, just in fanfic form. If the author was somehow - dare I use the word? - inspired by these games, I wish he had got himself off to those instead, so he could actually bother trying to write something of substance without constantly distracting himself.

I'm mostly surprised at how the author drags this out, probably thinking that building up this harem one girl at a time somehow portrays him as dedicated or paying attention to the characters. Here's Chapter 9, Carmen's affection.

Chapter 9 Carmen's affection

The author’s own mother doesn’t hug him enough.

(Now before we begin a winner has been selected for the first MILF to be taken by Sean enjoy)

I don’t think you understand the implications of drawing the shortest straw, author.

Sean yawned as he slowly got up and felt Alex on his chest making him smirk kissing her forehead. Alex woke up and grinned at him.

Is every chapter now going to open up on Sean waking up with a girl latched onto him like a parasite?

"Mmmm morning care for a quickie?" Alex asked pushing him back down and slid him inside her making her moan softly as he slowly thrusted into her upwards. "Ooooh yes more." Alex moaned as she slammed down on him when she could.

Damn quick time events.

Alex gasped as his hands dug into her hips tightly. "Mmmm faster." Alex moaned out and gasped as he thrusted faster into her making her breasts move up and down with each thrust.

Quickie indeed. We’re halfway through this scene, yet it still has about as much to it as a regular sex scene by this author’s standards.

Little did the two know Carmen coming home late last night looks through the crack of the door. She was only in a small robe that was open showing she had nothing behind it as she fingered herself.

'Mmmm thats it I cant take it anymore once Alex leaves for today I'm taking him for some nice long fun of my own.' Carmen thought in her head as she quickly left to make some special reservations at a special place she knew.

Because ordinary reservations at an ordinary place wouldn’t be special enough for the author’s special invocation of the word special to make things special. Special schmuck.

Alex moaned out in bliss as Sean continued to thrust into her wet sex.

"Yes! Yes! YES!" Alex yelled in pleasure as she received her favorite pleasure.

Are tautologies the only thing remaining for you to use to pretend being able to write a sex scene, author?

Alex gasped when he sits up and kisses her breasts making her moan holding his head close. "Mmmm I'm so close I AHHH!" Alex yelled out as she came and shuddered as he came inside her womb. "Mmmmm so warm." Alex moaned out kissing his chest as they fell back down.

Since sex-bots have actually become a thing, I’d hope for the industry that they come with less repetitive dialogue and longer battery time than this author’s imaginary lays.

Down stairs Carmen heard it all and blushed thinking of the things he could do to her.

"Just a few more hours and I'll have a piece of that myself." Carmen said rubbing her thighs together.

Author, I don't know if this will ever enter that soup you call your brain, but Carmen is currently an antagonist. She intends to steal Sean from her own daughter. Just because you won't write that to happen, actual character motivation is an emergent property derived from actions more so than anything else in fiction.


Alex went to the mall with the girls while Carmen had asked Sean to come with her for an appointment.

"Ok so what is this appointment?" Sean asked as they parked.

Are you really this whipped that you can’t ask before letting yourself be dragged around by your balls, dickhead?

"Oh you'll see just follow me and do as I say ok dear?" Carmen said sweetly making him chuckle.

"Yes dear." Sean said making her giggle.

'Just wait honey you'll see where Alex gets her kinks from when you make me scream out your name.'

Should I get concerned that you somehow knew what your daughter’s kinks were, when Alex herself didn’t?

Carmen thought as they entered the place and Carmen led him to a private part of the building. As soon as She closed the door and locked it.

"So what exactly..." Was as far as Sean got before she pushed him up against a wall and kissed him lovingly. Sean was surprised at first but seeing the lust she had in her eyes he guessed she's felt this way for a while now.

Oh, well, if she’s been hungering for long enough, that eliminates any objection, of course. Do you have restraining orders put against you by any chance, author?

"Um ok I wasn't expecting that." Sean said laughing slightly. "So you brought me here for..." Sean tried to say.

"A little MILF fun

Even if you played a hentai game called MILF Fun, where the objective was to have fun with MILFs, I’d still think no one actually would say something like that.

since I've seen what you and Alex have been doing behind her closed door.

Oh yes, that secretive living room door, providing the privacy of fuck all.

This morning when you took her you were so passionate to her treating her like a queen.

Now that I’ve stopped laughing, here’s my question. That’s what you call your half-assed IKEA erotica puppet shows, author? A royal treatment? The guillotine treated royalty better.

Now its my turn honey." Carmen said kissing his cheek.

"Carmen she isn't the only one you see in my country..." Sean tried to say.

This again? Seriously, author, do you just not believe open relationships are a thing because otherwise you assume you’d have a girlfriend?

"I already know about the laws your home has honey and if I have to share you so be it besides what man doesn't want to see a mother and her daughter please a man they love."

Congratulations author, your bad grammar just came closer to describing cuckolding instead of your preferred fantasy.

Carmen said licking his neck making him chuckle as he held her face lovingly.

"By the way where are we exactly?" Sean asked making her giggle as she led him to another room and he blinked seeing it was a large ass steam room that was all misty.

A place where the author can compensate for being unable to write sex as either hot or wet. That’s the answer, right?

"A little game of mine I like to play a friend of mine owes me a favor so I paid a good amount of money for the room for the whole day just for us. Find me and I'm all yours big boy." Carmen said running off into the steam taking off her cloths in the process making Sean chuckle as he took off his own cloths and put them down in a locker.

Oh great, a game of naked hide-and-seek tempting dehydration and raised blood pressure by going on for longer than fifteen minutes.

"I swear mom was right all women in America are crazy but in this case its a good thing." Sean said following the trail of cloths she left behind. Sean looked around for a few minutes till he grinned as he span around and pulled her into a kiss making her moan as she jumped and wrapped her legs around his waist.

How exciting. Totally made the steam room worth it. Carmen truly go her money’s worth on this one. Yawn.

"How did you know I was behind you?" Carmen asked not really caring just wanting to have her fun.

"Simple you I listened to the sounds. Now your mine."

Really? Was it the sound of soggy clothes on the floor, because the author is doing a shit job of telling me anything else.

Sean said shoving her on the floor making her grunt in pain but enjoyed it.

This is just going to be another of what we've seen half a dozen times by now. Sean is going to as a minimum stick his dick in her pussy and ass, likely in that order, there will be pain that she will enjoy, and some submissive dirty talk. Try and prove me wrong author, because I could spend another paragraph mentioning your repeats of stock-photo levels of point-by-point genital-mashing, you one-note instrument.

"Ooooh going to be rough now are we?" Carmen said playfully and gasped as he quickly thrusted into her wet sex making her shudder from the size of his cock inside her pussy. "Oh god yes." Carmen moaned out and whimpered as he thrusted viciously into her bruising her slightly but she loved it since to her it was like he was marking her.

Why do I have the feeling that the reason Sean isn't simply giving her a golden shower is because the author don't know what that is?

She gasped as he pulled on her hair to pull her into a kiss making her moan and whimper as she held his face lovingly. She moaned and whimpered in bliss as Sean rubbed her cheek loving before pulling back and kissed her throat making her giggle slightly as he kissed her all over where he could reach.

I can’t tell the difference between Carmen and a wounded animal at this point, and I’m not entirely sure Sean would care either way.

"You know Alex has a special kink when it comes to sex lets see if you have it." Sean said making her giggle.

What was that I hear? Another excuse for the author to not write a woman any different than he did before?

"Oh and what Kink would that be?" Carmen asked but yelled in surprise as he changed positions quickly to where she was on her hands and knees and he thrusted into her with almost inhuman speeds making her eyes roll into the back of her head.

"Simple insulting yourself and letting loose." Sean said kissing her neck.

Therapy isn’t so much a suggestions as it is mandatory with the self-esteem issues you cause, Sean.

"Oh god yes fuck me." Carmen said and gasped as his left hand went to her right boob and pulled on her tit. "Ahhh! Yes use me I'm a slutty mother who enjoys being used by anyone fuck me!"

Anyone, you say? That explains how Sean passed through whatever standards were set by your previous lover. Not that the virgin-perving author can even imagine such a thing.

Carmen yelled and yelled when he forced her head down and thrusted into her downward making a slight bulge when his cock hit her womb. "Ugh! Fuck me you Spartan Stud I'm nothing but a Whore who as a slutty daughter fuck me!"

So, if anything, I think we can conclude that Sean is just a glorified bimbo tuning fork.

Carmen yelled out in bliss and cried out as she came on his cock and whimpered in sadness when he pulled out of her pussy but sighed in content when he came on her back feeling his warm substance.

You come across as if not knowing yourself what Sean is ejaculating, author. Do you just think the word is somehow erotic, is that it?

"Mmmmm so warm." Carmen moaned out in bliss.

"Not done yet." Sean said picking her up and has her legs spread out and thrusted into her again making her gasp and had a fucked silly expression on her face.

Stop simply splurging out your browser search queries, author, and provide details. You must have seen porn, correct? Why can’t you then describe it beyond expressions translating to ‘insert whatever that means to you here’ for your readers?

"Oh my god yes! Yes Fuck me like the whore I am!" Carmen yelled out having her tongue hang out of her mouth.

Could you change the radio station? Nothing’s on but ‘Fuck me, I’m a whore’ at the moment.

"Well I guess you do have the same king as your daughter."

That’s because the only thing original here is the spelling errors, your highness.

Sean said smirking as he played with her breasts making her moan more and tried to pull him into a kiss but the best she could do was tongue him.

If you wanted to fuck a dog, I think you should just write Animal Crossing fanfics instead, author.

"Oh yes fuck me hard it feels so good." Carmen said in bliss as her new lover fucked her hard and good. She gasped when he pulled out and grab her legs and hung her upside down and thrusted into her downwards making her see the bulge he made when his cock hit her womb.

Not that I’m pining for visual novel length dialogue in this trash, but could you even justify the purpose of these details, since they impact nothing but your own tug-job, author?

She gasped when he rubbed his fingers on her pussy to increase her pleasure some more and shrieked when she came and actually sprayed a little and gasped whimpered and shuddered when he came inside her womb feeling his seed inside her belly.

And then another sentence with ten things happening all at once was considered, but having one of those was fine enough for the author, so it was left out.

"Oh my god its so warm." Carmen said in bliss.

Speaking of warm, does the author even remember you two are fucking in a hot, humid, and slippery place, because that has had about the same impact as this fanfic on my hopes for humanity.

"You got one more hole to fill Carmen can you handle it like your daughter?" Sean asked in a rather husky voice making her shiver in excitement.

"Do it Fuck me in my ass all you want." Carmen said and moaned as he rubbed his cock between her ass cheeks making her smile a little. "But one thing for me first." Carmen said.

If it’s about birth control, I think it’s too late for condoms, but you already seem to rely on your menopause and the heat of the room to lower Sean’s sperm count.

"And that would be?" Sean asked as she turned around and pulled him into a loving kiss.

"Kiss me where my heart is and let me watch you fuck me."

Did you just learn where that organ is in Anatomy 101 and you feel too proud not to share, author?

Carmen said making him smile and kissed her on the lips lovingly making her moan and he pulled back and kiss her right breast where her heart is making her smile more and held his face lovingly before he lined himself up to her second hole and thrusted into her making her gasp and held his shoulders as she breathed heavily before relaxing and laid back down as he thrusted into her ass slowly at first so she could adjust to his size.

Seven ‘and’s later, the author is none the wiser to the location of his illusive comma key.

"Mmmm it feels so good I'm at my limit here finish me off I'm all yours."

I hear a ‘check, please’ as the author is too bored to bother with an ass fucking longer than two sentences.

Carmen said and pulled him into another kiss as they both came at the same time. Carmen moaned in loving bliss as she pulled back from the kiss.

"I love you honey more then you could imagine."

Considering this author, that’s not much.

Carmen said making him smile and kissed her heart.

It’s almost funny, seeing the author attempting and failing to figure out what genuine affection is and how it can be conveyed.

"And I love you and your daughter." Sean said picking her up bridal style making her smile as he picked up her cloths and put his back on while he got hers in a bag and quickly put her in a robe while he carried her back to the car in the back.

Since his hands were occupied carrying her bridal style for that sentence, I guess his magic dick did the other shit.

Carmen being a little devious once they're both in the car pulls off her robe as he drove them back home where they would explain this to Alex.

Wow, exhibition is just such a rare and unique trait among these ladies the author rolls up from his single-setting assembly line, huh?

Authors note: YES! finally I got to the hottest mom in the series here in a lemon.

Yes, I could totally tell how enamored you are with her what with how you've described literally none of her features.

Now many of you are wondering how exactly are they going to explain this to Alex and the girls well find out next time.

How are the going to explain? As if clickbait was even your calling, author, with your track record, everyone already knows how. Through sex!

See ya. Next time Spy versus Spy.

Liar. That one’s not coming up for five more chapters. Dick derailing your inspiration much, or was it the whiny reviewers clamoring at you?


And another portrait magnet is added to the fridge the author opens to sate his constant cravings from.

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sat Mar 03, 2018 7:50 am

Time for the author to crank out another one, as well as writing a chapter that has about as much to do with Totally Spies as Sean has any right to. Here's Chapter 10, Mother daughter bonding.

Chapter 10 Mother daughter bonding

Because what fanfic harem wouldn’t be woefully incomplete without incest?

"WHAT!" Alex yelled as her mother told her what happened.

No reason to yell, Alex, it’s your own fault believing the author, when he baited the explanation in the previous chapter, only to then open up on this one after the fact.

"I'm sorry honey I couldn't help myself. Do you know how long its been since I've been taken by a man who was as passionate as him?" Carmen said. Alex stuttered before she sighed honestly she couldn't blame her mother at all.

"Well I guess I can accept this but lets get one thing clear we all share him equally." Alex said making her mother smile and nod.

Even your personal dick-stroking fluff fails to grasp what propels a story, author. Conflict! There is none to be found in this entire fanfic. It is about as exciting and predictable as counting upwards from zero without end. Speaking of your harem list, I can tell its status won’t change anytime soon.

"Fair enough now come with me for a second." Carmen said dragging her daughter upstairs. Sean wasn't with them right now he was with Sam and Clover.

Carmen pulled Alex into her room and shut and locked the door.

"So what HMPH." Alex tried to say but she widen her eyes when her mother pulled her into a kiss.

Okay, ignoring the title of this story, where the fuck did that even come from? Can’t the author go a single chapter without wearing cum-tinted glasses to pretend these events even have a lead-in?

"Wha?" Alex said in a daze making her mother giggle as she took off her own cloths standing in front of her daughter in nothing but her birthday suit.

"Lets get you out of those cloths dear." Carmen said removing her daughters skirt and sports bra leaving her naked as her.

"Um this isn't what I..." Alex tried to say but her mother placed her hands on her hips and squeezed them making her moan.

Apply pressure to the squeaky toy for instant sound. Warning, do not let the toy get caught in an elevator door.

"Just let me take the lead on this one baby."

She pretty much has to, since the author can’t write either of you to pretend to admire his wish-fulfillment avatar’s dick during this scene.

Carmen said as she got to her knees and licked her lips seeing her daughters shaven pussy lips. She placed her mouth over her womanhood and Alex gasped lightly before she moaned and bucked her hips into her mothers mouth.

"Mmmm this feels so weird."

Oh, what’s one complex more or less to you in this fanfic anyway, Alex?

Alex said as she cupped her breasts and played with them.

Carmen giggled as she sucked on her daughters pussy before she stuck her tongue inside making Alex shriek slightly but didn't stop her as she pushed her mothers head deeper into her.

Could you please stop this endless parade of grammar, that leaves half the people to be physically invading bodily orifices with their entire body parts, author?

"Oh god yes more!" Alex moaned out as she pushed her mother in deeper into her sex wanting to cum so badly right now. Carmen giggle before she bit down on her pussy making Alex let loose and screamed in bliss as she came in her mothers mouth and fell down on the bed panting in bliss.

Okay, I need to know, is it just because your porn is suffering from censor pixilation that you think biting is the fanny fun finisher, author?

"Mmm delicious." Carmen said licking up every drop. Carmen then quickly went through a bag she had with her and Alex blushed seeing a strap on that she put on.

Did she happen to have that bag with her to the steam room, or did she summon it from the author’s ass for the same reason?

"Come here baby." Carmen said sitting next to her and Alex got on her lap and moaned when her mother kissed her neck lovingly. "Mmmm you taste perfect honey now lets see how good you are when I fuck you with my special toys." Carmen said pushing Alex on her stomach and grabbed a hold of her legs in the wheel barrel position and thrusted into her daughter who gasped in surprise before she moaned in bliss.

Though I’m afraid to do so, I now either have to ask what exactly you imagine a wheel barrel position to be, or why you think it is supposed to be called that, author?

"Yes Yes YES!" Alex moaned out in pure bliss as her mother fucked her from behind.

"Mmmm thats it honey yell for mommy." Carmen said thrusting faster into her daughters pussy.

"YES! FUCK ME! FUCK ME LIKE THE SLUT I AM!" Alex yelled in pure bliss as she lost her sense of sanity and just yelled as her mother fucked her from behind.

Somehow I’m still not that impressed that this author has found a way to encompass every possible unintentional meaning of the words ‘fucking crazy’.

"Mmmm I guess Sean was right you do let loose when you have sex."

I guess some of the dialogue has to pretend all of these sex scenes are connected, since the plot won’t do it for them.

Carmen said before Alex gasped as she came again and came on the strap on. "Mmmm you came again already.

Oh, really? I didn’t notice. Maybe you should try and say it a fourth time.

Well I'm not done yet young lady." Carmen said pulling out and toon off the strap on and placed her hands on her ass making Alex moan before she lightly gasped as her mother kissed her ass cheeks lovingly.

With all this moaning and gasping, I’m pretty sure the author can only get himself off to sluts who hyperventilate.

"Mmm mommy don't kiss me there it feels weird."

Has all the other ways she’s kissed you in this chapter felt completely ordinary to you, Alex?

Alex moaned out making Carmen giggled before she kissed them again making Alex moan more. Alex the gasped when she spread her cheeks apart and licked her rosebud. "Mmmm Mommy don't please." Alex said blushing.

I just hope the grammar won’t take another nosedive and make me question during this rimjob whose head is up whose ass.

"Shhhh don't worry Alex you'll enjoy this." Carmen said as she stuck her tongue into her anus making Alex blush and whimper as she gripped the bed sheets tightly and bit down on them to muffle her screams.

Projecting a bit, or does Carmen have a barbed tongue the size of a dead eel, author? Sean has already plowed this crevice to less effect.

Carmen giggled as she licked her daughter ass before she placed her fingers on her sex and fingered her making Alex gasp again before she bucked into her hand.

"Mmm mommy I cant last much longer." Alex moaned out.

Already? After a tongue up the ass and diddling for five seconds? The author seems about as impatient with this sex scene as myself.

"Let it out honey cum for mommy." Carmen said sensually making Alex let loose and let out a silent scream as she came again and panted in bliss with her tongue hanging out of her mouth.

"Mmmm now for the best part." Carmen said grabbing a hold of her left leg and put it over her shoulder and slowly pressed her sex against hers making Alex gasp in shock before groaning out in bliss as her mother thrusted into her sex with hers.

Panting bliss, groaning bliss, moaning bliss, bliss, bliss, bliss, a proverbial blizzard, because that’s how lost the meaning of that word is at this point!

"Mmmm Mom where did you learn all of this?" Alex asked making Carmen giggle.

The author’s download queue. Also known as half his research material for this fanfic.

"Lets just say I was a real wild girl when I was your age. The most daring thing I ever did was go streaking during the night when no one could see me." Carmen said giggling from the memory.

One type. Default. Mono. This author has the originality of jack-in-the-box. Oh, what could this next female character’s traits possibly be? Surprise, it's the fucking same as the last one. Now watch the author put it back into the box to wind it up for the next one, <strong>AGAIN!!</strong>

Carmen moaned with her daughter as their sexes rubbed against each other. Carmen grinned when she felt her own orgasm approaching and rubbed faster into her daughters wet sex.

Do you use a coin flip to tell whether to call it a pussy or a sex, author? Because, let me tell you, you could do with a new coin at this point.

Alex moaned in bliss as she felt her biggest orgasm coming fast and grabbed her mothers head and pulled her into a kiss which she accepted and both screamed in pure bliss

Oh, it’s pure now, that’s totally different. These sex scenes are so mechanical, it’s like an assembly line of sexual organs being prodded consistently and procedurally to test if they are up to code.

as they came together having their love juices spray on each other before Alex went limp as her mother caught her and giggled as she kissed her daughters forehead before she got some new sheets on the bed and laid her down.

I also like to juggle dead weight while changing bed sheets with my telekinesis.

"Mmm you were perfect honey now just wait till I show you some things I've learned when you get your energy back." Carmen said kissing her daughter as she fell asleep on her breasts and drifted off to sleep with her.

And who could forget the inevitable cunt coma; sleep, the only transition possible after a lemon.

Authors note: Little something I thought of and wanted to write it. Now next time we finally get to the old spies. See ya.

Wrong again.


And nothing has changed. Stagnation is this author's only reward.

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sat Mar 31, 2018 5:14 pm

I'm back at it with this smut-fest once again. If only there was a way to channel all this drive these bad lemon-writing fanfic authors seem to have into something productive, the world would be a different place. Here’s Chapter 11, little public fun.

Chapter 11 little public fun

(I keep meaning to do the spy vs spy but something keeps getting in my head)

Then finish masturbating before you start writing, author, or would that just betray your only motivation for this fanfic?

Sam and Donna were giggling as they made their way towards an old abandoned building.

"If we get caught we're going to get into so much trouble." Sam said but never stopped laughing. Both were dressed in trance coats and nothing else.

We get it, author, you lost the pieces for your dress-up dolls, they haven’t worn a shred of normal clothing for several chapters now.

"But it would be so worth it." Donna said as the entered the building and went down to the basement where Donna turned on the lights and the room was decently cleaned.

"Now then." Sam said removing her trance coat along with Donna and both were completely naked.

Wait, wait, wait, is this it, author? That was your presentation of exhibitionism? Open up on these two chicks wandering inside an abandoned place, have them hide down in a basement and start enacting whatever lesbian porno you’re streaming off of PornHub? Do you just pretend to know half of these fetishes in your fanfics?

"Ah this feels good now lets have some fun." Donna said pushing Sam down on the floor and positioned her pussy over her mouth and moaned as Sam grabbed her legs and swirled her tongue around her pussy. "Oh yeah thats it eat me out you bitch." Donna said in bliss as she played with her breasts.

I’m seriously going to count the amount of bliss that’s in this trash at some point. I think you forgot to put some pain in there alongside a bag of sex toys, too, author, you one-note hack.

"Mmm tasty." Sam said shoving her tongue in making Donna gasp in bliss as she placed her hand on her head playing with her hair.

"Yes more." Donna said bucking her hips forward into her mouth. "Ooooh yes bite me." Donna said. Sam smirked before she bites down on her pussy enough to make Donna scream out but she didn't care since no one ever came to this place anymore.

Ever since it was condemned for the toxic spill that has obviously contaminated the entire neighborhood and turned everyone into brainless sex-maniacs.

Donna gritted her teeth to hold back her approaching orgasm but couldn't. "Shit I'm about to cum." Donna said trying to hold it back.

"Don't hold back let it out." Sam said kissing her pussy before Donna screamed out as she exploded all over her face making Sam sigh in bliss. "Mmmm that feels good on me." Sam said licking ever spot she could.

You have your fun as long as you can, Sam, the illiterate author hasn’t realized yet that he just described you to be covered in human gore.

"Now its your turn." Donna said getting into the bag she had with them and pulled out a whip a paddle electric nipple clamps and double strap on for both her holes.

It’s not that your grammar leaves something to be desired, author. It’s that your is desires are in need of some grammar.

"Whoa were did you get those?" Sam asked in excitement.

From a Toys"R"Us – where the fuck do you think?!

"From the sex store using a fake ID now then which one should I use first?

Thank you for reminding me, that unless they are MILF material, all your eye-candy is not legal, author.

Oh this one." Donna said grabbing the paddle. "From what Sean told me you love pain how much you want to bet I can make you cum like a fountain with these toys. Not money but lets say this if I can make you cum so hard with these you have to get a tattoo of my choosing anywhere on your body." Donna said picturing Sam having various ones from bitch slut whore slave and unmentionables.

How about an ‘L’ on her forehead, or is that just too self-aware and not objectifying and degrading enough for your taste of ridiculously sluttish bimbofication, author?

"And if I win?" Sam asked tracing her fingers on her ass before spanking herself.

"Hmm what do you want?" Donna asked being inches away from her lips.

This is all the author’s transcribed re-dub of some amateur sex tape, I just know it.

"Mmmm you live with me and the girls completely naked for the rest of the school year and whatever we want you to do." Sam said making Donna shudder.

"Oooh thats a good one deal."

Do you even understand the nature of a bet, author? Someone has to lose something, but at this point, they might as well have giggled and moaned and blissed their way to either outcome through a dare, because they would do it either way should your constant game of spin-the-dick land on that choice.

Dona said kissing her lovingly making both of them moan feeling their tongues moving around. "Now then." Donna said pushed her on her stomach and laid on her back facing her ass. "Wow look at these."

”I’m pointing something out, that means the author doesn’t have to describe it, right?”

Donna said moving her hands on her cheeks making Sam moan before she lightly gasped as she leaned down and kissed each cheek lovingly and licked them as well. "Once I'm done with these I'll give your sexy ass a little more attention."

And now I know of an ass who doesn’t know basic human anatomy, author.

Donna said before she raised her paddle and struck her ass hard making Sam gasp and held back her screams on bliss as she was punished hard. "Wow look at it move when I spank you." Donna said spanking her again over and over again.

Did you really have to degrade ‘show – don’t tell’ while you were at it?

By the time she was done Sam's ass was bright red but she didn't cum at all.

"So your holding back are you? Well lets see how you deal with this." Donna said getting off of her and pulled her up and tied her facing the wall. Donna puts the paddle down and goes for the whip. "I hope you scream my name once I'm done."

Okay, slow the fuck down, we haven’t even gotten to a safe word yet, and the author is already half-way through Fifty Shades of Grey here.

Donna said pulling back and struck Sam in the back making her gasp in bliss and moaned out loudly as she did so again leaving red whip marks on her back. "Come on baby scream my name." Donna said striking her again.

You’re just trying to make sure she’ll still remember it once the author has gone through the first half of his spank bank, right?

Once again Sam didn't cum but she was definitely close if her wet sex wasn't proof enough.

It’s not, author, it’s really not.

"Man you sure can hold out. I guess this is going to be more challenging then I thought." Donna said going for the nipple clamps and untied Sam who was smirking at her as she placed her on the table. "Now lets see you hold back when you got these on you." Donna said placing the clamps on her tits and turned them on and Sam gasped and gritted her teeth to keep herself from screaming.

Would she be screaming out of bliss or pain, author? Your intricate writing just leaves so many important questions unanswered.

She gripped the table so hard it actually started to crack. "Wow you just wont give up will you?" Donna said impressed. Sam was moaning so much she almost wanted to let go but she wanted to win the bet. Donna pulled the clamps off her nipples and Sam breathed hard as she tried to get her strength back.

"One more toy and if you can make me cum in ten minutes I win." Sam said making her smirk.

As if it wasn’t obvious enough that the author was making this up as he went along, you two can’t even pretend to have a bet without establishing the win conditions before now.

"Oh your going down for that." Donna said putting the double strap on, on herself and grinned as she lined herself up against her holes and thrusted forward making Sam gasp as she set the time next to them and enjoyed the ride.

Did you happen to find an egg timer in the magic bag, too, or is the author just staring at his bedroom clock, edging himself as he writes this shit?

Donna was doing everything in her power to make her cum. Pulled her hair her nippled slapping her around but nothing was working.

Well, maybe if you slowed down and used some commas, you wouldn’t keep hitting her invincibility frames.

She had only 30 seconds left and was about to give up when she saw Sam grunting hard signaling she was about to let lose.

"Thats it cum for me come on do it you bitch!" Donna said pulling her hair and Sam held back and just as the timer went off she screamed so loud she sprayed all over Donna's waist soaking her with her juices. "Aw man."

To be fair, I’d probably say the same thing if a chick shouted loud enough to manifest liquids out of thin air.

Donna said but still smiled as she leaned down and kissed her neck. "Your really good at this." Donna said making Sam smirk.

"I just know how to hold back good thing to otherwise the last second you would have won.

It’s probably for the better that spies likely are trained to resist torture and interrogations, when keeping in mind how this author can’t tell the difference between that and actual BDSM.

Now as for what I want simple for now." Sam said pulling the toy off of her and placed her sex against hers and moaned as she rubbed their sexes against each other.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!" Donna yelled as she received pleasure from her lover. Donna was moaning like a whore as Sam rubbed her pussy against hers.

I’m sorry, were we ever supposed to assume all your cum-rag muppets could moan as anything else, author?

"Mmmm now why don't you cum for me." Sam said take one hard thrust and both screamed as they came together.

So, the author blew his load a couple of sentences ago and couldn’t bother write out another ‘intense’ and ‘prolonged’ scene to let us wonder who’d win the ‘bet’. Calling it half-assed doesn’t even cut it at this point.

Donna fell down on her stomach panting in bliss before she gasped as Sam kissed her ass even licked it before she spread her cheeks apart and shoved her tongue deep inside her anus.

You make it sound like you amaze yourself at times, author. Do you not watch the porn through before your transcribe it here?

"Whoa wait I don't...Oh god yes."Donna said placing her hands on the table while Sam explored her body. Donna screamed again as she came after a few minutes of Sam's tongue in her ass.

"Now then lets get to Alex's house oh and lets make it fun."

Make it fun? I thought that was my job, you incompetent clown.

Sam said placing the toys and their coats inside the bag.

"Wait you want to go streaking?" Donna said getting her strength back.

"Uh huh don't tell me the thought of someone catching us scares you now?" Sam said teasingly making her grin.

”No, it’s just that the author hasn’t even done his other fetishes right this far.”

"Please if anything it gives me a chance to admire you more." Donna said kissing her neck making her sigh.

"Ok then ready set go." Sam said as they ran out the building and across the area to Alex's place fast.

I’m sure Alex loves living in the abandoned building district, and inviting streaking friends inside no matter the time of day.

Sam and Donna laughed as they made it back to the house.

Wow, how interesting, so important, totally not an off-handed footnote to emphasize the fact, that none of these girls can be told apart as they all subscribe to the same fetish provider, never even lingering on it long enough to let it have a point.

"That was fun." Donna said as they opened the door and to their shock or rather excitement Alex and her mother were on the couch with Carmen kissing her daughter with a blanket over them covering their nude bodies.

Okay, the most unrealistic thing in all of this has got to be the lack of locked doors to protect these acts of already unrealistically escalated debauchery. Or do you just jerk it in your parent’s living room for the excitement, author?

"Wow." Sam said surprising them.

"Uh hey girls." Alex said shyly.

"I didn't know you were into this sort of thing Alex." Sam said grinning.

"I didn't either not till after Mom told me she and Sean had their own fun last night."

Speaking of the dead-weight around my neck, is that pathetic excuse of an unintentional über-mench caricature going to return soon? It’s not that I want him to return, but this is the longest I’ve seen this author write anything without him, and his return would be the literary equivalent of a jump-scare by now.

Alex said making her mother smile and kissed her neck.

"Well since you girls had your own fun lets take this to the bed since you all look tired." Carmen said picking her daughter up bridal style making her giggle.

Sam and Donna smiled as they followed her. Carmen smirked as she felt their eyes on her ass and swayed in back and fourth. All four of them climbed into her bed

Because the author would need to give them a specific reason to realize this house has more than just one bed.

and Donna laid her head on Carmen's right breast while Sam placed hers on her left. Alex laid on top of her and fell asleep which made her smile before she turned the lights out and slept with a smile on her face.

When was the last time you people did anything but have sex and fall asleep? Do you even eat? Hell, it would be a miracle if you’ll ever have a moment of individuality ever again.


Clover moaned out as she bounced on Sean's cock before she yelled out as they came and fell on his chest before he pulled the covers over them and fell asleep.

Marvelous. It’s almost like the author needed to remind himself that his wish-fulfillment avatar still existed in this reality, in the only way he could imagine that was possible.

Unknown to them Stella was watching them nude as her daughter and fingered herslef.

Get both hands back on the keyboard, author!

"Mmm just wait big boy tomorrow its my turn." Stella said heading to her room.

Stella is Clover’s mother, for reference. Not that it matters to the author, since names are the only way he keeps track of these people, details and descriptions beyond the existence of sexual organs being a myth to him.

Authors note: Idea was given to a friend who messaged me his idea of Sam and Donna.

Since you can’t even communicate this thought correctly, author, what’s your secret to getting friends?

Anyway next chapter I'm not sure what will happen.

You’ll rip off another episode and it will suck? Just spit-balling.

The moms are planing their own time with our young spartan Spy and soon with each other and their daughters. See ya.

I feel like this is ‘A Rose By Any Other Name’ all over again. An endless flood of sex scenes with random canon-inspired bits meant to glue it all together.


Still nothing new. If only the author could begin on his crazy list, maybe I’d feel just a bit entertained.

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Re: New Spy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sun Apr 01, 2018 12:01 am

I feel like this is ‘A Rose By Any Other Name’ all over again. An endless flood of sex scenes with random canon-inspired bits meant to glue it all together.
That comparison is frighteningly accurate if I say so; a stream of poorly written lemons with utterly asinine synonyms for body parts/fluids and has every named character be OOC for the sake of the author getting off. That aside, which fic would you say is worse?
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sun Apr 08, 2018 3:50 am

GorillaGamer wrote:
Sun Apr 01, 2018 12:01 am
That comparison is frighteningly accurate if I say so; a stream of poorly written lemons with utterly asinine synonyms for body parts/fluids and has every named character be OOC for the sake of the author getting off. That aside, which fic would you say is worse?
A Rose By Any Other Name, definitely. So far. That fanfic tried or at least pretended to do something with Batman, by having him be the author's self-insert wish-fulfilment stand-in, while including ridiculously bad baby kidnapping plots and Joker confrontations. Big stuff that the author basically just jerked off onto, rather than do it justice.

With this Totally Spies! fanfic, however, I have only gotten through to this 12th chapter, and I don't know yet how insane or insulting it might get. But with Sean being an original character and the slap-dash way this is all written, it's already apparent that the author doesn't write this in the universe's setting, as much as he pulls his masturbation-construed imaginings of these characters out from them, and have everything take place in the generous space between his brain and his dick. New Spy is bad, but somewhat less insulting.

And let's not pretend Totally Spies! didn't paint a target on it's own back here.

Anyway, let's get on with this author's rendition of 'The Little Slut Engine That Shouldn't'. Here's Chapter 12, Second mother added.

Chapter 12 Second mother added.

The author’s favorite equation. X + 1 = WHORES.

Sean waking up sees Clover still asleep next to him making him smile.

I’m sure the author thinks that somehow establishes an emotional link, but I have the same reaction to seeing a refreshing glass of water next to my bed in the morning, and to Sean these bitches are not so different from that.

Getting up he decided to take a shower since he was sure her mother wasn't here since they never saw her.

How constant is your sexual escapades that you never see the provider and owner of the house you live in? Do you just never sit down for dinner in your fap fever dream, author?

Little did he know Stella woke up and saw him walking to the shower naked and grinned.

"Time for my fun big boy."

The more those two words are repeated, I come closer to nicknaming either Sean or the author ‘Baby Dick’.

Stella said while she went into her daughters room and carefully placed some earmuffs over her ears so she couldn't hear what was about to happen and closed the door.

You know, if things got rowdy at the 0.0001% chance of her sexual advances being rejected.

Sean turned on the water as he stood under the shower head and sighed before he reached for the soap but a pair of large breasts pressed against his back making him smirk.

"Up for an early round already Clover?" Sean asked.

"Guess again." Stella said making him blink and turned around and saw Stella in the nude posing for him. "Like what you see big boy?" Stella said.

For someone slobbering at every walking vagina, you certainly don’t care to pay attention to anything beyond their usage, author. I don’t demand measurements, that’s a different ballpark of wrong, but I have to assume that every person is human by default, because you can’t even deign yourself to mention a skin tone, let alone a body contour.

"Uh yeah and somehow I cant say I'm shocked at this since Carmen has a thing for me to." Sean said making her giggle before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss.

I’m sorry, but did she just giggle at Sean stereotyping all lone mothers he knows by a sample size of one by essentially saying ‘I figured all you sluts were alike’?

"Really and what did you two do?" Stella asked using her left hand to stroke him.

"Went to a steam room for some private fun.

The most boring game of hide and seek as foreplay. I guess Stella’s turn-on is playing Twenty Questions.

Also since its clear I know where this is going you should know Clover Carmen and the girls are all intimate with me and each other."

”Please sign the dotted line on the harem contract. Every participant must be cleared of any believable doubt or realistic second thought, so as not to disturb the author’s fragile fantasies, because that would make this scenario totally unrealistic, of course.”

Seriously author, you couldn’t be more eye-rollingly cringey if you directed porn stars to nudge and wink at each other when shooting a plumber scene.

Sean said making her giggle.

Giggle counter, because you deserve one, author.

"Honey I already know that since I did my own research on your people and it makes me more turned on that way."

Fucking hell, a stereotype stereotyping the stereotype who stereotyped her first. Inception couldn’t produce this many layers of abject irony.

Stella said before she blinked when she felt a pair of breasts on her back and turned around and saw Clover naked as her and smiled at her mother.

"Well that works for me since now I can do this." Clover said kissed her neck softly making Stella moan out in bliss before she gasped as Sean played with her hips.

"Mmmm thats it you two play with me."

”Do what the author just said you were doing.” – Stock lemon dialogue #69.

Stella said before She gasped as she was forced to her hands and knees and saw Sean's hard cock in her face and grinned before she slowly licked it making Sean groan out holding her head softly.

Okay, ‘big boy’, here’s a question for you. How much of a midget do you need to be, in order to have a woman on all fours fellating your dick?

"Mmm lets see what you taste like." Clover said going on her back and went underneath her mothers pussy and licked her lips seeing her wet sex. Clover placed her mouth over it making Stella gasp lightly before moaning out and placed his cock in her mouth and she widen her eyes when he grabbed her head and moved it back and fourth on it making her moan in joy.

One paragraph, author. Just one paragraph without a grammatical mistake, skipped word, or misspelling, is that too much to ask?

"Thats it mommy." Clover said as she licked her pussy slowly before shoving her tongue inside making Stella gasp around his cock. Stella was enjoying the treatment she was getting from her daughter and now new lover. She managed to hold herself up on one hand while the second played with his balls. Sean groaned out as she toyed with his balls before he grunted and thrusted deep into her throat making her eyes widen and moaned as he came inside her throat.

When don’t they moan? When does their eyes not widen? I feel the lengths of these lemons could be cut in half if the author stopped repeating himself.

He pulled out and she coughed a little before letting out a shuddering sigh of sexual bliss as she came on her daughters mouth and panted in bliss.

Okay, now you can’t even pretend to not be aware of your self-parodied usage of the ‘b’ word, author.

"Mmmm delicious." Clover said licking her lips clean.

"Come here you." Stella said pulling her up to her lap and had her stomach on her legs and spanked her ass.

Good luck guessing who did what to whom in that pronoun contortion act.

Clover moaned from each smack to her ass making Stella grin before she placed a finger inside her ass making her gasp and whimper slightly.

Oh, wow, light lesbian ass-play and spanking, it’s not like we’ve seen that for a couple of chapters already.

Clover let out a disappointed sigh as her mother pulled out before she looked up and grinned seeing Sean's large cock.

"Mmm since you've had him all night its my turn." Stella said before she was picked up and had her front facing Clover while his cock was aimed at her ass. "Ooooh going for my tightest hole are you?"

Yeah, since your ear must be pretty loose after your brain got scooped out through it.

Stella asked before she yelled out as he shoved it inside her ass and moaned in bliss. Clover grinned and stood on her knees and placed her mouth on her mothers pussy making her moan loudly.

"Now for the real fun."

Well, that’s a tall order, considering so far this has all felt neither real nor fun.

Clover said shoving her tongue inside her pussy making Stella moan as she had her ass fucked hard by her lover.

"Oh god yes fuck me both of you!" Stella said in bliss.

"Hey wait don't move I want to try something." Clover said getting out of the shower and back into her room.

Why are you even still in the shower? It’s not like the author lingers on you bathing for cleanliness sake, but I forgot you were even there, since the author hasn’t even mentioned water since the lemon started.

Sean kissed her neck lovingly making Stella moan softly as Clover came back and she widen her eyes when she saw her with a pink strap on.

"Where did you get that young lady?" Stella asked.

It’s a standard W.H.O.O.P. issue gadget that shoots lasers from the tip and doubles as an extendable camera. Do anyone still reading or writing this even remember this is supposed to be a Totally Spies! Fanfic?

"Oh Alex gave it to me just incase you had a thing for him not we can both fuck you."

Because every sex scene feels so amazingly unscripted when every participant anticipated every instance before it occurred.

Clover said thrusting into her pussy making Stella moan loudly before Clover pulled her into a kiss. Sean thrusted back into her while Stella wrapped her legs around Clover.

Stella moaned in bliss as she was fucked in both holes.

How much bliss are we at? Go get a thesaurus for more than sexual organs, author.

'Oh god its like my old college days all over again only its more hotter because I'm getting fucked by a younger man and my daughter of all people.' Stella thought in bliss as she enjoyed getting pounded.

But was it as blissful back then, that’s what we all need to know.

"I think my mom is about to explode here. So lets make it wild here."

Calling the female orgasm an explosion seems wild enough, I think.

Clover said sucking on her breasts making Stella moan louder while Sean turned her head to face him and kissed her deeply making her moan before she gasped and felt herself about to cum hard.

"Oh god I'm about to cum fuck me both of you fuck me like the whore I am now!"

Do you even know what a whore is, author? It’s more than just a nebulous, self-degrading word spoken out loud for the sole reason that it turns you on when someone says it. And what does that make Sean at this point?

Stella yelled out in lust making Clover giggle as she sucked on her tits.

"Then cum for your lovers then mommy." Clover said kissing her deeply making Stella let go and yelled into her mouth before she came hard and her eyes were held lidded losing her energy already.

Do you want to try that sentence again, and maybe have it make sense next time?

"Mark me." Stella said making Sean smirk before he opened his mouth and bites down on her neck making her scream out in pain but was silenced by her daughter who kissed her deeply. Once he was done he pulled back and licked her neck. "Thank you both." She said before she blinked.

Amazing. It's almost like everyone has the exact same kinks, the exact same experiences, and the exact same impressions of what sex is supposed to be and incorporate. Every drool-drenched detail you add with your spank-stamps only makes all these bimbos more identical, author!

"What?" Clover asked before a pair of arms wrapped around her chest. She looked back and saw Alex Sam Donna and Carmen nude as her.

I know this is Beverly Hills, but how fucking big can this shower be?!

"Well someone sure is having fun." Carmen said walking to Stella and kissed her lovingly making her moan.

"Did you walk here naked?" Stella asked making the girls smirk.

"No I drove us here naked and a good thing to I was preparing to seduce you to sleep with all of us but now it looks like I don't have to." Carmen said.

Could you perhaps start reeling in your warped, alternate sex dimension overlay for this universe, author? I’m pretty sure even Jerry has started to believe everyone got hit by a mind-altering device.

Hours later

The author rubbed himself raw, so here’s a time skip.

Stella and all the other girls were passed out all over the bedroom with sexual smiles on their faces. Sean smirked at his work as he laid on the couch with Carmen and Stella on his chest.

"Now that was fun." Carmen said as it was night out.

"Mmmm perfect." Stella said in bliss.

Sean smirked as he got up and picked the girls up and placed them in the bed.

Enjoy the stains, you unwashed louts.

Carmen held her daughter to her breasts as did Stella doing the same with Clover.

"Now we just need to get Gabriella to join us and it will be perfect."

You mean to say that the author will in a future chapter write the word ‘bliss’ more than just eight times, right?

Carmen said as she kissed her daughters forehead before the all went to sleep with content smiles on their faces.

Authors note: Cloud4012 gets credit for this sex chapter.

A guy who has favorited more than 800 M-rated stories? No wonder this chapter felt stock and unoriginal, even for this fanfic.

Next chapter we add Gabriella to the harem in a very daring way.

Missionary would be daring for how much it would be a breath of fresh air.

Also I'm thinking of having a rather daring chapter of the girls working at a strip club thats just for the harem group tell me what you think on that. See ya.

It would be a step up from the decadent pit of depravity you are having everyone uncaringly wallow through in their own filth. At least a strip club has some standards put upon it to make it what it is. Not that I expect your fantasy-addled, shut-in envisioning of women to do even that enough justice.

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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sun Apr 15, 2018 11:07 am

One more lemon, and then supposedly we'll return to the betrayed source material. On we must go. Here's Chapter 13, final mother.

Chapter 13 final mother

Are we sure this is a lemon and not a boss battle?

Gabriella was invited to Stella's for a little talk. She knocked on the door and Stella opened it in only a small robe.

"Oh you came come on in." Stella said having her walk in.

"So what did you want to talk about..." Gabriella said but stopped as she turned around and saw Stella taking off her robe leaving her naked. "Um what are you doing?"

Resist them Gabriella! Run before Patient Zero Inches arrives and infects you with the slut strain, too!

Gabriella asked before she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist and turned and saw Carmen nude as well smiling at her.

"We just wanted to have some fun like we all used to back then." Carmen said slowly kissing her neck making her moan slightly before she gave in as Stella pulled off her her shirt and her pants with ease.

Ah, yes, I can see how this was supposedly the ‘daring’ chapter where she would be introduced to the harem in a ‘daring’ way, author. You dared repeat yourself for the fourth time in how you initiate lesbian sex scenes.

"Remember the old days when we were so wild?" Carmen said kissing her neck making her moan softly.

"Yeah I remember when we dared you to go streaking during the night and the time we went skinny dipping in the ocean."

You call that wild? The first sounds like an warmup fraternity haze, and the other is not even illegal on any beach in my country.

Gabriella said moaning as Stella pulled off her bra and licked her tits.

"I remember when you put body pain on yourself and walked around the campus and everyone thought you were dressed and not naked."

I think the pain helped her through that, yeah.

Stella said as she went down lower and pulled her thong off with her teeth and licked her lips seeing her wet pussy. She placed her mouth over it and Gabriella moaned softly as she did.

You know, author, you ever only depict cunnilingus as a lips being placed over labia, and tongue-drillings, nothing in-between. Do yourself a favor and look up some uncensored porn for once.

"Wait lets show her our little surprise." Carmen said as Stella stood up and both gently grabbed her hands and led her upstairs. Gabriella heard soft moaning and Carmen opened the door to Stella's room and Gabriella widen her eyes in shock and excitement as she saw Sam getting fucked by Sean cowgirl style while Alex kissed her neck softly and Clover and Donna sucked on her tits making Sam moan louder.

They were all dressed like the Teletubbies for some reason, but Gabriella didn’t seem to take notice.

"Like what you see your little girl being fucked from the man we all love and her friends?

Excuse me? Love? At least Alex, Sam, and Clover can be excused by knowing the guy and sharing their job with him, but all he did was fuck you. You have barely even had conversations. No wonder none of you seem to have a husband around.

Sam came by the other night with Donna completely naked meaning she has your daring side for running around public naked."

They all do, author, you pathetic self-plagiarist.

Carmen said kissed her neck softly licking her flesh.

Gabriella smiled softly before she saw Sam arch back and scream loudly as she came hard and she shuddered in bliss as he came inside her.

"Oh Sammy." Gabriella said making Sam open her eyes and smiled at her mom.

"Mommy care to join us we've been at this for hours now."

Rug burns and bed sores all around.

Sam said blowing her a kiss making her smile as she and the other two mothers went to them and Sam moaned as her mother kissed her neck softly.

"Hmmm you need a lesson young lady."

What are the chances that grammar is on the curriculum?

Gabriella said as she shoved her down. "Stella do you still have my old toys?" Gabriella asked smirking.

"Yes in my room drawer and some new ones in that bag."

It’s this non-descript, ever-present bag that you can grab whatever you like from it, labelled “The Author’s Ass’.

Stella said kissing Clover on her breasts who moaned softly.

"Ooooh what kind of toys?" Sam asked shaking her ass at her mother who smiled and smacked it making her moan.

"Oh you'll see in fact girls why don't we punish our girls together for being such sluts?"

The best orgies, you have to admit, are the hypocritical ones.

Gabriella said getting giggles from them as they stood up and went with her.

"Oh this should be good." Donna said licking Sean's cock making him chuckle as he played with her hair. The mothers came back with various toys from whips nipple clamps breast pumps dildos paddles and tons of others.

Oh, how you enrich my life with your amazing knowledge of sexual toys, author. I especially like how your imagination ran so wild you had no commas to distinguish shit with, and then came up short so abruptly you forgot to mention a ‘to’ to the ‘from’ you prefixed your list with.

"Wow you really were freaky back then mom." Sam said amused.

"Oh you have no idea. You want to tell her the time you dominated me and Stella for a whole week?" Carmen asked making her giggle.

What, you mean like what supposedly was going to happen with Donna, yet nothing ever came of that? It’s like the author is already slipping up on his harem list.

"Maybe some other time but for now." Gabriella said putting on an electric strap on to herself. "My baby needs to be punished." Gabriella said as she took the paddle and breast pumps.

Sam moaned as she was forced on her back and her mother placed the pumps on her breasts and used it.

Stellar depiction, author, spared no expense on telling us how they are using these magnificent toys, by telling us they are using them. Is it just that you don’t know how breast pumps work?

She moaned slightly in pain as the cups started to suck on her breasts.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Simple seeing if you can give me some of your own milk." Gabriella said before Sam gasped as that happened just now as a small amount of white liquid came from her nipples.

Scratch that, you don’t know how breasts work, author! Screw it, it’s pretty obvious you don’t know how women work in general.

"Mmm I remember when you were just a baby and you'd suck on my breasts for hours." Gabriella said as she got closer to Sam and had her breasts in her face. "Go on suck on them again baby." Gabriella said making Sam smirk before she placed her left tit in her mouth and sucked on it while her mother pumped her own milk.

At least I can feel somewhat reassured that this isn't some baby factory fantasy like certain other fanfics. The degenerates who write those can at least be trusted to know what the point of lactation is.

Sam moaned in disappointment as she took off the pumps and had a small glass in her hand.

"Mmm not much but your still growing." Gabriella said gulping down her milk and shuddered in sexual bliss as she swallowed. "Oh my you tasted delicious."

Gross. Could you at least go around and milk the other cows so their breasts don’t go into painful swellings and health issues, since the author think they’ve been producing these before they are even considered adults?

Gabriella said and gasped as she felt Sam sucking on her own milk. This went on for a few minutes before she pulled her breasts back.

"Mmmm." Sam moaned out before she was flipped on her stomach. She was about to say something but gasped when her mother smacked her ass hard making her hold back her scream as Gabriella smacked her ass so hard the noise was heard form the entire house.

You are in a seven man orgy, do you think that shit is quiet?

Sam panted in bliss and pain as her ass was glowing red.

"Now for the fun part." Gabriella said as she turned on the vibrator and thrusted into her sex making Sam gasp in excitement.

"Yes fuck me like a bitch!" Sam moaned out as she was fucked hard by her mother who thrusted into her violently.

"Scream for me you little slut scream for your mother." Gabriella said smacking her back making Sam scream loudly as she was fucked by her mother.

We get it, author, she’s getting fucked by her mother. You couldn’t be repeating yourself any more if you were Dorothy using her ruby slippers.

No one was worried anyone would hear them since the whole place was sound proof.

Yeah, let us just ignore the previous paragraph, so the author’s pathetically cobbled fantasy can take that extra step while he goes ‘nuh-uh, that’s not a problem because of what I just made up’. You were the kid on the playground no one wanted to play with more than once, weren’t you, author?

Gabriella pulled on her hair making Sam moan louder from all the pain she was getting. "You are such a whore Sammy what happened to the little girl I raised to be normal?" Gabriella said teasing her.

She was substituted with the author's unreasonable, sexual projection in his quest to not only jerk it to this ten-times source-removed figment, but to share and encourage others to get off on his personal fantasy that essentially comes down to identically kink-confused stick figures wearing nametags.

"She grew up to be like her mommy a complete slutty whore for her friends and boyfriend!" Sam yelled out before she gasped and came hard and trembled in sexual bliss.

"Mmmm yes you did."

All I’ve read so far has been bimbos thinking it poignant and important to grind against each other while stating the obvious. It’s like the author thought anyone couldn’t follow along otherwise, which might actually be true.

Gabriella said kissing her daughter in the center of her neck lovingly.


Yes. Meanwhile. A few feet away. The only reason I don’t call you ignorant, author, is because ignorance can be helped.

Clover moaned in bliss as her mother placed electric clamps on her tits. Stella smiled at her daughter and kissed her lovingly before she put on a special strap on. This one when she pressed a button controller moved around wildly.

It’s cool you ruffled through your sister’s drawers and discovered something new, author, but you just described functions that exist in about no less than four different types of genital stimulators. Could you describe to me a blank wall even if you tried?

"Get ready honey this is going to be wild." Stella said shoving into her making Clover moan loudly as she felt the fake cock move around her insides wildly.

"Oooooh what is this thing?" Clover said moaning from the thing inside her and the nipple clamps.

"Oh something I bought recently now lets have some fun." Stella said as she thrusted into her daughter wildly and smiled as she felt her breasts pushing up against hers, wildly.

"Mmmm your breasts are kissing mine sweetie."

You already forgot about the nipple clamps, didn’t you, author? Or is that just extra enjoyable pain on top for you?

Stella said before she kissed her lovingly making Clover moan as well as she jumped up and wrapped her arms and legs around her. Stella saw her eyes widening meaning she was close making her smirk and shoved her on the ground and held her like a while barrel

Wheelbarrow! Unless you just created your own original fetish, she’s holding her like a barrow on a wheel, numb nuts.

by her legs and thrusted into her fast.

"Mommy I'm about to explode!" Clover said gritting her teeth together.

Combust and end everyone’s misery, especially mine!

"Then cum honey." Stella said smacking her ass hard making Clover let out a scream of bliss as she came hard.

Something was about to happen – and then it did! Stellar narrative, author, with the same quality and climax as expected of every one of your stories.

"Good girl." Stella said kissing her neck softly.

Carmen and Alex were having their own fun as Carmen shoved a dildo in her ass making her whimper slightly from the size.

But without a ‘meanwhile’ to separate this event from the previous one, how will this scene flow as naturally as that dildo did?

Carmen then pulled her up and wrapped her arms around her waist as she held her upside down and used her mouth to pull out the dildo.

Her, her, her, I might as well think Carmen did all this on her own to herself.

"Now for my treat." Carmen said as she shoved her tongue into her pussy making Alex moan softly as her mother ate her out. Carmen moaned as she tasted her daughters juices and then pulled out and shoved her tongue into her ass making Alex gasp lightly and moaned in bliss.


"Need a hand?" Donna asked as she stood in front of Alex and placed her mouth over her pussy making Alex whimper more as she was getting double tongue fucked from her mother and female lover.

That’s kind of you, Donna, but you haven’t even had your sex scene with Sean go through yet, let alone said hello to Carmen for the first time.

"Girls I think I'm about to cum!" Alex yelled.

"Then cum honey." Carmen said as she slowly licked her butt cheeks and Alex yelled out as she came like a fountain and sprayed both of them.

A mother states her daughter should come while doing something to them and then the daughter comes. Right down to the same sentence structure. You can’t even stop repeating yourself within the same orgy, author!

Donna and Carmen kissed each other clean before Carmen set Alex down softly as she breathed in bliss before Donna pulled her up and kissed her lovingly and she jumped into her arms wrapped her arms and legs around her.

The sound of Gabriella moaning in sexual bliss caught their attention as Sean had her on her stomach and thrusted into her hard.

Oh, right, Sean has to claim his milf and complete the set, brains not included.

"Yes thats it fuck me like a whore." Gabriella said as she enjoyed getting fucked so hard as the others watched.

"Oh mommy." Sammy said sitting in front of her face and had her pussy near her making her smile and pulled her closer and placed her mouth over her pussy and Sam moaned softly as she did this.

If you didn’t catch on to it, moan – with 25 of them so far, means pleasure or pain, or whatever the author wants people to think about in order to be impressed with his writing. Don’t believe me? Find a single place in this chapter where we get told the characters feel anything than each other.

Donna getting in on this pulled her down and placed her pussy over her mouth making Sam smirk as she licked her making Donna moan.

Gabriella was moaning in bliss

And that was the tenth ‘bliss’ in this chapter. Fucking called it!

as she was fucked and licked her daughter before her eyes widen and she came hard as did he and Sam and Donna came as well before the girls fell down out of energy.

"Well this was fun." Carmen said.

Are you saying that to convince me, or yourselves?

"Yup." Sean said as he laid down to recover his energy.

Authors note: YEESSSS! Finally all three mothers are in the harem.

Well, congratulations on your milestone, author. It’s not like you made it any more convincing than had you fulfilled that goal in the first chapter of this fanfic.

Now next chapter we get back into the episodes. Next chapter Spy versus spy. See ya

The episode title is ‘Spies vs. Spies’, you dilettante, but you’ve already had these chicks explode, so what do I know?

Edit: Damn, I almost forgot this thing.

445 sluts on the wall, 445 sluts. This author's thirst can't tell the last from the first, 444 sluts on the wall.
Last edited by ConcernedGamer on Mon Apr 16, 2018 1:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: New Spy

Post by GorillaGamer » Mon Apr 16, 2018 10:03 am

Huzzah! Dragonlord0 finally stops dicking about and gets back to the plot that he doesn't care about. Can't wait to see how he messes this up.
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
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Re: New Spy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sun Apr 22, 2018 8:24 am

GorillaGamer wrote:
Mon Apr 16, 2018 10:03 am
Huzzah! Dragonlord0 finally stops dicking about and gets back to the plot that he doesn't care about. Can't wait to see how he messes this up.
He does it in typical fashion, by insulting any reader with a working brain cell, and then exploiting his own injected ego stroking, of course.

Finally, we are done drowning in the pointless sex scenes. Because that's what sex scenes are typically, honestly. When have you seen a sex scene actually further a plot? Sure, you can tell me it is supposed to confirm or be a sign of the culmination of a relationship between characters, but don't try and lie to yourself and think that's the motivation behind any of these bargain-bin contenders for the anti-kamasutra. Here's Chapter 14, spy versus spy

chapter 14 spy versus spy

Sean and the girls were in a sub looking for anything that might cause a pipeline to explode.

That depends. Are you fucking it right now?

Recently power plants and anything that provides power to the world have been blown up by someone or something so Jerry sent them to investigate.

"Uh guys does that count as weird?" Alex asked as she pointed to some mechanical spider that has a timer on it.

"Uh yeah it does move." Sean said taking control and tried to grab that thing but couldn't.

Come on, author, you are indirectly yet definitely demanding people to be watching the whole episode alongside your shitty transcript. You can’t even mention the glass bottom of the sub they use to discover the spider through, let alone the sub’s arms or anything else related to the episode itself at lengths.

It then got on the pipeline. "Uh oh." Sean said before it was shot by something. They looked outside and saw three divers one grabbed the mechanical spider and placed it in a trench while the other one pushed a giant rock over it as it exploded.

"What the hell?" Donna asked.

I know that, as the resident back-up ho the author-avatar brings along everywhere for no reason, you need to confirm you exist, Donna, but watch your language. Outside of sex scenes this is still a kid’s show.

They soon made their way up to the surface on the boat they came on with.

"Thanks for the help but who are you guys?" Sean asked jumping down. The three divers took off their head gear and they were three women

Because their hour glass figures up until this point had completely passed the author’s dedicated notice. Honestly, man, why the fuck do you still pretend you have any interest in writing any of this canon-leech filler? Oh, right, filling your harem at the source.

one blond hair and blue eyes. One with raven hair and green eyes and the lats one had red hair and brown eyes.

Characters established, we’ll never hear anything about them ever again besides their names and the fact that they have genitals and kinks. I can’t even suggest you could think them mere color swabs of the regular Spies, because the author can’t do any better for those three alone!

"I'm Pam this is Alice and Crimson we're spies from WOOHP." Pam said shocking them.

"Say what? Donna asked.


"I cant believe its you. This is too good to be true." Jerry said.

”Actual normal people, I thought the author had left me as the last one!”

"Let me get this straight you used to have our jobs?" Alex asked.

"Until we were captured by the villain on our last mission." Alice said.

"Edison." Jerry said remembering that name.

"He held us prisoner for seven years." Crimson said.

"Judging by those..." Was as far as Clover got before Sean and Sam elbowed her.

And lets not forget the occasional, momentary, but entirely pointless alterations bearing no effect on anything at all, meant to pretend the injected character influences the reality he snuck into. I should write a book about self-inserts at this point.

"Don't be rude." Sean said.

"We looked everywhere for you girls. And when we didn't hear from you we assumed the worst." Jerry said.

Oh, don’t be silly, Jerry. Sean didn’t exist up until the start of this fanfic.

"Well we're back now Jerry its going to be just like old times." Pam said.

"I was hoping you'd say that." Jerry said.

"Hold it what happened to Edison?" Sean asked seeing some unanswered questions.

You steal all the vocal exchanges to rob your blowup dolls of any influence in their own show, and you don’t even ask if any of these women needs therapy after seven years of imprisonment? Right, I forgot I was speaking to Captain Cockholm Syndrome.

"We were able to escape but we weren't able to capture him." Crimson said.

"And how did end up on the pipeline exactly? I find it rather odd your there just at the right time." Sean said getting the girls on his team to agree till and alarm went off.

"We've got another emergency this time its a hydroelectric plant!" Jerry said.

"Yeah yeah we're on it." Sean said.

"Actually this would be a terrific opportunity to re assimilate Pam and her crew." Jerry said.

I think Jerry has gotten wise to the fact, that the sooner he sacrifices more bitches to the author’s alter of smut, the sooner this fanfic will come to an end.

"Why don't you all go on the mission together?" Jerry said. The girls all agreed and left while Sean stayed. "Is there a problem Sean?" Jerry asked.

"Yeah keep a close eye on them. Something isn't right I just know it." Sean said running off while Jerry looked confused.

I mean, why would Jerry have reason to be confused, when the author can’t even justify his blatant and impactless foresight with the word ‘hunch’.


"We'll check out the hydro-infuser sector you guys take the lower level." Pam said.

"Whatever." Sean said as his team followed him.

"What was that about being rude?" Clover asked in his change in behavior.

Color me impressed, author. A setup and follow up that you crafted by your own hand. By having Sean interrupt a fashion joke and reminding us about it a moment afterwards. Well, crawl before you can walk and all that.

"Something isn't right." Sean said till he spotted the same mechanical spider from before. "Over there." Sean said till Alice came in and kicked it in the water next to them as it exploded and they fell into the water.


I know I repeat myself a lot on this with the author’s lackluster repeating of the canon, but would you even get the idea that this was supposed to be a death fake-out from the mention of how they ‘fell into the water’?

Jerry was given the bad news by his old spies and was writing a letter to the parents when.

"Jerry." Sean said walking in while Sam and Alex carried Donna who looked to have a broken foot.

Because the author ran out of ideas how to make her existence relevant otherwise. And Clover died, apparently. I was actually joking, but it turns out her name doesn’t appear in this chapter any longer.

"Your alive. Oh thank goodness. The girls said they couldn't find you." Jerry said.

"I hate to break it to you but your old team is lying to you. They kicked the bomb right at us." Sean said.

"I'm sure it was an accident.

And the self-insert states an otherwise canon-derailing sentence that will be disregarded as if it was a non-sequitur, likely just for a future excuse to have been right all along when the author lets the canon unfold as if undisturbed.

In any event I have wonderful news for you. Your retired. My original spies have taken your place." Jerry said.

"What?" Sean said. "Is that what we are to you expendable once one team goes missing or dies you get a new one?" Sean asked angered.

"No of course not. Its a done deal now you all get a chance to live regular lives." Jerry said.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Sean asked kicking his desk making Jerry jump in alarm. "FUCK YOU!" Sean yelled kicking the door down and carried Donna with him.

Author, pack your impotent, authority-butthurt, ego-tripping, twelve-year-old mindset back into your pants and stop having Sean pull a tantrum as if he’s justified. The show is currently having, what I as an adult can recognize to be subtle continuity nods and weight to it. Jerry was in the middle of writing the spies’ eulogy, having failed doing so four times already, when they walked in. Before him sits photos of them framed on his desk, outnumbering but also sharing space with the old spies. The man just believed them to have died on duty, as teenagers who had on occasion complained how their duty came in the way of being regular teens. He has for hours had to come to term with their plausible death, accepted that his old and more experienced spies are back and able do their duty once more in an organization demanding to have operatives to save the world from dangers that cares not for the lives they take. And the immediate words out of his mouth upon discovering that the girls are alive is to say they are retired. You don’t retire the dead, shithead. Jerry currently has no need to put people he thought lost back out into the fray. It’s subtle, perhaps so because it’s only there to cause conflict, but inference of motivation like this is a mile above your piss-poor depictions. Since you want to sit there and whack off to children’s cartoons, the least you could do would be to not deliberate do injustice to your spank material, just so you can get off on it in other ways than the sexual ones. Now excuse me, I’m going to try and make the rest of this insulting mess a bit fun, having just been more genuine with the show than you could ever be, from analyzing only ten seconds of it.

"Oh dear." Jerry said.

"Give him a couple days to cool off but can you lend us a plane ours is in the shop so we cant go to the Seminar." Sam said.

What seminar are you talking about Sam? Perhaps the one the canon would have mentioned had the author not shat upon it?

"Of course have fun at the seminar." Jerry said.


Sean with the girls in the plane minus Donna since her leg needed time to heal.

This grammar makes for the worst game of Clue yet.

"Those girls are not who they say they are. This is the location the GPS says they are at." Sean said as they walked around.

It’s not like the place has a name or anything, author. How about paying attention to your YouTube video instead of looking up porn on the side?

"This place is just a big unless piece of rock." Alex said kicking the ground which was a bad idea as a giant hole was made and they fell into a water stream.

Well, they fell into water, they’re dead, obviously, so let’s cut back to Jerry again.

"What the? Wait this must be where they were held for 7 years." Sean said before they hide away from the original spies in bathing suits walked by and sat down in some chairs.

What, in the water stream, or some empty void you’re now in? You might as well start to write this in script format, author, because I describe locations in more details by accident.

"To bad the new spy guy isn't with us he'd make things more interesting." Alice said.

"True he was handsome." Pam said making Sean's eyebrow twitch in annoyance.

"Fuck." Sean said softly.

I’m sorry, are you getting annoyed that you are being objectified? Oh woe is me, someone desires me, is what you are saying? This is exactly how Sam, Alex and Clover talked about Sean in the first chapter, author, you ironically hypocritical idiot.

"In time girls he will be joining you." A man said coming out of the shadows. They assumed this was Edison.

"So thats Edison." Sean said.

Guys, I think he might be Edison, but let’s ask the author again, just in case.

"With the power plants now destroyed soon I shall control the income of power to the world." Edison said.

"And those Junior spies cant do anything makes me think WOOHP's standards have lowered if their that weak." Crimson said.

"FUCKING EXCUSE ME!" Sean yelled in anger and he jump kicked her away.

Be honest with me, author, did that even sound the least bit impressive inside your head? Sean sounds like he just got bad service at Walmart.

"What the how did?" Pam tried to say but Sean gave her an uppercut. Alice tried to hold him down but Sean head buts her making her dizzy before he kicked her away into a wall. He would have done more had he and the girls not been shocked by Edison.

I see the author reigned in his Spartan curb stomp battle in favor of the canon, by half-assed making up an event that won’t bruise Sean’s hand-to-hand combat prowess, the insecure dink.

Minutes later

"Why did you do it why betray everyone for him?" Sean asked.

Isn’t that what I should be asking every bimbo when joining the harem?

"Its not that simple Spartan. When I first met the girls years ago I saw they were wasting their time fighting for good so I implanted these into their necks to give me full control over them." Edison said showing the chips on their necks.

It seems not even your harem wrangling dick is that original in-universe, Sean.

"Why are you doing this anyway what do you gain by destroying all the power plants?" Sam asked.

"Simple so I can supply the amount of solar power. My machine can control the plants rotation so whoever wants that power has to buy time from me." Edison said.

Yeah, the guy has a machine the size of an oil rig that can change the Earth’s rotation, just so he can monopolize solar energy after eliminating all other power plants. I repeat. He has a machine that alters Earth’s rotation that he uses for the single purpose of selling solar energy. Just skip the power plant step, dude, you’ve got a doomsday extortion device!!

"Speaking of which its time to start the auction." Edison said as he and the girls left as they winked at him.

"Fucking asshole." Sean said before looking up and the girls shrieked seeing a big mechanical spider. Sean reached into his pocket and got his phone. "So help me god."

I’m sure if you put out a few more ‘fuck’s and ‘asshole’s, whatever god you think worships you will come right along, Sean.

Sean said getting Jerry on the line.

"Hello spies good to hear you again." Jerry said.

"Jerry listen to me." Sean tried to say but.

"Wait a second your not the real spies this is for Legitimate spies only." Jerry said hanging up.

"YOU FAT FUCK!" Sean said pulling out a knife and cut the web around him before smashing the spider and freed the girls. "When I get my hands on him." Sean said in anger.

Give me your honest opinion here, what does Sean remind you of more? A regular level-headed super spy ala James Bond, or a raving howler monkey that uses any excuse to screech and throw around his vocal fecal matter? The immature creature that produced him even thinks just having Sean finally decide to solve his situation, by pulling any regular thing from his pocket while speaking in all-caps, is impressive in the least. The girls had to use a cryo-spray to get out of this, for fuck sake.


The good spies managed to get to Edison and freed Pan Alice and Crimson just as WOOHP arrived.

Because why would we want excitement and action in a Totally Spies! fanfic? It’s almost like the author has become self-aware of how Sean would just win by default anyway and skipped it.

"I do hope you all can accept my dear apology your spy status is back in the system." Jerry said before he gasped in pain as Sean punched him in the stomach. The girls and other WOOHP agents were shocked by this.

"FUCK YOU! We tried to warn you twice that something was wrong and you completely ignored us. As of right now we quit." Sean said getting the girls to nod.

And the bowling-pin brained pin-ups are left to silently bob their heads to the tune of the author’s flexing ego, having never complained once out loud!

"Wait we can work something out." Jerry said but they boarded a helicopter and left.

Because becoming a spy at the snap of his own fingers wasn’t enough, now Sean has to be rehired with benefits before he allows WOOHP to overcome the incredible loss his departure now causes.


Donna sighed relaxed as her leg was fully healed.

It takes a minimum of six weeks to heal a broken foot, author. I didn’t know you started your crossover early enough to turn Donna into a Wolverine clone.

"So thats it huh no more being a spy?" Alex asked.

Oh, don’t you attempt to get my hopes up.

"Do you want to work with someone who wont even listen to reason? Not only that he thinks we're expendable since he didn't even ask if we wanted to stay when his old team took our place."

I’ve ranted on this grating idiocy already, I only wish I had some proper words to sum up this accusatory backsass. Actually, those two will do for now.

Sean said punching a punching bag that was made in the room that Carmen put up for him.

Just then Pam Alice and Crimson walked in.

"The hell do you want?" Sean asked not even looking at them as he continued to punch the bag.

Could you at least turn your head to learn who arrived, so it wasn’t painfully obvious you expected specifically these people to walk in for their prepped groveling session?

"Look Jerry's sorry about what happened he wants to make up for his mistake is there anything he can do to have you back?" Pam asked. The girls all had something in mind.

"No now tell him..." Sean tried to say but Alex walked up to him and whispered something in his ear making him blink and look at her for a second before smirking. "Alright theres one thing he can do to make it up for him. But first heres a question. How big is his wallet since he's going to be paying for something for us." Sean said.

Covering your expected indecent exposure lawsuits ahead of time, I see.

"HUH?" The three original spies said confused.

"What do you want?" Pam asked.

"Simple a mansion built near the beach with certain rooms and things installed no questions asked." Alex said.

I thought you were a prince, Sean. What has kept your lazy, couch-slumming ass from getting an orgy mansion before now? What’s that? The hack author only first now thought it up? Figures.

"Is that all?" Alice asked.

"Oh and he has to let Carla Wong out of the jail cell she's in since the deal was once we got a bigger place she could come out." Sean said not forgetting one of his lovers.

I’m surprised he even remembered, but hey, the condition of Carla being imprisoned until they found a place away from the spies’ parents was addressed real quick once they joined the harem, wasn’t it?

"Uh thats going to take a while." Alice said.

"Till its built we're not working for him." Sean said smirking.


"Why am I not surprised?" Jerry said rubbing his temples in stress.

"Sorry Jerry but was their condition." Pam said.

"Very well I'll get started on it." Jerry said.

Author, the old spies have yet to quit due to your intricate dick-driven idiocy, meaning it’s back to square zero of the girls being considered retired. You pretend you have Jerry in a vice when you couldn’t even grasp a plotline.

Authors note: Sorry no sex scene.

Really? I could have sworn someone got screwed. Maybe it was me.

Now the girls in the harem have more room for their more personal kinks. See ya next time.

As if elbow room has even been a consideration for you up until now. This is because you can’t pull the next series of kinks out from a bag, isn’t it?


I think the author is going to need more than a mansion for this list, if he ever bothers picking up his own slack.

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