Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

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StabbyKobold
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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by StabbyKobold » Mon Sep 03, 2018 4:22 pm

Hey Stabby, there’s that Satanic Panic you brought up a while ago. Talk about a neat coincidence.
Egads, the villains have become self-aware. And now they collude to employ horny nerds in the fight against the Pokémon fangames. How frightening.

The Metal Slug Attack thing came somewhat out of left field. How many community controversies and critiques does the author intend to draw into his Yugioh fanfic? Speaking of which, I wonder if the upcoming duel will be the same "you laugh, you lose" type of duel that Missy was given - it's usually how I predict the outcomes, since I don't know how the game works.

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GorillaGamer
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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sat Sep 15, 2018 6:35 am

@StabbyKobold: I honestly have no idea how many controversies the author’s going to throw in his fic, but I’m sure you’ll get your answer about the upcoming duel in this chapter.

Sorry for the long wait, I had some technical issues with my laptop and I just had it fixed the other day. I’d say this chapter should make up for it, but I’m getting second thoughts after reading it. Oh boy, not only does it have another “amazing” duel, but it has the author’s pathetic attempts at erotica.

No more beating around the bush, let’s delve into this sticky hole already.


Previously, Astolfo’s group got finished finalizing their decks while Titania plans on going out with Amaria and Julia. Meanwhile, some of the traitors had finished concocting a wicked scheme to ensure their victory.

Warning: There will be a lemon in this chapter.


How nice of Rider of Black to warn us about our imminent demise.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 5: Corporate Giants VS Dinosaurs!

The next day:

San Francisco: MS Waifu Army Headquarters


The group of traitors had begun a meeting with Elysion, the leader of the MS Waifu Army and her top two lieutenants, Alma and Amber. However the trio hadn’t arrived yet so the traitors got comfortably and began digging into the complimentary snacks.

I wish the evil meetings I go to have complimentary snacks.

“Ahhh…It’s been a long time since I have some good-quality crackers.” Professor Gobline sighed blissfully, scooping a handful for himself.

“You better save some for us, otherwise I’ll kick your fat ass!” Madelis warned the man, causing Fern to crack up laughing. Soon enough, the door on the other side opened, as three figures entered the room. The figure on the left was a tall, blonde woman wearing a physician’s outfit and had a box filled with booster shots. This was Alma, a researcher that injected herself with tiger DNA to transform into a human-tiger hybrid for additional strength. The woman on the left was also tall, but had short blonde hair. Her outfit consisted of a dark blue jumpsuit that showed a generous amount of cleavage. This was Amber, a mech-suit pilot that prefers fighting on her own.

The figure in the center was the strangest one of them all; she had the appearance of a pirate captain ghost with white hair and light blue skin and has her left arm split off into several octopus tentacles. Her outfit was like a pirate captain’s, only it was torn up in several places. This was Elysion, leader of the Waifu Army and the wielder of ancient pirate magic.

Yes, Metal Slug Attack does indeed have magical pirate ghosts and human-tiger hybrids. Even for a fairly zany series, that’s a bit out there.

“Ah, you decided to come. How wise of you.” Elysion commented, as she and her commanders took their seats. “I take it you’re here on Krishna’s behalf.”

“Correct. We heard you wanted to forge an alliance with the Divine Powers.” Jaern answered.

“The MS Waifu Army wishes to secure the support of the Divine Powers in destroying the MS Loyalist Army.” Alma replied. “The souls of our enemies should be suitable for Shesha’s consumption.”

“H-H-How do you know about Shesha?!” Jaern stammered.

“Oh that’s easy, we heard it from that Madame X lady a while ago.” Amber answered.

“Which is why we’re negotiating our alliance with you all, as opposed to her. It’s nonsensical and complicated, but when did the author care about such matters?”

“Now as for why we want the MS Loyalist Army defeated; we abhor those morons. Our goal is to inject more waifus into Metal Slug Attack for the sole purpose of bleeding nerds’ dry of their cash.

Wonder what the exchange rate for souls are, since these ladies are after fat stacks of Benjamin’s.

So we steal them from other franchises, edit them so they look different yet similar, and force them to wear revealing outfits. It’s an easy way to make money.” Elysion stated, a twisted grin on her face.

“I’m down with the plan. Nothing wrong with adding hot bitches in video games.” Texan grinned. “Got a list of members in your army?”

“Well excluding the three of us; there’s Aswang, Agalia, Julia, HMT, Arsinoe, Halle, Miharu, Izabella, Aisha, Chunyan, Esther, Aileen, Molly, Reika, Ichima and Mira.” Alma listed off. “And those are just our commanders. We’ve got thousands of obedient soldiers under our command.”

Translation: “These are the characters the author doesn’t like for the sole reason that they’re not from Pokémon Reborn.”

“Excellent, your army sounds like it’s in top shape.” Connor praised the trio. “Of course it wouldn’t take much effort to wipe out a bunch of disorganised scrubs.”

“Yeah these MS Loyalists sound like a bunch of losers if you ask me.” Fern snarked, crossing his arms.

“They are losers; always going on about their precious war machines. Fuck off! They only reason why they tolerate the Blaze Brigade bitches is because they brought their own war machines.” Amber ranted.

For those of you out of the loop, the Blaze Brigade is an established faction of the Rebel Army that deals primarily in machines that incinerate the enemy.

Oh and suck it up Amber; you’re just jealous you didn’t come up with the idea first.


“Well to be fair, wacky war machines were an important part of the franchise.” Madelis commented.

“True, but that was in the past, and these games need more representation.” Elysion retorted.

“I’m not 100% sure this is the representation they ask for, but it’s the best they’re gonna get for the moment.” Professor Gobline conceded to the MS Waifu Army leaders.

“Excellent…you finally realise the power that waifus can possess.” Alma grinned wickedly.

I have to agree with Tiger-Lady here; after all Fire Emblem Heroes makes mad bank off of it’s overpowered female chara—hey wait a minute. Why is it ok for Heroes to have powerful women, but not Metal Slug Attack?!

I guess it makes more sense in Heroes than in Metal Slug, but I digress.


“Soon those losers who cry about Metal Slug straying from its roots would kill themselves out of despair, and I’ll be laughing at their funerals!” Amber grinned wickedly as well.

“Uhhh…so I take it the alliance has been formed?” Jaern inquired.

“Hmmm? Oh yeah, we accept the terms of the alliance. Now scoot along, we’ve got some work to do.” Elysion informed them, as the traitors left the room to head back to the airport. They can rest easy now, since the Divine Powers has gained a powerful ally.

Powerful allies that would get trounced by some kids playing card games.

Shinjuku Shopping Mall: 1:30 pm

The sun shone brightly on this warm spring day; as the mall was packed with tourists and eager shoppers, creating a hectic yet upbeat atmosphere. Astolfo, Roland and Micaiah were busy walking around the place, with Sothe following behind the trio.

“I’m a bit surprised Chevvie didn’t come along with us.” Roland admitted. “He loves going shopping with us.”

“Yeah, but he promised to help out Blair regarding that Jack Frost fellow.” Micaiah replied. “Besides, we need someone to defend the fort while we’re out.”

“That’s Micaiah for you, coming up with the best strategies. Man, imagine if she teamed up with Ike, those fools in the Divine Powers wouldn’t know what hit them!” Sothe exclaimed, fanboying about the epic crossover.

I’m sure the author thinks his crossover fic is epic, but as we all know, that isn’t the case.

“I’ll pass on the offer, since I wouldn’t want to deprive you of some personal time with your idol.” Micaiah teased, causing Sothe to start blushing like crazy.

“I-I-I-It’s not like that!” Sothe cried out, causing the others to chuckle amongst themselves.

“That aside, we should take the opportunity to get in some extra training.” Astolfo suggested. “We gotta be in top shape if we are to win the war.”

“Agreed. We’ll all meet back at the fountain in a couple hours.” Micaiah informed the group, as they went their separate ways.

“Well I guess it’s time for me to find a duel. I hope it’s with a cute girl.” Roland grinned to himself, a faint blush appearing on his face.

Flirting with women, using card games! 95% of all men recommend it.

He proceeded to walk for a bit when he let out a faint gasp and hid behind a pot plant. Standing outside a bookstore were Titania, Amaria and Julia, casually browsing the available selection.

“Seems like they don’t stock the books I’m interested in.” Titania commented, a little disappointed.

“Don’t worry about it Tania, I’ve sure there’s another bookstore nearby. Perhaps it will have what you’re looking for.” Amaria replied.

“I’ll let you two go off on your own, I’ve got some boomies to buy!” Julia grinned in a childlike manner.

“Just don’t blow up the mall; I don’t want Ame chewing me out over it.” Titania told Julia sternly, as she and Amaria walked off to the north, leaving Julia confused but still cheerful. Roland was lucky he wasn’t spotted by the trio, which would’ve been awkward since he found the girls to be very attractive.

No shit, you’re the author’s chosen avatar. Of course you’d find his waifus attractive!

He witnessed Julia walking to the south as his attention was soon directed to a mysterious cloaked figure, eyeing up the peppy cheerleader. The cloaked figure began to follow Julia, with Roland in hot pursuit of the figure. Around five minutes later, Julia soon realised she was being followed and started to become concerned, diving straight into an alleyway with the cloaked figure catching up behind her.

“Ok, can you stop following me now, Mr. Creepy?” Julia requested, annoyed by the stranger.

Wha, you’ve never experienced hooded guys stalking you? Wait until you step into my shoes lady.

“Heheheh, you’re kinda cute you know that?” The figure commented in a nasally, nerdy tone of voice.

“Thank you I guess…?” Julia replied uneasily.

“Now why don’t we have a bit of fun here? I’ll know you’ll enjoy it.” The creepy man whispered to her, with the cheerleader becoming more and more nervous by the second.

“St-Stay back! My friend would break your neck if she were here right now.” Julia demanded, frightened out of her mind.

“Ha! But she isn’t here now, is she?” The figure crooned. “Now let me have my way with you!”

Oh boy, nothing like writing in some faceless rapist to make the author look good in front of his waifu.

“Not a chance in hell! I’ll make you go boom so quickly, your head will be blasted off into the stratosphere!” Julia snapped at the thug, a newfound spark of courage shining in her body. However the thug didn’t take the threat well.

“You fucking bitch! If you’re not gonna give me what I want, then I guess I’ll have to get it myself!” the thug growled, stepping towards her ominously. However he was soon clocked in the head by Roland, who rushed to Julia’s aid.

“Not on my watch you sick fuck!” Roland snapped, standing between him and Julia. “Why don’t you reveal yourself you coward?!”

“With pleasure…” the thug hissed, standing back up and yanked off his cloak, casting it aside. The thug was a scrawny teenage male with short red hair, green eyes and freckles on his face. He wore a blue jumper with a green long-sleeve shirt under it, a pair of brown trousers, and a pair of square-frame glasses over his face. “I am Harold, former contestant of the Total Drama T.V series, and agent of the Divine Powers.”

Seems like this guy’s a Total Drama character. That said, I have no idea who the hell this ass clown is.

“D-Divine Powers?” Julia inquired.

“They’re these bunch of deities who hate Pokémon fangames and want them to be destroyed.” Roland informed her.

“Oh, they must be the people who Titania talked about last night.” Julia deduced.

“Ha, you know nothing of our methods. The Divine Powers seek salvation for humanity, and will do anything to achieve it. If that means destroying a bunch of shitty fangames, then so be it.” Harold sneered.

“What do you have against the fangames anyway?” Roland inquired.

“That Reborn game makes nerds like me look bad, what with that Bennett character who attempted to rape Luna.” Harold growled.

Harold: “I hate Reborn because it makes nerds look like rapists.”

Also Harold: “I’m gonna go rape the first chick I see walking down the street.”

All joking aside, I know what scene he’s referencing. Bennett was ignoring Luna’s request to leave her alone yes, but he wasn’t planning on raping her.


“Um, the real Bennett is nowhere near as bad as the Bennett in the game. In fact he’s ok with the depiction simply because he knows it’s not real.” Julia replied.

“This isn’t about him, it’s about me! The bullying I got from the other contestants following their playthrough of the game mentally fucking scarred me. I joined the Divine Powers so I can get revenge on them, and claim what’s rightfully mine!” Harold ranted, bringing out his duel disk. “And if I have to kill some white knight to get some sweet pussy, then so be it.”

So these other contestants bullied you over something that didn’t even happen in the damn game. Yeah, you’ve got issues mate.

“If that’s how you wanna play...” Roland retorted, bringing out his own duel disk. “Then I’m down for a match!”

“Let’s duel!” They both declared while drawing their cards.

Roland: 4000

Harold: 4000


“I’ll get the first move!” Harold declared. “I play the field spell Jurassic World, and summon Jurrac Protops in Attack mode! And this baby gets a wicked power boost from my field spell.”

ATK (1700-2000)

DEF (1200-1500)


“I think I’ll end things off with a facedown card.” Harold sneered. “Your move chump.”

Oh boy, Jurracs. One of the most underwhelming decks that came out of the Duel Terminal series, which gained some additional firepower upon the release of Evols and their powerful XYZ monsters. How will the guy with one of the strongest archetypes in the game deal with such an intimidating foe?

“Gladly, I draw!” Roland cried out, as he began analysing his hand. Despite the deck being new to him, he already had a decent idea on how to make his plays. “I’ll activate Dark Contract with the Gate to add a D/D monster from my deck to my hand. Then I’ll send a D/D monster from my hand to my grave to special summon D/D Lamia in Defense Position!”

“Heheheh, my Protops has a special ability. It gains 100 ATK for every monster on my opponent’s field.” Harold chuckled.

ATK (2000-2100)

“But that won’t matter soon; now I’ll summon D/D Lilith in Attack Mode and forge a new circuit to connect myself to the truth!” Roland declared, as a circuit appeared and the two monsters merged with it, lighting up the three bottom arrows of the circuit.

“L-L-L-Link summon?!” Harold gasped.

“Tch, ruined the surprised.” Roland pouted, a smile on his face. “Now appear from the circuit, D/D/D Regal Chairman Napoleon!” He called out as a figure emerged from the circuit and landed on the field gracefully. The monster rode on a majestic white horse and wore a uniform similar to that of its name sake.

ATK: 2300

Attribute: Dark

Type: Fiend

Link-3

Arrows: Bottom left, Bottom, Bottom right


Foul! Twenty points from this authors house for improper summoning of a Link Monster. You’re supposed to tribute monsters equal to the Link Monster’s Link rating (Example, three monsters are required to summon a Link-3 monster). Luckily I came up with the perfect name to replace the previous counter.

Read the Rulebook, Dumbass: 3

I’m sure Dashguy would love the reference.


“W-What kind of monster is that?!” Harold demanded, sweat pouring down his face.

“I’ll let you find out for yourself.” Roland smirked. “Now I’ll activate D/D Necro Slime’s effect to banish D/D monsters from my graveyard to Fusion Summon D/D/D Flame King Genghis!”

“A-Ahhh!” Harold shivered in fear, as the powerful tyrant glared at the twisted nerd. However his Protops gained an additional power boost.

ATK (2100-2200)

“And here’s a little tip from me; all D/D and D/D/D monsters that are linked to Napoleon can’t be targeted by my opponent’s card effects.” Roland stated coolly. “Now Napoleon, turn that triceratops into a t-bone steak!”

The conqueror raised his sword in the air and charged at Protops, eviscerating the prehistoric critter.

“M-My Protops!” Harold complained.

Oh fuck off Harold! The damn deck has better dinos then that piece of shit.

Harold: 3900

“And now it’s time to go for the kill Genghis. Show him no mercy!” Roland added, with his powerful monster lunging towards Harold and slashed him.

“Fuuuuoooooohhhhhhhhhhahahahahahahahah!” Harold screamed in pain, before he started laughing as he activated his trap card.

Harold: 1900

“Wait, time out!” Roland called out as a Malus token was summoned to Harold’s field, with the latter recovering from the attack.

Harold: 3900

“Ha! I love the Golden Apple of Malus; the doc always told me that I need to eat more fruit and veg every day.” Harold crooned.

No wonder you got picked on if it took you this long to eat your veggies.

“Hmph, I set a card facedown and end my turn.” Roland replied. “Oh and one more thing; during my End Phase, Napoleon’s effect allows me to shuffle D/D, D/D/D or Dark Contract cards from either my graveyard, or my banished pile, equal to the amount of monsters linked to himself, into the deck.”

So not only does Napoleon protect your stuff, it enables you to shuffle vital resources back into the deck for further use. Wonder what other abilities it’s packing.

Julia was watching the duel in awe; powerful monsters duking it out against each other, with traps being thrown in the mix. Some explosions would make the game even better, but she was satisfied for now.

“Come on mister, you can beat Mr. Creepy over there!” Julia cheered for Roland, whipping out her pom-poms and performing a little routine for him.

Methinks the author wants his own personal cheerleader whenever he plays card games at his locals.

“Don’t worry miss, I’ll defeat this punk!” Roland pledged, with Harold growling in response.

“I’ll see you burn; my turn!” Harold seethed, drawing his card. “I’ll switch my Malus token to Defense Position. Then I’ll set a monster facedown and end my turn with a card facedown.”

“Heheheh, if I can’t beat him in sheer power, I’ll let his Contract cards drain the lifepoints out of him. And then I can claim my prize…” he thought to himself, a twisted smile on his face.

“Alright then, I draw.” Roland cried out.

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Now it’s time for you to pay your dues!” Harold yelled out.

You sound like the kind of guy who enjoys paying taxes.

“Don’t count on it bub. Napoleon’s final effect activates!” Roland retorted, surprising the nerd. “During my Standby Phase, I can shuffle face-up Dark Contract cards from my field to the deck, equal to the number of monsters linked to himself. Then I get to draw cards equal to the number of cards that were shuffled into the deck.”

Let me get this straight; not only does Napoleon enable you to summon multiple extra Deck monsters and grant them targeting immunity, not only does it enable you to recycle resources easily, but it shuffles Dark Contract cards at the beginning of your Standby Phase, enabling the player to avoid the Lifepoint cost while offering them extra draw power to boot.

Now you see why these made-up cards make a Yugioh fic much worse? They’re always overpowered pieces of shit that compensate for the authors lack of skill.


“This can’t be happening! You were supposed to pay for the contract!” Harold screeched.

“Did you really expect a D/D player to not have a way to circumvent the contract fees?” Roland teased, shuffling his card into the deck and drawing a new card. “And look at what I got, another Dark Contract of the Gate! I’m gonna play it like I did to the other one.”

“Wow-wee, talk about a slick move!” Julia called out. “Now make that meanie go boom!”

“With pleasure.” Roland replied, adding a D/D monster to his hand. “I’ll activate the effect of my D/D Swirl Slime to send D/D Vice Typhon and itself to the graveyard to Fusion Summon D/D/D Flame Emperor Executive Genghis in Attack Mode! But that’s not all; due to Flame King Genghis’ effect, I can special summon a D/D monster from my graveyard, and I’ll chose D/D Vice Typhon!”

“You mean you’re not finished yet?!” Harold exclaimed.

Don’t come crying to me Harold, I’ve still got just over half a chapter of this dreck to mock.

“Far from it! Now I’ll normal summon D/D Berfomet and activate its effect to change Vice Typhon’s level to level 4. Then I’ll proceed to from the Overlay Network, merging Vice Typhon and Berfomet to create D/D/D Wave King Caesar!” Roland called out, as another powerful tyrant appeared on his field. “Oh and Flame Emperor Executive Genghis’ effect activates, enabling me to summon a D/D monster from my graveyard, and I’ll chose Swirl Slime in Defense Position.”

“Give me an R, O, L, A, N, D! What does that spell, Roland!” Julia cheered, mimicking the letters while she danced.

“Time to end this! Napoleon, crush that Malus token!” Roland ordered, with the conqueror charging towards the token and slicing it into pieces. “Now Flame Emperor Executive Genghis, destroy his facedown monster!” The powerful warlord destroyed the monster with ease, only for Roland to be taken aback when he caught Harold smirking.

“Jurrac Ptera’s effect activates. The attacking monster gets returned to the hand after damage calculation.” The nerd sneered, as Emperor Executive Genghis was sent back to the Extra Deck. “Additionally, I activate Jurrac Herra’s effect to special summon it from my hand.”

*yawn* Can you two dumbasses hurry up already?! I haven’t got all day to watch you two play Rock-em, Sock-em Card Games.

The powerful dinosaur stomped all over the prehistoric landscape, and let out an almighty roar as it gained great power from the field.

ATK (2300-2600)

DEF (1500-1800)


Roland growled to himself; had he attacked with a different monster he could’ve won the game. However there was still those facedown cards Harold possessed; were they an insurance policy in case he attacked his Ptera with a different monster?

“I’ll end my turn.” Roland said.

“Heheheh, I draw!” Harold called out, and grinned evilly at the card he drew. He was thankful that he managed to survive the last turn, since he can now put his plan into motion. “I play the spell card, Painful Choice! Now I get to pick five cards from my deck and you have to pick one to add to my hand.”

“But that card’s on the Forbidden List!” Roland protested.

“In official tournaments yes, but this isn’t a tournament now, is it? Besides, the Divine Powers will do anything to achieve their goal.” Harold teased. “Now make your choice!”

*gasp* he’s playing a card on the Forbidden List, how frightening!

Roland was stuck in a tricky situation; all of Harold’s monsters appeared to be high-powered dinosaurs that could easily beat over his monsters. All of them that is, except for…

“I’ll pick the one in the middle.” Roland called out, with Harold adding the chosen card to his hand and discarding the rest of them.

“Now I’ll summon Jurrac Aeolo, the card you so generously chosen for me…” Harold smirked, summoning the puny-dinosaur onto the field.

ATK (200-500)

DEF (200-500)


Roland looked at the dinosaur and all his worries faded away into the wind, however it soon dawned on him just how foolish he was to have chosen that monster, having taken a closer look at it.

“You’re not the only one that can Special Summon monsters from the Extra Deck, and I’ll prove it to you by tributing Jurrac Aeolo and Jurrac Herra to Synchro Summon Jurrac Giganoto!” Harold declared, with the two monsters merging together to form a monster of tremendous power.

ATK (2100-2400)

DEF (1800-2100)


“Oh shit…” Roland squeaked nervously.

Congratulations Roland, you gave him an easy out to this situation when you could’ve clogged his hand with one of the higher levelled monsters he showed you. Oh and Giganoto is just a mediocre beatstick that only got used since Jurracs didn’t have many other options back then.

“And it gets even better.” Harold smirked triumphantly. “Giganoto gains 200 ATK for every Jurrac monster in the graveyard, and I count eight of them.”

ATK (2400-4000)

“But wait, there’s more! I activate my facedown card, Survival of the Fittest! Now Giganoto gains an extra 1000 ATK, making it surpass your monsters even further!”

ATK (4000-5000)

“Grrraaaaaahhhhh! Now Giganoto, crush that Regal Chairman Napoleon!” Harold roared, with his mighty beast effortlessly crushing the conqueror with its large feet.

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!” Roland cried out in pain, as he was flung backwards and crashed into the ground.

Roland: 1300

“Oh and one more thing; if a monster with Survival of the Fittest equipped to it destroys a monster by battle, it can declare a second attack.” Harold smirked.

Too bad Roland, you fucked up. Time to hand over your cheerleader—

“Oh no, Roland!” Julia called out to him, as he struggled to get up on his feet.

“Surrender your soul to Shesha, so that I may attain salvation!” Harold stated, with Giganoto getting ready for battle once more. “Now Giganoto, crush Wave King Caesar and end that miserable whelp once and for all!”

“N-Not so fast! I activate Call of the Earthbound, to direct your attack to Swirl Slime.” Roland retorted weakly, with Giganoto’s attack being directed to Swirl Slime, with the latter getting crushed into oblivion.

Or you could pull a Trap card that has nothing to do with D/D’s out of your ass to save you from your incompetence.

“Heh, you may have survived this round, but it’s a futile effort. Not a single card you have can surpass my Giganoto!” Harold bragged. “I end my turn.”

“I…draw…” Roland panted, drawing his next card and looking at it. Unfortunately it wouldn’t be able to get him out of the situation.

“Don’t forget your Contract fees.” Harold smirked.

“I know…” Roland hissed, as he took damage from his cards effect. “But now I can search for another D/D monster to add to my hand.”

Roland: 300

“Heheheh, why don’t you’ll admit defeat? You seem to be pretty capable; maybe I can convince Lord Krishna to spare you. I might even let you have some fun with the girl once I’m done with her.” Harold offered.

“I’d rather die than allow you to violate an innocent woman; in fact the card I added to my hand will be the one to dish out your punishment.” Roland smirked, his voice filled with a cool anger.

Oh shut the fuck up Roland! You can’t lecture Harold about his actions when the author plans on having you fuck multiple women, regardless of their relationship status/sexual preferences.

“What do you mean?!” Harold screeched.

“By tributing a D/D/D monster, I can special summon D/D/D Destiny King Zero Laplace!” Roland answered, as his Flame King Genghis disappeared and an entirely new monster appeared.

“BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Is that the best you got, a monster with 0 attack points?” Harold jeered.

And now we have the asshole who judge’s monsters based on Attack Points. You know, to complete the trifecta of clichés in shitty Yugioh duels.

“Oh you’ll be surprised at what it can do. Now Laplace, attack his Giganoto!” Roland declared, as the monster floated up into the air and began charging up a powerful beam of energy. “By the way, when Laplace battles with an opponent’s monster, it gains attack equal to double that of the monster it’s battling.”

ATK (?-10,000)

“B-But that means—“Harold began, before he clammed up and started shivering in fear.

“Yep, it’s game over for you!” Roland replied, as Laplace fired its energy at Giganoto, vaporising the dinosaur as it shrieked in pain.

"WHOOOOOAAAAA…. AAAAARRRGGGGHHH!” Harold howled in terror as he was flung into an alleyway wall.

Harold: 0

Winner: Roland


Thank fuck that's over.

This duel was wretched; not only did it show off the dream card the author desperately wants, but there were several misplays, most notable Roland’s boneheaded decision to pick Aeolo, enabling his opponent to Synchro Summon Giganoto. Speaking of which, where was all the Extra Deck summoning that made all of Declan’s duels in Arc-V fun as shit to watch?


“Looks like your ambitions went extinct!” Roland quipped, as Harold managed to get up off the floor.

“Why you—“ Harold began, before a look of pure terror overcame him, as his duel disk began glowing harshly. “No…NO! I didn’t mean to lose; please give me another chance!”

The blonde man was confused at Harold’s sudden change in mood, before he was startled upon seeing a holographic arm emerge from the disk and snatch Harold’s soul, causing the man to scream in pain before collapsing to the ground, his body disappearing into several small balls of light.

And so Harold got snaked. Farewell mate, you were nothing but another random villain in this trainwreck.

“Uh, that explosion was kinda disappointing.” Julia commented out of the blue, before clasping Roland’s hands tightly. “Thanks for saving my hide mister!”

“N-No problem my lady…” Roland stammered, a blush appearing on his face. “Anyway, where are your friends?”

“Oh Amy and Tania have gone off on their own for a while.” Julia replied. “That reminds me, you wanna go buy some boomies and make a big explosion with me?”

Because if there’s someone I have to entrust the explosives with, it’s the pyromaniac cheerleader with a coffee addiction.

“Sure. Though I’ve never bought firecrackers in my life before.” Roland admitted, as Julia wrapped her arm around the young man.

“Just follow my advice and you’ll score yourself the best firecrackers in this country!” the cheerleader pledged. “Now my Apprentice of Kabooms, let’s go on a magical mystery tour!”

“Now hold on a sec—“Roland began, before Julia gulped down a cup of coffee and sped off towards the firecracker store, causing the blonde man to scream in fear as he was flying through the air like a balloon. A few minutes later, the duo arrived there with Roland shivering to himself.

“Huh? Oh sorry about that.” Julia apologised, a goofy grin on her face.

“Its fine…just warn me the next time you do that.” Roland panted, brushing the dirt off his pants.

I wonder what bizzaro dimension this author lives in, where a person’s pants can get dirty after they’ve been dragged into the air like a balloon.

“Anyway, welcome to the best store in this region. Here you can buy all the boomies you could ever want and more!” Julia proudly proclaimed, with the duo boldly entering the store. The clerk looked up from the counter and immediately recognised the green-haired woman.

“Ah, Julia. How can I help you today?” the clerk smiled at her.

“Give me twenty of your biggest firecrackers!” Julia grinned, pulling a fat stack of cash out of her pocket and placing it on the counter.

Good to see that your spending money on fire crackers, young lady. What, were you hoping to blow up the hostile deities with them?

“Sure, just give me a few minutes and you’ll have your fireworks.” The clerk replied, heading towards the back storage and entering it.

“I figured you’d still be here.” A familiar voice called out, as the duo turned around and saw Titania and Amaria enter the store.

“Ooh, Tania! Amy! So good to see you here!” Julia cheered.

“So what did you—“Titania began, before she recognised Roland and locked eyes with him. “Well if it isn’t Hornio Ornio…”

…the fuck is a Hornio Ornio? Give me a minute.

*one minute later*

Turns out that Hornio Ornio is the main character from…a vintage porno parody of Super Mario Bros. I have no idea what to say about that.


“Uhh, his name’s Roland, Tania.” Julia replied. “But I think he should get a new name. How about Roly?”

“I can live with that.” Roland replied.

“So is this young man someone you met last night?” Amaria asked Titania.

“Yeah, he’s one of Astolfo’s friends.” She answered. “He can’t keep it in his pants whenever Melia’s around.”

Well to be fair, half the damn cast in Rejuvenation can’t keep it in their pants whenever Melia’s around.

“He’s not all bad, he did help fight off some thug who tried to attack me.” Julia vouched for the man.

“W-What happened Julia?!” Amaria asked, a concerned look appearing on her flawless face.

“Some creepy guy tried to have his way with me, but Roly trounced him in a duel and made him disappear!’ Julia recalled the event.

“The thug proclaimed that he was an agent of the Divine Powers, stating that I had to give my soul to Shesha. However when I defeated him, his soul was snatched by what looked like Shesha’s arm.” Roland added.

“Seriously?!” Titania exclaimed, with the duo nodding in response. “I guess they weren’t kidding around.”

No shit! Did you really expect them to do nothing but stand around and bitch about Pokémon Reborn on random forums?!

“Divine Powers?” Amaria inquired.

“You remember when I mentioned that the rally was interrupted by a bunch of assholes? That’s what they refer to themselves as.” Titania answered. “And Shesha is that giant snake demon that ate Hardy.”

“Oh my, they don’t sound like a pleasant bunch.” Amaria replied, shivering slighty. It was then that the clerk had returned from the back storage and placed a box of firecrackers on the counter.

“Here you go. Twenty of our best firecrackers.” The clerk smiled at Julia.

“They’re so amazing that there’s no words that could be used to describe them. Literally.”

“Yay! Thank you mister!” she cheered, handing the money to the clerk as she picked up the box. “Now be a good boy Roly and carry them for me.”

“A-Alright then…” Roland replied, not too thrilled about the idea. Julia dumped the box into his hands, with the young man taken aback by the weight of the box. The group of four then left the store and began making their way back to the Fangame Headquarters, however they happened to cross paths with Roland’s friends.

“Now that’s rather thoughtful of you to help carry their stuff Roland.” Micaiah praised the young man.

“Eh, I could’ve handled it myself, but it keeps his hands busy.” Titania replied.

Much like how the author keeps his hands busy as he searches for his fabled bikini pictures.

“Why is it that you can carry boxes, but you won’t carry me?” Astolfo pouted playfully.

“Uhhh…” Roland didn’t know how to answer that question.

“Oh, I can answer it!” Julia blurted. “It’s because he’s a good boy who saved me from some meanie who worked for those Divine Powers fellows.”

“The Divine Powers?!” Astolfo exclaimed. “What happened after the duel?!”

“My opponent got his soul snatched by Shesha; like what happened to that chick Blair duelled a couple days ago.” Roland answered.

And much like Missy, Harold spent the majority of the duel acting pathetically.

“Seems like Krishna’s really utilising Duel Monsters to suit his own agenda.” Sothe commented, clenching his fist tightly. “I won’t forgive him!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Enough chit-chat; I wanna see some explosions!” Julia cried out, snatching the box from Roland and taking a firecracker out of it. She planted it in the ground and lit the fuse, and began shivering with excitement as the fuse burnt out, before the projectile shot into the air and exploded, showering the sky with bright stars.

“Ka-boom!” Julia cheered as the firework exploded. “That was amazing; I wanna do it again!”

“Shouldn’t you—“ Titania began, as Julia light up another firework and watched it fly up into the air and explode. “—save them until later tonight…?”

“But that means I’d have to wait, and waiting is boring…” Julia playfully pouted, taking another firework from the box and lighting it up. She ended up repeating the process again and again until she ran out of fireworks.

Money well spent, Julia.

“Awwwwwww, it’s all over…” Julia sighed sadly. “And the store’s closed by now.”

“I wouldn’t get upset over it; besides you do know what tomorrow is?” Amaria commented, with the green-haired girl perking up upon hearing it.

“Oh yeah, I forgot it was Ame’s birthday tomorrow!” Julia replied.

“Hey, that’s pretty neat!” Astolfo replied. “Give my regards to her on her special day.”

“Neat isn’t the word I’d use, but whatever.” Titania commented, handing Astolfo and his friends some invites. “She wanted you lot to come along as well.”

Oh boy, a birthday party for a character the author likes. Wonder how much clit-licking he’ll throw in.

“Why thank you Titania.” Micaiah thanked the redhead.

“Hey don’t thank me; thank Ame when you see her tomorrow.” Titania brushed it off.

“Well I think we all had a pretty interesting day today. Why don’t we rest up for tomorrow?” Micaiah suggested.

“Hey, that’s a great idea. Which reminds me.” Julia began, before turning to face Roland. “Wanna stay over for the night Roly?”

“Uhhh, sure. Just as long as it’s alright with the others.” Roland replied.

“Eh, no complaints from me.” Sothe commented.

“Sure. Just as long as you clean up after him.” Titania commented as well.

You say that as if he’s a dog. Though to be honest he may as well be, with how he acts around you lot.

“Hooray! We’re gonna have so much fun tonight!” Julia cheered, as she yanked the young man’s arm and began dragging him back to the Fangame Headquarters, much to the latter’s chagrin.

“We should be heading back as well. See you tomorrow.” Amaria farewelled Astolfo and his friends, as she and Titania began walking in the same direction as Julia.

“Either Roland’s in for a world of pain, or he’s gonna get lucky.” Astolfo shrugged his shoulders. “He’s growing up so fast; I still remember when I trounced him in our first ever duel.”

Pokémon Fangame Headquarters: Reborn Wing

11:15pm


Julia and Roland spent the night talking with each other and playing a few games with the other people there. However it was getting pretty late, so the duo decided to turn in for the night and entered Julia’s bedroom. But the young lady had an interesting idea in her mind.

Aw shit…and so it begins.

“Hey Roly, wanna make some more ka-booms?” Julia inquired.

“More, ka-booms? You mean like fireworks?” Roland inquired, unsure of where she was going with this.

“No silly, a different kind of ka-boom. Specifically the one a couple makes at night.” Julia replied sweetly, a small smile on her face.

“Y-You mean you want to fuck me?!” Roland exclaimed, taken aback by what he just heard.

“Shhhh, not so loud!” Julia hushed him. “Didn’t your mother ever tell you to not use those words? Well Tania does but it’s best not to lecture her about it.”

You know they’re from a Pokémon game meant for older audiences, because they like to yell out curse words.

“Speaking of which, wouldn’t she break my neck if I made a move on you?” Roland inquired.

“Naaaahhhh, what she doesn’t know about can’t hurt her.” Julia brushed his concerns, as she began to slowly undress herself, with the bewildered young man unsure on what exactly to do. Eventually, Julia was left in nothing but her yellow lace bra, and matching yellow panties, a faint blush on her face as she smiled at Roland.

I can see her beauty from the elaborate description the author was kind enough to give us.

“Well if you really want to do this, then who am I to protest?” Roland conceded, the young man hastily undressing himself until he was in nothing but his boxers.

“Hooray! We get to make late-night boomies!” Julia cheered, leaping onto Roland which caused him to fall backwards onto her bed.

Lemon starts here. If you don’t like it, you can skip it.

The two of them began kissing each other passionately, hugging each other tightly. The slow, blissful kissing soon evolved into a full-scale French kiss with their tongues clashing against each other as if they were sword-fighting with each other.

That’s the wrong character mate, Titania’s the one who fights people with her sword, er Aegislash.

While they were kissing each other, they were running their hands over each other’s smooth curves, with Julia pinching Roland occasionally.

“H-hey, be gentle will you.” Roland giggled, with Julia giggling as well.

“But you seem to be enjoying it.” Julia replied.

“Oh yeah? Well then you’ll enjoy this!” Roland stated, removing her bra and exposing her small to average sized breasts to the cool air, before sensually cupping them.

“Starting up the preparations I see?” Julia commented, moaning lightly from the pleasurable sensation. Roland picked up on his sensual fondling, tweaking her soft but firm nipples occasionally, causing the green-haired lady to moan in bliss. Then in a move most daring, the blonde man began to gently lick Julia’s nipples, sending shivers down her spine.

Nipple-licking, how daring.

“Oh wow, this feels amazing!” Julia grinned. “A few fireworks would spice it up even more though.”

“True, but I’ve got something that’s even better than fireworks!” Roland replied, as he lowered Julia’s panties and proceeded to gently insert two fingers into her moist clam and began thrusting them in and out of her, causing Julia to sigh in bliss.

“Yay, now I’ll get to go kaboom, big time!” Julia cheered, as Roland continued his vigorous fingering. The young man then decided to spice things up by using his thumb to rub her aroused clitoris while his fingers were wedged in her delectable apple pie.

Pie? Is that what they call a vagina in your dimension author?

This caused Julia to sigh in relief as her sweet spot was being pleasured twice as hard as it was before. A minute later, Roland’s fingers brushed up against Julia’s G-spot causing her to gasp audibly as she coated his fingers in her creamy love.

“Now let’s see what kinda boomie you’re packing.” Julia began, lowering Roland’s boxers and eyeing up his member. Roland’s cock was as hard as a rock, yet as soft as jelly and was around nine inches long and one and a half inches thick, making him bigger down there than Batman.

I really want to know how a cock can be “as hard as a rock, yet as soft as jelly”. Also, are you really trying to make your self-insert better by saying his dick’s bigger than Batman’s?!

The peppy cheerleader proceeded to stroke the erect member, causing Roland to sigh in bliss.

“Wow, this is so much fun!” he cheered, enjoying the sensation of a slow, sensual handjob. Julia continued to stroke the penis, making sure to fondle Roland’s impressive ballsack as well as a bit of precum began to leak from Roland’s cockhead. This continued for a few minutes until Roland began moaning loudly as he began ejaculating, his sperm erupting from his penis like it was a geyser coating both participants in the sticky stuff.

A money shot that’s as arousing as a volcanic eruption.

“Now that was an impressive explosion.” Julia commented, as they began wiping the sperm off themselves, with Roland placing a condom over his meat. “I see you’re ready for the grand finale.”

“Yep. Let’s end this off with a bang!” Julia grinned, hopping on top of Roland and inserting his meat into her pie. Julia winced for a bit as she adjusted herself for a while, but eventually got used to it as she soon started to bounce up and down on Roland. It started out slow and gently, with Julia pressing her hands on Roland’s toned chest.

“W-Woah!” Roland gasped, his body shivering with pleasure. “This is amazing!”

“I figured you’d enjoy it.” Julia replied, a smile on her face. I began to thrust my sausage in and out of her jizz-bunker, timing it correctly so that the both of us got the maximum amount of pleasure from the experience. “Hey Roly, mind picking up the pace a bit? It is the grand finale after all.”

Oh for fucks sake! Not only are you throwing around more nonsensical slang, but you dipped into First-Person Perspective all of a sudden. Did we really need any more proof that this fic’s nothing more than your personal fantasy?

“Sure thing!” I replied, as I began to pick up speed and started thrusting into her quickly, causing Julia to yelp in surprise before she started moaning loudly in pleasure. Eventually, Julia felt a tingling sensation throughout her body, as she began to shiver like crazy.

“Here it comes; I’m gonna go…” Julia began, as her mind was clouded over with pleasure. “KAAAAAAAAAAAAABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM!” She cried out as she came hard all over my crotch, her juices splashing everywhere. The exhausted Julia hopped off of me and began stroking my member to help finish me off.

“I’m gonna go boom as well!” Roland gasped, as he soon ejaculated into his condom, as it began to balloon like crazy. Eventually it was at its limits and burst open, as Roland continued to blast his hot cock broth all over the place. After a few seconds, he’d finished ejaculating, and began panting for breath as Julia lied beside him. “That was amazing...did you enjoy it as well?”

Eh, the cock broth was cold. 0/10 for me.

“Yeah, that was quite a way to go out?” Julia replied, before rolling over to the side and tucking herself under the blankets. “Now it’s time for me to get some z’s. Night Roly!”

“Night Julia.” Roland replied, as the duo soon drifted off into the world of dreams.

Tsukiji Kongangi: Leader’s quarters

Oh thank goodness the author blew his load. Now we get to end this damn chapter with more commentary from the Divine Stooges.

Krishna was busy analysing a list of characters from all the Pokémon fangames out there. Crosses were over several faces on the list, indicating that they had been eliminated. Additionally there were circles over the faces of the traitors, indicating their allegiance to the Divine Powers. Soon enough, Odin and Maitreya teleported into the room to view the list was well.

“You’re back. Do you have some news for me?” Krishna inquired, keeping his focus on the monitor before him.

“So far we managed to convince Nintendo to order a Cease and Desist on Pokémon Prism, igniting outrage in the community. However they have yet to update us on the situation regarding Pokémon Uranium.” Odin reported.

How the hell did that go down anyway; did Odin storm into Nintendo’s Headquarters and demand they do something about those fangames?

“Additionally, our plan to utilise the Duel Monsters card game to harvest souls for Shesha is working out splendidly. Of course we did lose a few duelists, but their sacrifices will not be in vein.” Maitreya added.

“Excellent. It seems those fools were all bark and no bite.” Krishna replied happily. “Soon they shall realise that our goal is noble and just.”

“I’m surprised you lot are still waging war against these video games.” A familiar voice mocked them, as Dagda appeared in the room.

Don’t be Dagda, they’ve been reduced to nothing more than strawmen for the author to beat up.

“So your back. How did your analysis go?” Krishna inquired.

“As I expected, these games are a waste of time. Imagine what humanity could’ve achieved had they not wasted their time with these video games.” Dagda commented.

“Now you know why we must destroy them.” Odin replied. “So why not join us then? You can reclaim your former position once the Creator God has been dealt with.”

“While I want the Creator God disposed of as well, I’d rather die than work with the lot of you!” Dagda retorted. “Besides, I already have a plan set in motion; one that would surpass whatever you’re doing.”

Eh, I doubt you have to do much to form a better plan than “whining about video games.”

“Ha! You talk about this grand scheme of yours, yet you still don’t have a Godslayer.” Maitreya mocked back, causing Dagda to sigh to himself.

“I don’t have the time for this…” Dagda muttered, as he soon teleported out of the room.

“Now that the nuisance has left, how goes the search for our own Godslayer?” Maitreya inquired.

“I’ve been studying this list to find our Godslayer, but I haven’t had any luck so far.” Krishna replied, scrolling down the list before stumbling upon a familiar face. Krishna took a closer look and began smirking to himself. “Gentlemen, it seems we’ve found our Godslayer.”

Who could’ve attracted Krishna’s attention? Find out in the next chapter of Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Made up Cards:

D/D/D Regal Chairman Napoleon

ATK: 2300

Attribute: Dark

Type: Fiend

Link-3

Arrows: Bottom left, Bottom, Bottom right

Summoning condition: 2 D/D or 2 D/D/D monsters

Effect: D/D and D/D/D monsters linked to this card can’t be targeted by your opponent’s card effects. At the End Phase of your turn, you can shuffle cards from your Graveyard or your banished pile, equal to the amount of monsters linked to this card. During the Standby Phase (Quick Effect): You can shuffle face up Dark Contract cards on your side of the field, up to the amount of monsters linked to this card into the deck, then draw one card for each card shuffled into the deck by this effect.


And here we have the complete rundown on the made up card; as I said before, t’s overpowered garbage.

Damn, that chapter was something else. I’m kinda glad I had that longer than expected break because I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to survive all that shit I put up with. Hopefully I don’t encounter any more issues, so that I can provide more consistent updates for you all.


Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame
Cain
Aya
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania
Amaria
Julia
Melia
Valerie
Shiv
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Damien
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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GorillaGamer
Posts: 229
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Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sat Sep 22, 2018 12:28 am

Following the double torture that was a shitty duel, and an unarousing lemon, it’s time for us to get back to the plot as the author attempts to rip off Shin Megami some more.

Previously, Roland defeated Harold in a duel and successfully bonded with Julia. Meanwhile, Krishna had finally found the Godslayer he was looking for.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 6: Party Crashers

The next day:

The sun shone brightly in the sky, with the birds chirping in the sky. Roland was still sleeping peacefully, when he was woken up by someone yanking the curtains open. The young man, squinting his eyes in response to the sudden increase in brightness, noticed Julia in her cheerleader uniform, a cup of coffee resting in her hands.

“Gah…morning Julia. Is that for me?” Roland acquired.

“Nope. It’s all mine!” Julia retorted, slurping up the coffee with ease. “Morning Roly!”

To be fair, I wouldn’t want to drink anything made by the chick who gets off to explosions.

“So err…is there anything you wanted to talk about what we did last night?” Roland inquired, sitting up in bed.

“Nah, it was a fun night. I got to teach you how to make late-night boomies, and you gave me the best one I’ve had in a while.” Julia replied.

“Had in a while, you mean last night wasn’t your first time?” Roland asked.

“Well, it was the first time I did it with someone else. Usually I’d make boomies on my own.” Julia answered.

Eh, there’s plenty of guys out there who are into crazy ladies. You might get lucky one night.

“Besides, you might get asked to make late-night boomies with the others.”

“H-Huh?!” Roland exclaimed, surprised by what he just heard.

“Yeah, I had several of my friends tell me that they heard us last night. They’ve shown interest in hanging out with you.” Julia answered, wrapping her arm around Roland’s shoulder, a grin on her face. “Now my student, I grant you permission to teach the others how to make late-night boomies with you!”

Oh boy, and here comes the inevitable cavalcade of bimbos who the author wants to cuddle up with at night. My favorite.

“Y-yes master!” Roland blurted, with Julia moving her arm away from him and petted his head.

“That’s a good boy. Now let’s get some noms!” Julia grinned, as she yanked Roland and began dragging him to the cafeteria. When they got there, Julia kicked the doors opened, with everyone directing their attention to the duo.

“You ok there?” Titania answered, taking a sip of hot chocolate while wearing a red and grey bathrobe. Amaria was beside her, wearing a blue and sea-green bathrobe, while eating a bowl of cereal.

“Yep, and I brought the man of the hour with me. Give it up for Roly!” Julia cheered, presenting the young man to the other occupants.

He just fucked you last night; why present him as if he won a Nobel Prize? Do they hand those out for fucking people?

“That’s nice but couldn’t you have waited until he got dressed?” Amaria replied, pointing out that Roland was still in his boxers.

“Oh yeah…” Julia said, before snatching a nearby tablecloth and throwing it over Roland. “Is this a bit better?”

“It’ll do for now…” Titania muttered, as Roland and Julia took a seat.

“So is there anything in particular you need me to do?” Roland asked.

“Well we need someone to help shift the tables and chairs to the garden in the center of the facility, since that’s where the party’s being held.” Titania informed him. “Don’t slack off and the job will be over with quickly. Got it?”

“Yes ma’am.” Roland replied, scratching the back of his head.

“Don’t pull the flowery language card on me, it doesn’t work.” Titania commented.

Don’t you get it, Titania? The author wants his avatar to be as gentlemanly as possible, making it inevitable that you and Amaria fall for him.

“But it worked when I used it on you.” Amaria replied.

“Eh, you got me there.” Titania admitted, resting her hand on Amaria’s shoulder. “Anyway, once you’re done with the furniture, I’ll need you to set the tables up as well. Shouldn’t be that difficult for you.”

“I can do that for you; just give me some time and it’ll be done!” Roland promised.

“Alright then, you can start right now.” Amaria smiled, handing him a rather extensive list.

“R-Right now…?” Roland replied, taken aback by the size of the list.

“Yes, right now. What, you thought you could fuck me for free? Not in this life, chump.”

“You said you’ll get it done, so I’m giving you a list of things to do. Try not to wear yourself out too quickly.” Amaria answered, with the blonde man sighing to himself as he began making his way to Julia’s room so he can get dressed up for the day.

Several hours later

Pokémon Fangame Headquarters: Lobby room


Astolfo and his group had arrived at the designated time and were waiting patiently in the lobby. The pinkette was wearing a fancy rose-pink and white suit that had a silver rose lapel attached to the collar.

“Well here we are, I hope I look presentable enough.” Astolfo commented, adjusting his collar.

“You look fine Astolfo, there’s no need to worry about it.” Chevalier replied. He was dressed up in a light-blue and white suit that had coattails at the bottom of the jacket. His lapel was a white hibiscus lily pinned to the jacket.

“Besides, you hee-ave me to liven up the party, ho!” Jack Frost chimed in, sitting on Chevalier’s shoulders.

I forgot you were in this thing, Frosty boy. That’s how irrelevant to the overall plot you are.

“I’m sure they’ll warm up to you, Frosty.” Blair quipped back. She was wearing a red, short-sleeved dress and had a yellow jacket over it.

“H-Hey!” Jack Frost protested, causing the others to giggle politely.

“That aside, it’s nice to be able to attend a party. I haven’t been to one in a long time.” Micaiah admitted. She was wearing a stunningly beautiful purple ball gown, and had a small bag to keep her trusty tome safe just in case things go haywire.

“But I offered an invite to you, and you knocked it back.” Sothe protested. His outfit of choice was a rather dashing black suit.

“I was incredibly busy that day helping Pelleas with a few things. Besides, all the party would’ve been is you gushing about Ike for a few hours.” Micaiah retorted, crossing her arms while giving Sothe a smug smile.

“It was his birthday Micaiah! Of course I’d praise him; it’s his special day!” Sothe blurted, an embarrassed expression on his face.

So I take it your gift was a birthday blowjob?

The groups chatter was soon halted by the arrival of Julia and Roland, both of which are dressed up in their usual attire.

“Hey-hey-hey! How’s it going you guys?” Julia inquired.

“Uh, we’re fine Julia.” Astolfo replied.

“Cool! Hey, what’s with the fancy get up?” Julia asked. “It’s not like we’re having a fancy event or anything.”

“Oh…well at the very least we didn’t come in our pyjamas, as much as I wanted to.” Astolfo replied sheepishly.

“Your pyjamas consist of nothing more than a nightgown that barely covers your backside! No way are you going to a party dressed like that.” Blair argued.

I question why his pajamas are that revealing, but fan art commonly depicts Astolfo as some nymphomaniac, which is probably where the author got his inspiration from.

“Yeah, nobody wants to s-hee your backside, ho!” Jack Frost added, as Julia looked at him with a puzzled expression on her face.

“Who’s this little cutie?” she inquired.

“I’m Jack Frost, the most dashing snowman in this hee-misphere!” he proudly introduced himself.

“I can’t wait to show you to my friends!” Julia cheered, picking up Jack Frost and started running to the garden where the party was being held.

“S-should we follow them?” Roland inquired.

Well unless you want your snowboy getting captured in a Pokéball, then it’s best if you follow them.

“Hell yeah! I wanna get this party started!” Astolfo cheered, as the group of six made their way to the garden.

0000

The group had arrived at the garden and were taken aback by how lively it was. There were ribbons and streamers hanging from the buildings and window sills, while there were bunches of balloons placed in strategical areas to liven up the place. There were various programmers from the various games chatting amongst one another, with a certain green-haired cheerleader in the center of a decently sized group.

“You’ve got to see this little fellow Astolfo brought with him!” Julia exclaimed, showing off Jack Frost to the group as if he were a plush doll.

He may as well be, with how he’s been depicted so far.

“Hee-ho-ho?” Jack Frost inquired, as the group started fawning over him.

“Aw, he’s so cute!” Scarlett chimed, clasping her hands together. Scarlett was a very cute young lady, with short pink hair and pink eyes, both of them being a few shades darker than Rosetta’s. Her outfit consisted of a red long-sleeved jacket, a short white dress, and black stockings that were topped off with a pair of pink sneakers. Scarlett also had a headband in her hair that was decorated with a bright red bow. “I wish I could keep him.”

Scarlett! My waifu’s finally here! It’s just a shame that she’s only in this fic for the author get his rocks off.

“I don’t think he’d appreciate it that much.” Luna commented, as Jack Frost started to poke her cheek, causing the former to giggle softly. Luna was around the same age as Scarlett, and was also very pretty, with her average length blonde hair, green eyes and her smooth, supple skin. She wore a black and white maid dress, which had matching black and white striped stockings, and black shoes. On top of her head was a black headband with heart shaped patterns on it. Additionally, she wore a gold brooch that was pinned to her uniform and it had an emerald set in it.

Oh hey Luna, feeling relieved that you no longer have to play ‘Little Sister’ for that cockmongler Steven?

“H-hey, wait up!” Blair called out to Julia, running up to her with the rest of her group closely behind her. “Next time, wait for us to catch up.”

“Oops, sorry about that.” Julia replied, handing the demon back to her.

“Hey, I was hee-njoying the attention, ho!” Jack Frost complained.

Jack Frost loves the ladies, and the ladies love Jack Frost.

“Don’t worry, you’ll find a way to attract more attention.” Chevalier replied, as a young girl walked up to Blair to take a closer look at the small demon. The girl had shining pink eyes and long black hair that was done up into two pigtails. She wore a simple dark-purple dress that was topped off with knee-high socks and black sandshoes. She also had a gold pendant around her neck with an amethyst set in it, and was cuddling a Jirachi doll.

“I see several strings surrounding you Jack; interesting, given how quickly they formed.” The girl commented, eyeing up the snowman.

“Strings, you mean like a puppet?” Sothe inquired, which attracted the girl’s attention.

Well he technically is a puppet for the author to play with, but the same can be said for all of you.

“Oh where are my manners, my name’s Anna. It’s a pleasure to meet you all!” she smiled, introducing herself.

“Yeah, it’s nice to meet you as well.” Micaiah replied, as she and her friends introduced themselves. “Now what were you saying before about strings?”

“Basically each string represents a close friendship a person has with someone; I’m able to see these strings and other things invisible to the naked eye.” Anna explained,

Anna does have those powers in Reborn, but they still haven’t been fully explained yet, even with the final episode being made as we speak. I like to think that she can warp the plot to suit the player.

as Julia began to eagerly drag a young to middle-age woman and a boy who they assumed was her son.

The woman was breathtakingly beautiful on an entirely different scale altogether; with her sparkling blue eyes, her medium length hair that was baby blue on the left side, and baby pink on the right side, and her tall slender frame that was topped off with tall, luscious legs, she was a marvel to behold. Her outfit consisted of a hot-pink string-top shirt that was covered by a blue sleeveless vest, a pair of skinny jeans that helped show off her amazing legs, and a pair of ice-blue high-heels. Astolfo and Sothe were unable to keep her eye off her, while Roland was shaking violently while drooling like a pervert. Even Chevalier, Blair and Micaiah were fascinated by her beauty.

Ah yes, Serra. Another yummylicious character from Reborn, who seems to be an author favorite based on that lavish description she got.

Her son was fairly average, if a bit shy. He was around the same age and height as Luna and had blue eyes like his mother and spiky black hair with red tips. His outfit consisted of a yellow t-shirt, with corduroy shorts and matching color sandshoes. He also wore a pair of reading glasses over his eyes, and was carrying an encyclopaedia dedicated to insects.

“So this is what you wanted to show me, Julia?” the woman inquired, her voice as soothing as a cool breeze.

Evidently, breath mints sell like hot cakes over in Reborn.

“Yep, I figured you’d be interested in him since you’re Reborn’s Ice-type Gym Leader, Serra.” Julia replied, as Serra’s son took a closer look at Jack Frost.

“Fascinating. This reminds me of how certain species of butterfly have adapted to living in cold conditions. However for the most part, butterflies manage to live through winter by hibernating inside their chrysalis, in a process known as overwinter. Specific species that go through this process include—“ he started rambled, before Serra gently rested her hand on his shoulder.

“I’m sure that he’s interested in what you’ve learnt about butterflies, Bennett, but we can’t take up all his time.” Serra pointed out.

Even she realizes that no one gives a shit about butterflies.

“Fair point mother, but what do you want to do about his owners?” Bennett inquired, pointing at the group.

“Oh my, they seem enamoured with me.” Serra muttered, as she cleared her throat to snap them out of their stupor. “Good morning, how can I help you?”

“Ah, ah, sorry about staring at you miss! It’s just that you’re beautiful!” Roland blurted, his face red with embarrassment.

“Me, beautiful?” Serra inquired, before sighing sadly. “Surely you jest, after all I am but a broken mirror, withering away as time goes on.”

You can’t say that when you’re one of the hottest characters in the game, despite being the Ice Type Gym Leader!

“Don’t say that about yourself, you’re amazing! And if anyone says otherwise, they must be utter fools.” Roland continued, proudly puffing his chest out.

“Thanks. At the very least you’re a better man than the last guy I dated.” Serra replied, her frown turning into a small smile. “Anyway, I have to get a couple more things ready. Perhaps we should talk a bit more later.” She flashing him a wink before heading off in the opposite direction, with Bennett following closely behind her. A few minutes later, the group heard the chattering of a pair of young girls, as they soon ran up to Anna, with the latter turning to great them eagerly.

“Heather, Shelly! So good to meet you two!” Anna smiled.

Yay, Shelly’s here. She was one of my faves in Reborn. I hope to hell and back that the author doesn’t blow his load in her, though I don’t exactly have high hopes for here escaping this thing unscathed.

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world! Even my dad’s coming and you know what he’s like.” Heather commented. Heather was around Anna’s age and height and had short magenta hair, and matching color eyes. Her outfit consisted of a white button up shirt that was a couple sizes too big for her, and a pair of blue shorts. Additionally she had a gold ring on her finger that had a ruby set in it.

“Y-yeah, t-this is gonna be f-fun.” Shelly replied somewhat nervously. Like Heather, she was around the same age and height as Anna and had long purple hair that was done up in a single plait and blue eyes. Her outfit was a simple light-green dress that had short puffy sleeves, lilac socks and matching shoes.

“Aw come on Shelly, be a bit more excited about it. After all it is Ame’s 25th birthday.” Heather reminded her friend.

“Y-yeah, I did remember her gift. I hope she likes it.” Shelly hoped.

“I’m sure she will. Besides, she’s never been a big present fan.” Heather commented.

“Ah good, I was worried for a moment.” Astolfo interjected, attracting the girls’ attention.

I expected you to forget the present, you cheapskate.

“Oh, you must be that pink-haired fellow Ame mentioned a while ago. I’m Heather; I’m sure we’d get along ok so long as you don’t tell me what to do.” She introduced herself.

“I-I’m Shelly, the Bug-type Gym leader of Reborn and Heather’s f-friend.” She replied shyly, covering her mouth with her hand.

“It’s nice to meet you two!” Astolfo replied quickly, startling Shelly. “Ah, sorry about that…”

“It’s fine.” She spoke softly, before being interrupted by the sound of someone tapping a spoon against a wine glass.

“May I have your attention? It is time for us to present to you, the woman of the hour!” Shiv proudly declared, as Ame entered the garden through the door to the Reborn Wing. She was wearing an elegant purple dress that has a modest side-slit on the right. Behind here were two teenage girls around the same age.

Just how many characters are getting introduced in this chapter?!

The first girl was very beautiful. She had smooth, creamy white skin which perfectly suited her silky, shoulder length, blonde hair. She also had bright blue eyes that seemed full of life and energy. As for her outfit, she wore a black jacket with a matching coloured shirt underneath as well as a black skirt that showed off her lovely legs. She also wore black, thigh high leggings and white sneakers. This was Alice, Ame’s daughter and the champion of the Reborn region.

Ah, it’s you. I was so used to seeing you clinging to Seehan that it was surprising to see you stand up on your own two feet. By the way, whatever happened to the guy? I kinda miss our rivalry.

The girl beside her was also quite pretty, with her hot-pink hair done up into two pigtails on either side of her head, as well as bright red eyes. Her outfit consisted of a scarlet jacket and skirt, with a black long-sleeved undershirt and black pants, topped off by a pair of scarlet boots. Additionally, she had a gold earring that dangled from her left ear and had a diamond set in it. This was Charlotte, the Fire-type Gym leader of Reborn and Alice’s girlfriend. The birthday girl got up on stage and took the microphone, with everyone turning to face her.

“May I have your attention please?” She requested, before clearing her throat. “I would like to thank you all for taking the time out of your day to attend my birthday party; however that is not the only reason I’m hosting this gala. As you know, the Divine Powers have declared war against us and everything we stand for, even going so far as to recruit those who we once considered friends. Krishna and his lackeys have been brainwashing the masses with his speeches about salvation and how our games are preventing them from attaining it, but his words are lies that he planted in order to lead the populace astray. Which is why we will counter them by informing everyone why our games aren’t as dangerous as he makes them out to be, and how they actually help the community.” She spoke boldly, with everyone present giving her a round of applause. “Now that I’ve said my piece, we can continue the festivities!”

My god, when will all these speeches end?! I came here to see card games on deities, not lame-ass speeches on the legality of Pokémon fangames!

Upon hearing that, everyone got back to what they were doing before the speech started. Alice and Charlotte decided to greet Astolfo and his friends, with Sothe going around and collecting autographs from the partygoers.

“Greetings, my mother told me about you. I’m Alice and this awesome lady beside me is Charlotte!” She introduced themselves.

“Fitting, considering how awesome runs in the family.” Charlotte added proudly. “Between my status as the Fire type Gym leader, Laura’s status as an Elite 4 member, and Saphira’s status as the Dragon type Gym leader, we’ll be able to show those fools just who they’re messing with!”

“I take it that they’re your older siblings?” Astolfo inquired.

“Uh-huh. Laura’s the middle child, but she doesn’t care about it that much. And Saphira’s the eldest in the family.” Charlotte answered. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t kick ass.”

“Yes, even when mother asked you to change your team following numerous requests from league challengers.” Alice added.

Like that Energy Ball Typhlosion you had for several episodes? Don’t think for a second that I forgot about that bullshit, Charlotte!

“Hmmm? I thought that gym leaders could use whatever Pokémon they liked, so long as it has the typing the leader represents.” Micaiah commented.

“The Reborn league works differently from the other leagues; for one thing the leaders get field effects that suits their team well, but can back fire on them if their opponent finds a way to deal with it. Additionally, every leader has six Pokémon on their team, even the first few leaders.” Alice explained.

“How interesting. Perhaps I should visit one day, not to battle, but to study the culture there.” Micaiah said, an intrigued expression on her face.

Ah yes, I can’t wait to ready your thesis about Pokémon fangames with edgy stories.

“You really should.” Ame called out, walking towards the group. “Following the incident a decade ago, we’ve taken strides to restore the once great nation. It wouldn’t have been possible had it not been for the hard work Adrienne put in.”

“Adrienn?” Chevalier inquired.

“The Fairy type Gym leader of Reborn. Xyr’s got a real knack for organising big projects like this. In fact xe was the one who organised this party.” Ame informed him. “Roland got to know xym earlier today; the two of them hit it off pretty well. I see that the two of them are chatting to each other.” She continued, with the group turning to the side and spotted Roland talking to another person, whom they suspected to be Adrienn.

Adrienn was a rather cute person, who had light blue eyes and silver hair that was done up in a long ponytail. Xyr’s outfit of choice was a short-sleeve baby blue crop top that showed off xyr’s slender torso, with a white long-sleeved jacket over it, and a pair of navy jeans that was held up by a black belt with a silver buckle.

And then there’s Adrienn, the non-binary character who unexpectedly became the mascot for Reborn. Fitting when you consider the ties the developers have with the Tumblr crowd.

“I gotta say, this was a rather impressive party you set up!” Roland complimented Adrienn, impressed by the presentation.

“Well I couldn’t have done it without the labor everyone pitched in to ensure that the plan went smoothly.” Adrienn replied, brushing a bit of dirt off of xyr’s outfit. “Quick question; what are your thoughts on this Divine Powers I’ve heard about?”

“As someone who had a personal experience with one of their goons, they’re nothing but bad news.” Roland answered, as Serra noticed the duo and walked up to them, with Roland starting to clam up for some reason.

I’m sure that pathetic thug you duelled was a most terrifying experience. Oh and Ice Babe’s here so I guess that’s a chance for the author to show off his manliness.

“My sincerest compliments to you for helping set up this party.” Serra praised Adrienn, who scratched the back of xyr’s head in embarrassment.

“It was nothing, just figured that I’d go all out for Ame given all that she has done.” Xe replied.

“Oh hey Serra, how are you enjoying today?” Roland inquired.

“Ah, Roland. It’s nice to see you again. I’m having a great time thank you very much.” Serra replied, a smile on her flawless face. “Bennett’s hanging out with the other minors in case you’re wondering.”

“I see…” Roland mused. “Anyway, what are your thoughts on the Divine Powers?”

“Honestly, they come across as the type of people who would write page long essays complaining about how giving Mario brown hair ruined the franchise.” Serra answered.

Oh boy, can’t wait for the inevitable Mario crossover where Krishna teaches Bowser how to play card games.

“Then again, Ame mentioned something about a giant snake they had.”

“Speaking of which, you said earlier that you had an experience with one of their supporters. Care to elaborate on it?” Adrienn requested.

“Certainly.” Roland replied. “I was wandering around town with a couple of my friends when I noticed this hooded figure stalking Julia. I followed them to ensure nothing went horribly wrong, only to see the figure attack Julia. I intervened and duelled the figure, who had revealed themselves to be an agent of the Divine Powers, and trounced him.”

“Ah yes, I remember Julia mentioning what happened yesterday to me. Apparently he got upset at how my son was depicted in the game and while I dislike his depiction myself, I wouldn’t go so far as to attack someone over it.” Serra recalled.

If you hated your son’s depiction in the game that much, why didn’t you change it? You’re part of the development team according to this story!

“She also said something about the two of you making late night boomies, as she aptly put it.”

“Uhh…” Roland was at a loss as to what to say next.

“No need to worry. It’s a safe bet that both parties consented to it, given the fact that Titania hasn’t flayed you alive. Boy can she get scary when she’s mad.” Adrienn commented, shivering slightly in fear at the thought.

“That aside, I’m interesting in getting to know you a bit more.” Serra admitted to Roland. “Perhaps later this week, we could go out for the night.”

“S-S-Sure.” Roland stammered, a blush appearing on his face. “It would be an honor.”

And Roland won a date with Ice Babe, simply because he’s the author avatar, and he beat up some Total Drama character with card games.

0000

The party went on for a few more hours, with the guests enjoying their time until Ame got up on stage once again to close off the festivities.

“I’d like to thank you all once again for being here today. I know some of your friends weren’t able to come, but I’m sure they had their reasons. Anyway, let us—“ she began.

“Forgive us for dawdling, but we’ve got a few words to say as well.” An alluring, yet familiar voice spoke out, causing the crowd to murmur in confusion.

“W-who said that?!” Ame demanded, as the clouds grew darker and blanketed the sky all of a sudden. Ame looked up at the sky and saw a bolt of lightning heading towards the stage, as she managed to jump off to the side in time before it struck the stage, startling the partygoers and creating a blanket of smoke. Once the smoke died down, three familiar figures had appeared on the stage, with a sizable horde of demons behind them.

“Y-You!” Ame snapped at them.

“Sorry for cutting you off, but I’ve got a few things to say.” Krishna replied, before turning to the crowd. “Attention enemies of the Divine Powers, I am Krishna; leader of the Divine Powers. Your glorification of these fangames is an insult to us, and the rest of humanity.”

Oh for fuck sake! Can this asshole do something other than imitate the Spanish Inquisition?!

“Why you!” Astolfo growled, drawing his sword and charged at the deity. However the pinkette was blown back by another demon, with the young man landing face first on the ground.

“Don’t stress yourself, I wouldn’t want such a magnificent body to get damaged beyond repair.” The demon hissed. The demon had the head and torso of a woman, and the tail of a serpent, and was fairly tall. The most notable feature was that her hair was made up entirely of vicious snakes.

“Thank you for dealing with the troublemaker, Medusa.” Odin thanked the demon. “Now then, our demands are simple; recall all copies of your game and burn them in a pile. Such filth has no right to exist.”

Why don’t you sicc your contacts in Nintendo onto them? It worked for Prism.

“Who the hell gives you the right to demand such a ludicrous demand?! We just want everyone to have a fun time, is that such a bad thing?” Melia snapped, locking eyes with the three deities.

“Your idea of fun, is to continue the worship of the Creator God; the same one who trapped you in your prisons of flesh. These games are nothing more than glorified propaganda.” Maitreya replied, which really riled Astolfo up.

“Can it you losers! You go on and on about how these games are opposing your salvation. But I know the real reason why you hate these games; neither of you can stand the fact that these games have several strong female leads, so you spin some story about salvation in order to fool the masses, when in reality you despise the idea of playing as a woman!” Astolfo ranted, with everyone present staring at him as if he grew a second head.

I would too if I just heard that; when did Krishna complain about female characters? Or is this another attempt at demonizing his side by accusing him of sexism?

“Does anyone here know what he’s talking about?” Krishna asked his compatriots.

“I believe he’s trying to imply that we have outdated views on women; views that these games supposedly challenge, which somehow frightens and angers us.” Maitreya answered. “Though that line of thinking couldn’t be farther from the truth.”

Well at least I know why Tumblr eats those games up like chocolate.

“Hmph, maybe I struck him too hard.” Medusa pondered, crossing her arms.

“If you want us to elaborate on why we oppose these games, then perhaps this is worth taking a look at.” Odin stated, as a few demons brought in a flat-screen TV and turned it on. The TV showed footage of a brutal civil war, with several shots of the dead and wounded, as well as refugees attempting to escape the violence. The partygoers were horrified at what they are witnessing.

“O-Oh my…” was all Blair could say, as Chevalier clung to her arm, frightened out of his mind.

“What’s hee-appening?” Jack Frost inquired.

“This is footage of a civil war breaking out, between those who prefer the fangames to the official Pokémon games, and those who prefer the latter.” Krishna informed the audience, before glaring at the crowd. “The blood of all those innocent souls is on your hands!”

Oh fuck you author! You’re using the Syrian Civil War/Refugee Crisis to make your strawmen villain act like total buffoons. Regardless of your stance on the issue, using the dead to push your agenda is one of the shittiest things a person could do.

“Our hands?! How dare you accuse us of being murderers, especially after what you did with Hardy!” Ame growled, her fists shaking with anger. Odin retaliated by firing a bolt of lightning from Gungnir at her, causing her to cry out in pain as she was sent flying back a few feet. The partygoers were frightened at what they saw, Alice most of all.

“Mother!” Alice cried out, running to her side and checking up on her.

“I’m fine…just a little shock.” Ame replied weakly, holding her daughter’s hand and gently squeezed it to reassure her.

“She’s a tough one…” Odin commented, with a few background demons chuckling in response.

Why would you say that—oh, oh no. now I get it. This author’s ripping off the scene from SMT: Apocalypse where the Divine Powers assault Flynn and kidnap him. This is going downhill faster than I anticipated.

“You cowards! It’s bad enough that you brainwashed out friends to betray us, but you attacked Ame for no reason at all!” Shiv snapped at the hostiles.

“The people who betrayed you weren’t brainwashed, rather they finally found enlightenment after being enslaved by that witch.” Maitreya reminded the black-haired man, whom snorted in response. “And they’re not the only ones who joined us.”

“W-What do you mean?” Ame inquired, as the door to the Insurgence wing opened, and she saw Zhong Kui walking out of the building, with Damien in tow. “W-Why Damien…?” she inquired.

“You lied to me; every last one of you!” Damien snapped, showing a stack of folders to the crowd.

Called it; I fucking knew he was gonna join them from the moment Krishna eyed him up in Chapter 2!

“What do you mean, we lied to you?!” Nora exclaimed, surprised by his betrayal.

“You said that my mother was in jail for her crimes against Torren, but the Divine Powers showed me the truth, you murdered her in cold blood!” Damien replied, slamming the folders onto the ground, with a few people picking them up.

“Date of execution: November 11th 2017.” Micaiah read aloud, studying the documents. It explained in detail about the crimes committed by a middle-aged woman known as Audrey, and how her prison sentence was changed to an execution.

“Damien, I can explain—“Ame began.

“Zip it! You lied to me before, why should I trust you now?!” Damien retorted, as he started to break down. “Now I’ll never get to see her again…” he sniffled, before sobbing into Zhong Kui’s shoulders.

While this could be a potential reason for betrayal, it doesn’t help that Audrey doesn’t even die in Insurgence. Par for the course with the author and his incompetence.

“There, there…” Zhong Kui comforted the sobbing teenager. “You’ll have a special place in the Divine Powers.”

“Hold up. What do you mean he has a special place?” Astolfo inquired, as Zhong Kui and Damien joined up with the enemy crowd.

“He is to be my Godslayer. My Kalki.” Krishna answered. “He is the one who shall destroy the fangames and put an end to the machinations of the Creator God.”

And now the author’s branding Damian as Krishna’s pet Godslayer, despite the fact that it wouldn’t work in this situation.

See, the main reason why Krishna wanted Flynn as his Godslayer was that he was the only human at that point who could take on Lucifer and Merkabah and live. Damian is an ordinary trainer with no special powers to speak of, so having him become a Godslayer is laughable asinine. Hold on, if Krishna really wanted a trainer with special powers, then why didn’t he choose Melia as his Godslayer?!


“Damien, is this truly what you want…?” Nora asked.

“I was unsure at first, but then I heard about what the Creator God has done. He must be disposed of.” He replied, wiping his tears away.

“I see…” Was all Nora could say, until she turned away, saddened by what she just heard. Damien felt a twang of guilt in his heart, but he decided to stand up tall and support the Divine Powers.

At the very least, his betrayal made more sense than the previous one, despite the circumstances being rather flimsy.

“If I may say something; what about those relics the one called Lin told us about?” Maitreya pondered, with Krishna recalling the conversation the two had earlier.

“I completely forgot about it, but I suppose now’s a good time to rectify that.” Krishna replied, before turning to the crowd. “May the ones whose name I call out make their way to the front? I seek the audience of Amaria, Anna, Aya, Charlotte, Heather and Luna.” The six girls looked at each other uneasily, before making their way through the crowd and stood before the Divine Powers.

“Yeah what do you want?” Heather asked bluntly.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. Seems your parents didn’t teach you any manners.” Krishna snarked, annoying the young girl. “It has come to my attention that the six of you each possess a rare and valuable piece of jewellery. I ask that you hand them over now.”

Ok, I mentioned that I’ll elaborate on this whole deal with the jewellery earlier in the mock. Now it’s time for me to fulfil my end of the bargain.

The main plot point of Pokémon Reborn is that Team Meteor, the villainous faction of the game, wishes to destroy the city so that the land can return to its original state. To do this, they need the power of Arceus, who is sealed inside a meteorite that is under the city, and locked behind a door that requires four keys; those keys being the Ruby Ring, Amethyst Pendant, Emerald Brooch, and Sapphire Bracelet, all under the respective ownership of Heather, Anna, Luna, and Amaria, despite Charlotte being the Bracelet’s original owner.

Now why did I say four keys and not six? Because the Pearl Hairpin and Diamond Earring are not in the game at all. The author gave Charlotte the Earring because he had to give her something as a cheap replacement for the Bracelet. And as for Aya and her Hairpin, I assume the author wanted to make her feel special since he jerks off to her.

And now it’s time for the million dollar question; why the fuck does Krishna want these keys? Is it part of his deal with the traitors? Does he want to destroy Reborn City since it exists in the same world as the game featuring it? Are they glorified trophies of his anti-fangame conquest? What’s the fucking deal with this shit author?!


“Or else what?” Amaria asked, fed up with the Divine Powers.

“Allow me to demonstrate to you the error of your ways.” Odin warned, aiming Gungnir at Alice and Ame and firing a bolt of lightning at them, causing the duo to cry out in pain once more.

“Alice!” Charlotte cried out, too terrified to move. “Please don’t do this to them!” she begged to the powerful deity. However Odin couldn’t care any less as he fired another bolt of lightning at the duo, before repeating the process again and again. The two girls let out agonizing screams of pain as the lightning coursed through their body, before they slumped onto the ground, greatly weakened from the attacks.

It made sense for Flynn to survive all those attacks, given how powerful he is. But Ame and Alice are regular human beings; they should’ve been rendered toast after the first strike!

Damien turned away from the scene, while Zhong Kui was a little horrified at what he saw, but kept it inside. Medusa however, was enjoying every last second of it.

“HAHAHAHAHAHA! This is quite the lightshow. Try not to damage them beyond repair Odin, they’ll make nice additions to my collection.” She hissed, with Krishna facing the Relic Keepers of Reborn, a twisted smirk on his face.

“My, my. It seems like they can’t handle it anymore. One more strike would kill the both of them; that is if you don’t hand over the jewellery.” Krishna sneered. “Now what will it be?”

This is the most pointlessly elaborate robbery I’ve ever seen.

Charlotte’s hands began shaking, as she took out her diamond earring and gazed at it, tears running down her cheeks. The once proud gym leader has been reduced to tears, knowing the life of her lover is on the line.

“Charlotte…” Luna said sadly, before she unclipped her emerald brooch and handed it to her. “You know what to do.”

“Alice helped me out when I was depressed, I feel that it’s my turn to repay the favour.” Aya commented, handing her pearl hairpin to Charlotte.

“She helped me and Tania fix our relationship before it was ruined beyond belief. I don’t want to see your relationship get broken here.” Amaria added, handing her sapphire bracelet as well.

“Alice has so many strings attached to her; seeing them disappear would bring heartache to many, which is why I won’t let it happen!” Anna declared, handing over her amethyst pendant.

“She’s kinda cool, and I don’t want her blood on my hands. So I’ll pitch in as well.” Heather added, handing over her ruby ring.

Did you mention that she gives really good head?

“Thank you all, so very much…” Charlotte sniffled, before walking up to Krishna and presenting them to him. “Here you go. Please don’t hurt them any more…”

“It seems that you managed to retain some common sense.” Krishna replied, taking the jewellery and placing them inside a small pouch and handing it to Maitreya. Almost immediately, several medics rushed over to Alice and Ame and placed them on some stretchers before rushing over to the medical facility in the headquarters

“I’ll let them go; after all, I am a merciful god.” Krishna stated.

“Merciful my ass! What kind of demon would order his crony to attack innocent civilians after spewing bullshit about them causing a civil war?!” Titania snapped, having reached her breaking point.

Took you this long, huh? My breaking point was reached during that shitty lemon from before.

“I’d watch your mouth if I were you; I still haven’t forgotten your rudeness the last time we met.” Maitreya reminded her.

“I don’t give a damn if I hurt your feelings, I’m going to end this right now!” Titania declared, bringing out her Aegislash and using it as a sword and shield. “Fight me, Krishna!”

“Very well, I accept your challenge. But let me make thing interesting; if I win then you’ll allow us to go free, but if you win, I’ll disband the Divine Powers, hand over your relics and cease the war against your fangames.” Krishna accepted the challenge, with the partygoers surprised by the bet he made.

“Well now, this is gonna be interesting.” Odin mused.

“Fine by me.” Titania accepted the bet. “Now what weapon will you be using?”

“Why this of course!” Krishna showed his ornate flute to her, the same one he carries everywhere. “It’s all I’ll need to deal with you.”

Given how much of a pain in the ass his boss battle was, I’ll hold him up on that threat.

“Alright then, but don’t start crying when I trounce you.” Titania replied, with everyone else present making room for the two combatants to duke it out. The already tense atmosphere grew even more so as the combatants started each other down. Several of Titania’s comrades were confident that she’d triumph over Krishna, while a few demons were making bets with each other over how long Titania would last. It was the chirping of a bird that was passing by that motivated Titania to initiate the first attack, running towards Krishna whom smiled innocuously at her, barely moving a muscle. But just as she was about to deliver a lethal slash upon the deity, he simple vanished in a beam of light.

“What the?!” Titania called out, as Krishna rematerialized several feet behind her.

“It seems your aim is a bit off. I’ll let you have another chance.” He mocked her, infuriating the redhead. She threw her shield at Krishna at breakneck speeds, striking the deity in the stomach as he grunted in pain. Taking the chance laid before her, Titania charged at him once more in an attempt to impale him, however he managed to teleport in the nick of time.

Such enthralling action…

“This is starting to get old now.” Titania commented, as her Aegislash picked up its shield off the soft, grassy floor.

“I agree, which is why I’ll end this now.” Krishna replied, reappearing before his followers as he started to played a few notes on his flute. The melody that started to fill the air was a strange mixture of soothing, yet menacing. Those who heard the music were mesmerised by Krishna’s flawless performance, however Titania soon fell on her knees, clutching her stomach in pain.

“W-What the hell’s happening?!” She grunted, before proceeding to cough up some blood. Her Aegislash was also weakened by the haunting melody, as it staggered in the air for a few seconds before fainting right beside its trainer. “T-This can’t be…” Titania called out weakly, before she too fainted from the attack.

“Tania!” Amaria cried out in fear, rushing over to her side along with a few others, with Krishna finishing his performance. “What did you do to her?!” Amaria demanded, glaring at the deity.

“Heheheh, the notes I play from my flute have a variety of effects, ranging from bolstering my allies, to crippling the enemy.” Krishna smirked.

Well then why’d you stop playing then? You could theoretically kill the entirety of your opposition with your Song of Death!

“It was foolish of her to challenge me, considering how powerful we are. However there’s still the matter of instilling it into your brains, and I have the perfect way to solve that problem.”

It was then that a portal suddenly appeared over the lobby portion of the headquarters, and from the portal emerged a colossal emerald green cobra that a few people recognised. Everyone present was frightened out of their minds as took a few steps back, with Amaria and a few others helping Titania and her Aegislash move back as well.

“Shesha, the great serpent of death and renewal will lead you all to Salvation. This is but a taste of the power that we possess. I am you light!” Krishna boldly declared, raising his arms in the air as Shesha let out an almighty hiss.

Ah, I see now. You wanted Shesha to finish them off, didn’t you? Fine by me, anything to end this fic as quickly as possible.

Oh and don’t think I didn’t notice that word for word copy of Krishna’s statement about Shesha, author.


“Ahhhhhhh…” Astolfo weakly cried out, trembling in fear. Seeing Shesha via a camera is one thing, but seeing it in real life was another thing entirely. Heck it looked as if it grew even larger than when he saw it for the first time. Damien was shivering in fright as well, however Zhong Kui comforted the terrified young man.

“No need to be scared, it won’t hurt you now that you’re on our side.” The warrior told him, and it seemed to work somewhat.

“It seems that the blasphemers are frightened over Shesha’s presence. Hopefully this’ll teach them not to cross us.” Maitreya commented, eyeing up the frightened partygoers.

“Indeed. However I’m more than willing to strike them down if they don’t get the message.” Odin promised, tightening his grip on Gungnir while Krishna briefly glanced at his wrist.

“It seems that we’ve run out of time for today. Let this be a lesson for you all on why you shouldn’t oppose us. Oh, and give my regards to the birthday girl if she pulls through.” Krishna taunted the crowed, as he and the Divine Powers teleported out of the area, with Shesha slithering back into the portal from which it emerged from.

WHY DIDN’T YOU ORDER YOUR FUCKING PET TO EAT THEM, YOU FUCKING MORON?!

The portal soon disappeared as everyone present looked at each other solemnly, as a few medics placed Titania and her Aegislash on stretchers before proceeding to move them to the medical facility where Ame and Alice are currently getting treated.

“What was once a day for celebration, quickly became a day of despair within a matter of minutes.” Micaiah commented bitterly, angry with herself over how Krishna and the Divine Powers ruined the birthday party.

“Don’t worry ma’am, we’ll find a way to deal with them tomorrow. I’m sure everyone here needs a good night’s sleep after what happened today.” Garret informed her. “There’s a few spare rooms you and your friends can use for the night.”

“That’s greatly appreciated, thank you very much.” Micaiah bowed in appreciation, as everyone that was still here started packing up the place, before heading to their rooms once the task was accomplished.

Oh finally I thought that chapter would never—it’s not over yet?!

Tsukiji Kongangi: Leader’s Quarters

The three leaders of the Divine Powers warped back into the room, with Damien in tow. A few seconds later, Zhong Kui and Medusa appeared in the room as well, the latter taking a closer look at the jewellery Maitreya handed to her earlier.

“Ah, such fine pieces of work. These would look so lovely on my most prized statue.” Medusa hissed with glee.

“As lovely as they are, we need to keep them as far away from the blasphemers as possible. Which is why I’m gonna entrust their safety to the Divine Vanguard.” Krishna informed her, making her pout in frustration.

“D-Divine Vanguard?” Damien inquired.

“A group of six powerful deities who have all pledged their support to the Divine Powers. They perform most of the ground work while we maintain the situation from here.” Odin answered.

And now they have their “elite” band of deities to counter the Relic Keepers, or whatever they were called. I couldn’t care less at this point.

“You’ve already met two members of the Divine Vanguard earlier today.” Maitreya added, gesturing to Zhong Kui and Medusa.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you sonny.” Zhong Kui greeted the young man politely.

“My, my. Krishna has a good eye when it comes to fine specimens such as yourself.” Medusa commented, gazing at Damien while her hair-snakes eyed him up curiously.

“In fact, right now would be a perfect opportunity to meet the other members of the Vanguard.” Krishna stated, as four powerful demons entered the room. “And here they are; why not introduce yourself to them?” He asked Damien, whom gulped nervously.

“Uh…hi there. I’m Damien…” He introduced himself nervously, scratching the back of his head.

Easy there Damian, there’s no need to fear the strawmen cosplaying as Shin Megami deities. The author will triumph over them in the end.

“I am Loki, trickster god of Norse mythology.” He introduced himself. Loki had long, wavy blonde hair and wore a leather suit that had holes in the back for his two large wings. “I’m surprised Odin hasn’t mentioned me to you earlier.” He quipped, causing Odin to grunt softly in response.

“I am Quetzalcoatl, Aztec god of the sun, sky and learning.” He introduced himself. He was a taller than average man who sported feathered wings on his arms and wore a brightly colored Aztec era outfit, with a matching crown on his head.

“I am Seth, Egyptian deity of deserts, storms and chaos.” He introduced himself. Seth was a large, black dragonic being that had sharp spines running down from the base of it’s neck to the tip of it’s tail. His large wings were like that of a bats, neatly folded to the beings sides.

“I am Baal, Cannan god of fertility, rain and thunder.” He introduced himself. Baal was a tall, muscular man with bronze-colored skin and wore a rather regal outfit. The most notable features about him was the large crown on his head that looked like the top half of a horned fish, with the fin reached down to his back, as well as the ornate goblet in his hand.

“Now that the introductions are out of the way, I have a task for you all. I need the six of you to guard a piece of jewellery each, so that the blasphemers can’t retrieve them.” Krishna ordered, as the six deities each took a piece of jewellery for themselves.

Ok, but you still haven’t told us what exactly you want with them yet.

“Heheheh, I oughta rub this in their faces.” Loki cackled.

“Ah, it shines as brightly as the sun I created.” Quetzalcoatl smiled softly.

“So long as my brother doesn’t intervene, I should be able to keep this safe.” Seth commented.

“Hmph, this offering will do for now.” Baal scoffed.

“Now that we’ve settled that matter, it’s time for our great plan to commence. Soon those fools would realise the purity of our salvation!” Krishna declared, ecstatic that his great plan is finally in motion.

Finally, it’s over. This fucking chapter sapped the energy from me. If it wasn’t the drawn out introductions of the author’s spank material, it was the idiocy of the villains showing up with their superweapon, only to leave shortly afterwards without using the damn thing. I hope to YHVH that the next chapter isn’t this painful.

What an intense chapter, but what are the traitors up to at this moment? You’ll find out in the next chapter.

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania (W.I.A)
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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GorillaGamer
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Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sun Sep 30, 2018 3:33 am

Another day, another chapter of Shin Megami Tensai: Card games on Demons. This chapter’s doesn’t have as much stupid as the previous chapter did; in fact it’s one of the tamer installments. But that doesn’t mean that it’s free from stupidity, oh no it isn’t.

Previously, Astolfo and friends attended Ame’s birthday party and were enjoying themselves. However the Divine Powers interrupted the party and stole several valuable relics, but not before converting Damien to their side

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 7: The next move

Ueno Apartment Penthouse: with the traitors

“So the heart of Reborn has been struck down; my only regret was that I wasn’t there to witness it.” Lin, commented, sipping from a glass of wine while looking out of the window, which had an impressive view of Tokyo at night. She alongside several of the traitors were using the penthouse as a base of operations.

They must have some lucrative jobs if they can all afford a penthouse suite to themselves. Almost makes me wonder why they’re waging war against the fangames to begin with.

“To be fair, she wasn’t killed on the spot, though there’s a good chance that she won’t pull through.” Sirius reminded her.

“Pfft, she’s no longer a threat to us.” Lin retorted, finishing her wine before tossing the glass aside. “Now our plan for total domination can finally go ahead.”

“My research into Delta Pokémon shall prove beneficial to you all!” Professor Maple grinned maniacally.

“Pffft, everyone knows that Shadow Pokémon are far superior!” Madelis shot back at the aging scientist.

“You’re both wrong, Relic Pokémon are the new future. I shall be the one to tame them.” Rick rebutted, puffing his chest out.

They’ll be the new future alright; a future lawsuit to bust your ass.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Professor Maple asked.

“Yo I heard about those Relic Pokémon, they’re a lot like the Delta Species that you obsess over.” Redi answered. “They look pretty slick if I say so myself!”

“The problem is that they’re rare as shit. I’d rather steal them from some weakling then go through the effort to find them myself.” Rick commented, crossing his arms.

“Putting your petty ambitions aside, it seems that the others have had some marginal success dealing with some of the other fangames.” Sirius interjected.

“Indeed. However they’ve only managed to take down insignificant games so far. Prism is the exception, however they had to rely on Nintendo to do the dirty work.” Lin retorted. “Though to be fair, having others do your dirty work isn’t a bad idea.”

Well if you’re upset with how they’re progressing, then why not help them out? Scratch that, why the hell is it taking so long for Nintendo to get off their asses and sue Ame and Co.?!

“Exactly. By shifting the blame onto Nintendo, we’ll be able to get away with our deeds!” Redi exclaimed. “How totally tubular!”

“Ugh! Please refrain from saying such tripe.” Professor Maple scolded the young man, whom flipped him the bird in response.

“The youth of today need to be taught some manners…” Madelis muttered, crossing her arms in disgust.

“By the way Madelis, I heard you discussed a plan with some of the others.” Sirius turned to her.

“Ah yes, we managed to enlist the assistance of the MS Waifu Army. Obviously, they’re nothing but disposable pawns to us, but as long as Krishna gets his souls I doubt he’d care about what we do.” Madelis replied.

I’m pretty sure that Krishna isn’t interested in a platter full of cum-stained souls, but whatever.

“I’ve heard a few things about the MS Waifu Army. They’re a contemptable bunch.” Lin scoffed. “Why Krishna would need such weaklings is beyond my understanding.”

“Perhaps it has to do with that Godslayer he found.” Rick proposed, capturing everyone’s attention.

“Godslayer?” Sirius inquired.

“Supposedly it’s a term for a human who can kill gods and demons; why Krishna didn’t give me that title is beyond me.” Rick replied. “Instead he granted it to that white-haired wimp from Insurgence.”

Hey don’t ask me, I’m just as confused as you about that decision.

“Audrey’s son? An interesting choice if I say so myself. Heck I didn’t even realised he joined our side.” Madelis commented.

“It was around the same time that Krishna crashed Ame’s party and knocked her out cold. A shame I didn’t get to have some fun with her before ditching those losers.” Rick added.

“Is there a teenager on our side who isn’t a pervert?” Professor Maple sighed.

“There’s me, dude. I’m not one for letting my kinks show themselves.” Redi chimed in.

“Let me rephrase that, are there any WORTHWHILE teenagers that aren’t perverts?” Professor Maple asked again, with Redi scoffing in disgust.

“Does it really matter if our subordinates can’t keep it in their pants?!” Sirius snapped. “So long as they do their damn job, I couldn’t care less about what they do in their spare time.”

“Pfft, whatever.” Professor Maple hissed, storming out of the room and slamming the door shut.

In-fighting between the villain strawmen, how interesting…

“Better stay away from that jackass for a while.” Redi muttered to himself.

“Now that the fool has left the room, allow me to divulge to you my next scheme.” Lin began, with the others moving in closer to hear about it. “There’s a rally being hosted by someone who opposes the fangames, within the next couple weeks; we plant a few bombs and detonate them, killing hundreds of citizens and having Shesha feast on their souls.”

“But wouldn’t that be counterproductive?” Redi inquired.

“Think about it; if those who protest these games get blown up, it’ll turn popular opinion against the fangame community. A genius plan courtesy of my leader.” Sirius openly praised the idea. “However we’ll need a scapegoat; got any ideas?”

“As a matter of fact, I do. That waste of space Texan will be the sacrifice.” Lin replied coldly, sending chills down the backs of everyone except Sirius.

Lin really needs to cut back on the breath mints.

“W-Why him?” Rick inquired.

“He’s done nothing but complain about these supposed agendas that the fangames have in them. As far as I’m concerned, he’s nothing more than a lamb for the slaughter.” Lin added.

“I’ve got no problem sacrificing him.” Madelis chimed in. “We’ll tell him about the plan, but omit the part about his sacrifice.”

“Impressive, you do have a spine after all.” Lin complimented.

“Working for Madame X requires possessing a durable spine.” Madelis replied. “Anyway, I think we should let the others know before we start working on the plan.”

“Very well, we’ll do that once they get back.” Sirius told her, as they went their separate ways to deal with their personal matters.

Masturbating to Pokémon Reborn is a rather personal matter indeed, coming from someone who had had experience with that sort of thing.

Pokémon Fangame Headquarters: Medical facility

Several of Ame’s co-workers and friends were waiting patiently outside the room alongside Astolfo and his friends, as they waited patiently for the test results to come back. Charlotte and Amaria in particular, were hoping their loved ones would pull through. However the group was soon interrupted by the arrival of a woman a year or so younger than Serra, with Charlotte running up to her to give her a hug.

The woman was of above average height, and had short royal blue and pink hair that reached her shoulders as well as red eyes like her younger sister. Her outfit consisted of a royal blue, long-sleeve, button-up shirt that had pink shoulder pads that were decorated with plastic spikes, royal blue jeans and matching color boots. She was quite attractive, but had an intimidating aura around her that warned people not to cross her, lest they suffer painful consequences.

Saphira, one of Reborn’s more polarizing characters. Only interaction I had with her was when some dipshits wanted her to tear me apart for supposedly saying mean things about the game. Boy did that give me a few hoots.

“Charlotte! I heard about what happened earlier from Adrienn, is everything alright?” she inquired.

“I’m fine, Saphira.” Charlotte replied uneasily. “But Alice and Ame were electrocuted, and Titania became sick all of a sudden. They also took my earring.”

“What?! How could they have known about the earring?” the now named Saphira inquired.

“Lin told them about it; she joined up with them a while ago.” Charlotte answered.

“So she decided to show her true colors? That means that I won’t have to hold back anymore…” Saphira muttered ominously, dark thoughts forming in her mind.

So I guess there’s gonna be a serving of victory rape in this fic then?

Several of the other visitors felt the sudden change in atmosphere and gulped nervously. However it was then that the door opened as the doctor stepped out to give a status report.

The doctor was fairly tall and well-built, and had short blonde hair and blue eyes. He wore a standard doctor’s uniform, but only having it over the left side. This was Dr. Sigmund Connal, a fairly controversial figure in the Reborn region. Following his sister’s suicide, he experimented with Electroconvulsive therapy to see if it would’ve saved her. The Reborn government were a bit weary of it, but allowed the tests to go on, only for them to ban it quickly once they discovered just how dangerous it was. Charlotte, Laura and Saphira were a few of the test subjects, and weren’t too pleased about being test subjects. Following the ban, Dr. Connal made a final appeal, but after a relentless beatdown courtesy of Saphira, he yielded and accepted the ban.

Hold the phone, why is he here? Dr. Connal was an antagonist in Pokémon Reborn, so why did the author make him a good guy? Was it to balance out the influx of traitors the author dumped onto Krishna’s lap?

“What’s the situation doctor?” Amaria inquired, fearing the worst possible scenario.

“It’s nothing like I’ve seen before; Ame and Alice suffered serious internal damage, but they only have a few small burns on their back. And I know a fair bit about electrical wounds.” Dr. Connal reported.

“Gee, I wonder why…” Charlotte dryly retorted, before her expression became more serious. “So are they going to pull through?”

“Well I gave them the standard treatment for this sort of thing, and it seems that they’re recovering, albeit slowly.” He added.

“Good.” Saphira replied coldly, staring harshly at him. “If they don’t pull through I’ll make sure you’re buried right next to them!”

“And I won’t give you any flowers!”

Dr. Connal gulped nervously, before clearing his throat. “What has me confused is what happened to Titania; her sickness wasn’t like anything I’ve seen before. She’s recovered for the most part but—“ was all he could say before Amaria bolted past him and ran into the room, with everyone following behind her.

“Oh Tania!” Amaria expressed her relief, kneeling beside the hospital bed. “I’m so relieved you’re alive.”

“I’ll be fine Amy; I’m more pissed off with myself.” Titania replied, gently petting Amaria’s head. “Had I not been distracted by that charlatans words, I would’ve been able to wipe the floor with his sorry hide.”

And had Krishna not farted around like a moron, you’d all be snake chow by now.

“Don’t blame yourself, you had no idea he would’ve pulled a stunt like that.” Amaria said, before getting back up on her feet. “Rest assured, I’ll make sure that he pays for what he did to you.” Meanwhile, the others were checking up on Alice and Ame to see how they were going. They were still sleeping peacefully, which helped alleviate their worries.

“Don’t worry Alice, I’m going to make sure that they learn why you don’t mess with my family.” Charlotte vowed to herself, confidence coursing through her veins. “Awesome does run in my family after all.”

“Spoken like a true Belrose.” Saphira complimented her younger sister. “Anyway, with Ame out of commission for the moment, Adrienn has taken it upon xemself to step up as leader of the Reborn League.”

“We would’ve put in a vote, but SOMEONE had to throw the voting hat away.”

“That’s good to hear.” Astolfo chimed in. “Uh, did we introduce ourselves yet?”

“I learnt about you lot from Adrienn; that Sothe fellow was rather eager for my autograph for some reason.” Saphira replied. “Just don’t get in my way and I’m sure we’d both get out of this alive.”

“Alright then, I can work with that.” Astolfo replied. “So does anyone have a plan yet?”

“Simple, we find these bastards and break their necks.” Saphira answered. “Even if we have to drag them out of whatever cave they’re hiding in.”

I’m pretty sure their cave comes with a few water beds and a Jacuzzi.

“An effective plan, but we’ll need to tarnish their reputation first, lest we turn them into martyrs.” Micaiah commented.

“Alright then, how do you propose we tarnish their reputation?” Amaria asked, walking over to the group.

“We spread news of the attack on Ame’s party; it would make them look bad in front of the world.” Micaiah suggested. “Support for us should be bolstered by this.”

I’m surprised there hasn’t been a news story about the incident at all. I guess deities randomly showing up to parties is common place in Tokyo.

“Heh, that’s pretty decent actually.” Saphira praised the idea. “Adrienn’s going to be giving a speech soon, we could tell xem about the plan since I’m sure xyr would be more than happy to help us.”

“Alright! We’ve got a plan to deal with those creeps.” Astolfo cheered. “They’re gonna see it and start quaking in their boots.”
“They’re not the type to throw in the towel after watching a video denouncing them.” Charlotte interjected. “Besides, we gotta get the relics back as soon as possible.”

“That reminds me, what exactly are those relics Krishna wanted?” Chevalier inquired.

“Plot MacGuffins the author hastily inserted in order to justify this stupid crossover.”

“Long story short, they’re the keys to a meteorite that was supposedly the birthplace of Arceus. Arceus was said to be the creator of the universe, most notably the various regions where Pokémon thrive in.” Saphira explained.

“Wait a second; the Divine Powers spoke about disposing of someone known as the Creator God. Could they have been referring to this Arceus?” Astolfo inquired.

And here’s another reason why this crossover is fucking stupid; each franchise this author slapped into this mess have their own higher beings watching over them. Is Arceus and YHVH on the same side? Enemies? Father and Son? This fucking gibberish makes no sense whatsoever.

“Wouldn’t have a clue to be honest.” Saphira shrugged her shoulders. “The relics are most likely going to be guarded by some of their toughest demons, so we’ll need to get stronger if we’re gonna get them back.”

“Alright then, we’ll go talk to Adrienn about the plan.” Chevalier replied, as the visitors proceeded to leave the room with Charlotte and Amaria saying farewell to their lovers.

0000

The group had arrived in the meeting room where Adrienn was having a chat with some of the other fangame committee leaders. Astolfo soon noticed that Roland was with them as well, though he was busy chatting with Serra.

And I see that the author avatar is still hovering by Ice Babe’s side; why did I expect anything different?

“Ah, you’ve arrived.” Adrienn called out to the newcomers, as they took their seats. “How are they?”

“The doc said they were fine, though they’ll be out for a while.” Saphira answered. “Guess that means you’re in charge for now.”

“Oh thank heavens they’re gonna make it. We were going to visit them once the meetings done.” Serra replied, referring to herself and Roland.

“Yeah, I gotta apologise to them as well.” Roland added. “Had I not been so useless back then, they wouldn’t have been hurt by those monsters.”

Mate, everyone became useless the moment the plot demanded the villains do something for once.

“Don’t blame yourself Roly; there wasn’t much any of us could’ve done.” Micaiah consoled the blonde man. “At the very least we can make a plan to ensure that no more innocent people get caught up in their twisted scheme.”

“Heehee, you’ve grown attached to Serra, haven’t you?” Astolfo giggled, causing Roland to start blushing like crazy.

Of course he has! He’s like some lonely weeaboo clinging onto his soiled dakimakura; probably the same one the author fantasizes about!

“Hahaha, he is rather charming, I’ll give him that.” Serra giggled as well. “Anyway, Melia has an idea on what our next move will be. Why don’t we hear her out?”

“Thank you Serra.” Melia replied, before clearing her throat and removing the tablecloth from the whiteboard, revealing a spider-web of sorts listing off the high-ranking members of the Divine Powers. “As you know, the Divine Powers have several powerful gods and demons rallying under their banner. Then of course, there are the traitors, including a certain someone I won’t name. To take on the deities at this very moment would be a disastrous choice to make, so we’ll start off by focusing on the traitors and their human followers.”

“It makes sense when you think about it; a lot of these deities gain their powers when people believe in them fervently. To take away their followers is to take away their power.” Garret chimed in. “I’m down for it!”

Was that how Ame survived getting attacked by Odin; his follower count was low? The big guy needs to set up a Twitter account as soon as possible.

“However there’s the small matter of finding out where the supporters are rallying.” Shiv commented. “There’s Tsukiji Konganji, but the security over there is extremely tight. No way are we going through the front gate.”

“That’s why we learn about where they’re having a rally and interrupt it, just like they did with ours.” Melia replied, as she pointed to another area of Japan. “There’s talk of a rally being held at Kinshicho, and with some of the traitors hosting it nonetheless.”

“So who’s hosting this rally?” Astolfo inquired.

“As of right now, we only know that Zenith, Neved and Lavia are organising the rally, though I wouldn’t be surprised if Lavius was pitching in as well.” Melia answered.

Welp, looks like we know who’s gonna die next.

“I’ll make sure that they’ll regret crossing us in their final moments on this earth.” Saphira vowed, clenching his fist tightly.

“I understand your frustration, but we’ll need them alive so we can interrogate them about any plans they might have up their sleeves.” Melia told her.

“Fine, I’ll bide my time. Revenge is a dish best served cold after all.” Saphira replied.

Setting aside how bloodthirsty she is for a moment, let’s talk about this whole revenge thing for a moment. Dr. Connal unintentionally harmed Saphira and her sisters, and got the shit beaten out of him. Whereas the traitors acted pathetically, which somehow warrants their imminent and painful death. How the hell does that work?!

“What about the relics they took from us?” Serra inquired. “Surely you have a way to reclaim them.”

“Unfortunately it won’t be that easy.” Melia replied sadly. “The Divine Powers have an elite ensemble of demons under their command, known as the Divine Vanguard. Each member is guarding one of the relics, and have established domains throughout Tokyo. So not only would finding them be hard, but defeating them would be even harder.”

“Hold the phone, I have an idea!” Sothe cried out, surprising everyone in the room.

“Oh hello, I forgot you were here Sothe.” Micaiah giggled. “Anyway, what is this fantastic idea you have?”

“We duel them.” Sothe answered, bringing out his duel disk. “Most demons are usually honor bound to accept any challenge from a mortal like us. Therefore we can run loops around them with our top notch duelling skills!”

Great, looks like there’s gonna be a least six more duels in this fic. I wonder what unique and diverse strategies I’ll see in those chapters…

“There’s one problem with your plan mate; you’re the only ones with duel disks.” Garret replied. “Are ya expecting us to sit back and twiddle our thumbs?”

“Oh god no, I wouldn’t leave you out of the action.” Sothe reassured the man. “Since the deities would have minions beside them, you can use your Pokémon to crush them. Then there’s the traitors who would have their own Pokémon with them as well.”

“A Pokémon battle you say?” Shiv chimed in, an intrigued look in his eyes. “Perhaps I’ll get my sister to help us out.”

“You can’t be serious! She’ll kill us all!” Garret exclaimed, a look of terror in his eyes.

“I know…” Shiv sighed, resting his chin on his hand. “But Aurora’s the best chance we have at countering the Divine Powers.”

“Aurora?” Astolfo inquired.

Oh boy, as someone who played Desolation, let me tell you; she’s batshit crazy, and I love her for it!

“My older sister. She’s very talented at Pokémon battles, but can be utterly remorseless at times. And when she gets angry…” Shiv began, shivering in his seat. “It won’t end nicely for anyone involved.”

“True, but you can’t deny she’s quite the looker.” Melia chimed in.

“If she found out that you said that about her, it’s not gonna end well for you.” Shiv retorted.

“You do know you just gave the author more fuel for his fantasies, right?”

“Ah well, I’m sure we can sort it out without tearing each other’s throats out.” The blonde girl replied. “In all seriousness though, I’m fine with Aurora helping us out.”

“It’s settled then.” Shiv called out, throwing his arms in the air. “I just hope that last year’s incident doesn’t repeat itself.”

“Hmmm? What happened back then?” Roland inquired.

“Long story short, some kid named Rodney kept annoying with her by spouting some cheap flirts at her. They still haven’t found the body to this day…” Serra informed him.

“Ah, but I jest; she simply got sick of hearing him spout jokes about steamed hams.”

“Oh…” Roland gulped nervously. “Guess I better watch what I say.”

“That would be recommended.” Shiv replied, getting up off his seat. “Well there’s no point waiting around anymore; so if Adrienn, Melia and Garret can come with me to visit her, then that would be appreciated.”

“Why not? Been a while since I last saw here.” Garret chimed in, as the group of four got up and made their way out of the room. “Oh and if Astolfo wants to come along, he’s more than welcome to.”

“Sure thing!” the pinkette replied, hopping out of his chair and following the group.

Why him? Is Aurora into anime traps?

Naha: Okinawa Island

The small group had arrived at the entrance to a rather extravagant manor overlooking the large city. Shiv took a step forward and knocked on the large brass door, before stepping back.

“Who’s there?” A voice inquired from inside the manor.

“It’s your brother, Aurora. We need to talk about something.” Shiv answered.

“Is that so?” She replied. “Then come on in. The rest can come in as well, so long as they don’t make a fool of themselves.”
Shiv proceeded to enter the manor while the rest of the group were a little hesitant about entering the manor, before Shiv snapped them out of their chain of thought and proceeded to follow him in. The manor was extravagantly decorated with rather macabre accessories, most notably the grim paintings in the main hallway. The group made their way to the living room, which had a fairly tall bookshelf that was full of books, most notable unsolved crimes and infamous serial killers. Sitting on a recliner by herself was Aurora, who was busy reading a novel.

No doubt it’s packed to the brim with edge.

“It’s been a while since we last saw each other Shiv. I was hoping you’d visit a bit more often.” Aurora replied wistfully, however Shiv caught onto the act.

“You know why I can’t visit you more often!” he snapped back. “Now put the book down; we need your help with something.”

“Very well.” she replied, slipping a bookmark in the novel and placing it on the side table. Aurora had short black hair that was done up into two pigtails, tied up with red ribbons, matching red eyes and had a slender figure. Her outfit consisted of a simple black sleeveless dress skirt, black leggings and matching black boots. She was certainly beautiful, but was very deadly, especially when angered. “So what is it you all wanted?”

Sure, throw another chick on the author’s plate. It’s not like he’ll knock it back anytime soon.

“Uhh…we were wondering if you would help us deal with the traitors.” Melia requested.

“Traitors, what are you talking about?” Aurora asked a counter-question.

“Several of our colleagues have chosen to side with the Divine Powers; Hardy was killed while acting as a mole on our behalf.” Adrienn reported to her.

“Aw, I liked Hardy. He was alright.” Aurora replied. “Guess that means I don’t have to hold back anymore.”

Saphira said the exact same thing in this very chapter! Fucking hell, do all of you get off on the idea of revenge?!

“Hey, didn’t Saphira say the exact same thing?” Astolfo inquired, as Aurora turned to stare at the pinkette, a look of intrigue on her face.

“Well what do we have here?” Aurora inquired, a twisted smirk on her face. “Seems like my brother has made a new friend; and a cute one at that.”

Yep, seems I was right on the money.

“Aw shucks.” Astolfo replied, blushing like crazy. “I’m Astolfo. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Cute and polite? Seems my brother found a winner.” Aurora began, before she started sniffing the air around Astolfo. “This scent…I know I’ve smelt something like this before, but I can’t remember.”

“C-Can I help you miss?” Astolfo asked.

That’s how citizens of Ayrith begin their mating ritual, sniffing the partner they want to mate with.

“I’ll be keeping my eye on you; there’s something about you I find, interesting to say the least.” Aurora admitted.

“So are you going to help us or not?” Garret asked. “Unfortunately we don’t have all day to stand around and do nothing.”

“Sure, I’ll tag along.” Aurora answered, getting up off her recliner. “But I won’t be taking orders from any of you, got it?”

“We can work with that.” Adrienn accepted the agreement, as the group proceeded to leave the manor, their confidence gaining a nice boost.

And that’s this chapter over and done with. I read a bit of the next chapter, and I know I’m in for a wild ride, so it should pick up from there. I also have an interesting proposal for you all.

If anyone reading this is interested in mocking a chapter themselves, they’re free to do so, as long as they contact me in advance. I understand if you’re unable to, and I respect that; I just figured I could spice things up a little. Though if you want to tackle a chapter, I’ll let you know that I’ve already got my sights on Chapter 9. I am also more than happy to go into some more details about the Pokemon fangames, in case you want some more information about them.


A little slow, but the next chapter should pick thing up as it’ll have a duel and introduce a couple more villains for the heroes to defeat.

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania (W.I.A)
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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StabbyKobold
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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by StabbyKobold » Mon Oct 01, 2018 4:02 pm

Good going with the mock, GorillaGamer. As much as I'd like to volunteer for mocking duty, I'm afraid I just don't have the fan experience credentials to crack jokes at any of the fandoms involved in this mess.

I will however share my current observations. Going through this, I've isolated a few things that might be the reason why its such a tiring read.
Each chapter seems involve many, if not all or multiple instances, of the elements I'm going to list here. They are as follows:
  • Introductions of new characters, complete with full paragraph of what they look like, what they're wearing, and background information.
  • Meta-commentary on Pokémon fangames or Yugioh disguised as banter between characters to express the author's opinions.
  • An appearance of the Divine Party Crashers, where they repeat their stated goals and make a pointless show of power without impact.
  • Discussions about or retelling of what happened in the previous chapter, usually because every new character must be informed directly
  • Minor antagonists of the "evilly laughing, arrogant douchebag" variety, who are dispatched without any sort of tension, because author fiat.

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GorillaGamer
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Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sat Oct 06, 2018 8:28 am

@StabbyKobold: I understand your decision and I respect it. That said, I appreciate you listing off some major grips I have with this fic, as this chapter contains even more of them.

You know, I originally thought that this was set during the events of Shin Megami Tensai IV: Apocalypse, given the presence of Dagda and the Divine Powers. But after this chapter, I’m not even sure if that’s the case anymore.


Previously, Astolfo and a few representatives of the fangame community met up with Aurora, the mysterious yet deadly sister of Shiv. Meanwhile, the traitors have been planning a Pro-Divine Powers rally in Kinshicho, as well as a more twisted plan in the future.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 8: March of the machines!

Tsukiji Kongangi: Meeting room

Krishna was busy reading the latest report from his agents in the field, and the news couldn’t be better. Several more deities have pledged their allegiance to the Divine Powers, with the ancient gods in particular voicing their support for the movement. Additionally, several anti-fangame groups have cropped up in various nations around the world and have begun a campaign against Pokémon Reborn.

An entire army, solely dedicating their lives to rebel against a fairly harmless fangame. Well it beats getting eaten by demons, so I can understand the appeal.

It was then that someone began knocking on the door, capturing the deity’s attention.

“My lord, the two men you wanted to see are here.” The demon spoke through the door. “Shall I let them in?”

“Obviously. After all they came here to seek salvation.” Krishna replied, as the door opened and two men entered the room. The first man was middle-aged and was of average height and had short blonde hair and a thick moustache. His outfit consisted of a set of regal white robes that were made from high-quality silk. The second man was a bespectacled, middle-aged man with short black hair. His outfit of choice was a black business suit that was made of high quality materials.

Oh boy, more villains that Krishna purchased off of Amazon. Wonder who he got this time.

“Greetings gentleman, I am Krishna of the Divine Powers.” He introduced himself, gesturing for the duo to sit down. “I’d like to know a bit more about you two.”

“Certainly. I am Lekain, Duke of Gaddos and the Vice-Minister of the Begnion Empire.” the blonde man introduced himself, taking a seat.

Lekain, Vice-Minister of the Begnion Empire and one of the nastier characters in the Fire Emblem franchise. Normally I’d scoff at his appearance, but Micaiah’s a character in this fic, so I’ll begrudgingly let him pass.

“I am Tayama, leader of the Hachibu Rengou Ashura-kai.” The bespectacled man introduced himself, taking a seat as well. “Let’s get down to business, shall we?”

What I won’t let pass is the presence of this guy, Tayama. Anyone who’s familiar with Shin Megami Tensai knows that he dies during the story of SMT: IV, which is before Krishna and his merry band of party crashers made their debut. The author took and already damaged canon and violated it further to suit his petty mission of temporary wish-fulfillment, and it sickens me!

“Indeed. A little birdie told me that the two of you wish to assist me in disposing of the Pokémon fangames.” Krishna commented.

“Of course I want them gone! They’re nothing more than feminist propaganda!” Lekain snorted. “No wonder the Dawn Brigade love them so much.”

Why hello there Misogynist Strawman No.795. I hope you’re as nice as the rest of your brothers.

“Well I did see the Priestess of Dawn attend the last rally we interrupted, so there’s some merit to your statement.” Krishna replied, causing Lekain to go wide-eyed.

“Micaiah’s in Tokyo?!” he demanded an answer.

“Indeed she is.” Krishna answered. “I take it that she’s a wanted fugitive in your homeland.”

“That bitch has been a thorn in my side for a long time now, especially since she wants to marry that barn-bred thief Sothe, who she dotes on as a younger brother. It’s sickening.” Lekain growled.

I see you’re a member of the ‘Micaiah and Sothe are siblings.’ Party. And if you’re meant to be their representative, then I fear for the party’s future.

“I thought you senators were trying to get incest legalised.” Tayama retorted. “Anyway, I have no problem with these games brainwashing the masses. My issue is that they’re preaching the wrong message and encourage the destabilization of society.”

“What are you trying to say?” Krishna inquired.

“What I want is for these games to preach the message I want them to preach. My Ashura-Kai are maintaining the peace throughout Tokyo, and these games are gonna destabilize the power base I spent years building up.” Tayama continued. “Plus there are some girls in these games that I want to make a harem out of.”

Oh sorry, I didn’t notice you over there Perverted Strawman No.469. I was too busy ignoring your dumbass comment about how Reborn’s telling people to destroy society.

“A harem you say? How interesting.” Lekain commented, a lecherous grin on his face.

“I have a list of girls that I plan on keeping for myself; the rest can get sent to one of my many whorehouses around Tokyo.” Tayama took out a list from his jacket and showed it to the other two.

“Well I’ll be, that’s an impressive list you got there. It seems I’m not the only man with good taste around here.” Lekain commented.

“I do question your inclusion of those sub-humans you’ve named; can’t see what’s so appealing about fucking a wolf.”

“Hate to break it to you, but you might have to remove Ame and her daughter from that list. Odin struck them down with his trusty spear, and I doubt they’ll pull through.” Krishna replied, struggling to hide the glee in his voice.

“Good. That’ll teach them not to mass produce their garbage propaganda.” Lekain snorted, crossing his arms.

“A shame, but there are other girls on the list who have a higher priority.” Tayama replied. “Take Serra for example; she is to be my crown jewel. And boy is she a splendid jewel.”

“Well you’re a little late on that, apparently she already found someone else.” Krishna replied. “I noticed that she was besides one of the Servants of Fate; Roland if I recall his name correctly.”

“What?!” Tayama growled, slamming his fist on the table. “How could I have been beaten by some punk?!”

Calling it here; Tayama and Roland are gonna duel each other, with Serra as the prize. This shit is so trite and cliché, it can be seen from a mile away.

“That won’t matter in the long run, once we defeat these games she’ll be yours for the taking, as well as all the other girls on your list.” Lekain replied. “I’ll be fine with Micaiah though, I and the senators loyal to me want to punish her personally…”

“So do I have your support?” Krishna asked the two men.

“Sure; the Begnion Empire will assist you in capturing the wanted fugitive, as well as stamping out this propaganda being shoved down our children’s throats.” Lekain responded to the question.

“Alright, I’ll help you guys out. So long as you keep your end of the bargain, that is.” Tayama answered.

“Wonderful! I can tell that this would be a most fruitful alliance for us all.” Krishna smiled casually.

A fruitful alliance that involves harem-hungering yakuza bosses and bigoted senators. I question your taste in allies, Krishna.

Onjuku Beach: Tokyo

Chevalier D’eon decided to go to the beach on his own one day, to take a quick break following the last few days. However Jack Frost hand managed to sneak in the esky while Chevalier was distracted, with the latter finding out an hour later. The blonde decided that bringing him back home was more trouble than it was worth and allowed the fairy to come with him.

“Now remember Frosty, if the heat gets a bit too much for you then you can hide in the esky for a while.” Chevalier reminded him.

“Yes-siree, I’ll be safe from the summer hee-at in there!” Jack Frost quipped. The duo kept walking towards the beach when Chevalier spotted someone using a pay phone nearby, somebody who looked oddly familiar.

Great, either it’s another fangame character, or it’s more of the author’s spank material. Then again, both of them are the same thing now that I think about it.

“…alright then, I’ll see you when I come back from my vacation. Good bye.” The woman said her farewells before hanging up the phone and began heading in Chevalier’s direction, only to stop in her tracks upon seeing the young man.

“Chevalier? Oh it’s been too long since I last saw you.” She called out, hugging the young man.

“B-Be gentle Boudica. Y-You’re a lot stronger than you look.” Chevalier gasped, before he was freed from her tight grasp.

“Hehehe, my bad.” Boudica giggled lightly. Boudica was one of the most famous Servants of Fate who hailed from Britannia, with her trademark long red hair, blue eyes and a curvy figure that had a fair bit of muscle on it. Her outfit consisted of a white lace-up shirt with Juliet sleeves that showed a fair bit of cleavage, a red plated skirt, thigh-high boots and a billowing white cape. Additionally she had an ornate crown on her head. “How have you been?”

Oh, ok. A quick google search tells me that this is a Fate character, based off of the famous queen who fought off the Roman armies in Ancient Britannia during the 1st century. Based on her figure, I have a sneaking suspicion on why she’s in this fic.

“The past few years have been amazing. Not only did I reunite with my friend Astolfo after all these years, but I met the sweetest girl of all time, who happens to be a top notch duelist as well.” Chevalier recalled, with Jack Frost hopping on top of his head to get a better look at her. “Oh this is—“

“Jack Frost? I know since he’s but one of Britannia’s most recognisable spirits.” Boudica cut him off unintentionally, gently stroking his chin. “He’s just as cute as I imagined him to be.”

“Hee-ho-ho! Guess you got good taste after all, hee-ho!” Jack Frost quipped back. “There’s nobody who could resist my dashing looks, ho.”

“Right then…” Boudica trailed off before changing the subject as they began walking to the beach. “How’s Astolfo going by the way?”

“Yeah he’s alright. Unfortunately he’s been too busy dealing with the latest issue at hand to relax with us.” Chevalier answered.

“Latest issue?” she inquired.

Oh boy, get ready for another info-dump on past events.

“This is a fairly long story so bear with me; it all started when Roland decided to visit us for a few weeks. Blair and I had gotten back from helping Ame set up the rally celebrating the release of the Pokémon fangames she and her friends had been developing for years, when she gave us tickets for the six of us to attend the rally; me, Blair, Astolfo, Roland, Micaiah and Sothe. Once we arrived there, we took our places as Ame and the representatives conduced their speeches. Things were going great until a bunch of lunatics stormed the stage, calling themselves the Divine Powers.” Chevalier began.

“Divine Powers?” Boudica asked.

“A bunch of ancient gods lead by Krishna; they protested the fangames by saying that they prevent humanity from attaining salvation, whatever that means.” Chevalier answered. “Anyway, things go quite for a while as the group and I were invited to Ame’s birthday party. But who would show up to ruin it than Krishna and his cronies. Not only was Ame and her daughter electrocuted by that brute Odin, but they tried to scare us by showing Shesha off to us. Who is Shesha you ask? A gigantic snake that consumes the souls of the living as per Krishna’s orders.”

Did you also tell her that you didn’t do anything to stop them because you’re fucking useless?

“No wonder Astolfo’s exhausted if he’s busy dealing with angry deities and their pet snake.” Boudica commented.

“On the plus side, Roland’s met this girl he’s interested in, so I highly doubt he’d stare at you anymore.” Chevalier added, surprising the redhead.

The author really wants to hold his iron-tight grip on Ice Babe to make sure nobody else has a chance with her.

“Seriously?!” she exclaimed. “Who would’ve thought that Roland of all people would meet someone?”

“It surprised me as well but hey, so long as they treat each other nicely, I’m fine with it.” Chevalier replied. The duo had arrived at the beach and were about to set up for the day, when they were confronted by a hooded figure who stared at them ominously.

How nice of the hooded figure to just appear out of nowhere to threaten the protagonists. Now take off that hood so that we can see which Total Drama character you are.

“Identify yourself!” Chevalier demanded, bringing out his duel disk while Boudica unsheathed her sword and pointed it at the enemy.

“Hehehe, alright then.” The figure chuckled, yanking their cloak off and throwing it in the air. The mysterious figure was a man in his mid-20s with short blonde hair and had a pair of shades over his eyes. His outfit consisted of a red t-shirt, cream coloured jeans, and a black, sleeveless leather jacket. He also wore a bandana that looked like the United States flag on his head.

“Y-You’re Bandit Keith!” Chevalier exclaimed, with the man laughing in response.

Oh ok, finally we get another Yugioh character in this fic, and it’s Bandit Keith to boot. Dashguy will be mighty pleased with this development.

“Seems like you did your homework if you know who I am.” Bandit Keith mocked the petite man. “How nice of your mommy to come along so you can cry on her shoulders once I wipe the floor with you!”

“Watch your tounge, lest I cut it out of your mouth!” Boudica threated the duelist, raised his hands in the air.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. No need to get worked up, I just wanna challenge the kid to a duel.” Bandit Keith replied.

“Besides, I’m a 100% certified American. I’m nothing like those filthy Romans that you hate.”

“After all, I wanna get my title back, and my clients are gonna help me with that.”

“Client?” Chevalier asked, with Bandit Keith laughing like crazy in response.

“Some cool cat by the name of Krishna wanted me to duel you dweebs.” Bandit Keith answered.

“Y-You’re with the Divine Powers?!” The petite blonde exclaimed.

“Yep; the Divine Powers told me that it was thanks to those shitty fangames that I lost my title as the U.S Duel Monsters Champion. That’s why I’m gonna take my anger out on you saps and help them destroy those games!” Bandit Keith declared. “On the flipside, you’ll be helping me reclaim my glory.”

How did—you know what, I’m not even going to bother. This buffoon seriously believe that Bandit Keith’s loss at Pegasus was due to Pokemon Reborn’s existence. Then again, I’m pretty sure that Reborn would be right up Pegasus’ alley.

“Destroying something a lot of people put their heart and soul into creating it, just so you can relive your glory days; what a selfish piece of work you are.” Boudica scoffed in disgust.

“If you really want to crush me that badly, you can do so once I wipe the floor with your son.” Bandit Keith sneered. “Besides, that crown would look amazing on my head.”

What’s this, no mention of rape? It seems like this chapter ain’t all bad after all.

“Ok first of all, we’re not related. And secondly, if you wanna duel that badly, then I’m game!” Chevalier declared, activating his duel disk.

“Hee-ho-ho, this is gonna be exciting!” Jack Frost cheered, hopping into the esky and tossing a cold drink at Boudica. “Here you go; this’ll beat the summer hee-at.”

“Thanks I guess.” Boudica replied, sitting beside the esky. “Let’s just hope that Chevalier can out duel a former champion.”

“Let’s duel!” Chevalier and Bandit Keith declared at the same time, drawing their opening hand.

Get ready for another match of Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Duels! How’s the counter, Steve?

Read the Rulebook, Dumbass: 3

Thank you.


Chevalier: 4000

Bandit Keith: 4000


“I’ll take the first turn, starting things off with Charge of the Light Brigade.” Chevalier declared, milling a few cards before adding a monster to his hand. “And I’ll summon the friend I retrieved; Garoth, Lightsworn Warrior!”

A muscular warrior decked in shining white armor appeared on the battlefield, twirling his axe in his hands before pointing it at Bandit Keith, who smirked in response.

“Now that’s a warrior I’d like to spar with.” Boudica admitted to Jack Frost.

Yes, “spar with”. I see where you’re coming from.

“Eh, I’m more dashing than hee is.” the frosty spirit replied.

“I think I’ll end my turn with a card facedown.” Chevalier added, as Bandit Keith began laughing like crazy.

“Oh man, this’ll be easier than I thought!” Keith taunted, drawing his card. “I’ll summon this baby, Ally of Justice Core Destroyer!”

Allies of Justice, an archetype built to deal with Light-based decks, and were barely able to do that to any sort of efficiency. Oh sure, they had a few cards that were useful, but they’re pretty outdated nowadays.

A mechanical quadruped made out of silver plating scuttled onto the field and stared down Garoth. Chevalier took a step back in fear, already knowing how the battle will end.

“But I won’t stop there, I’ll equip Core Destroyer with Gravity Blaster, enabling it to gain 400ATK once per turn!” Bandit Keith added, as a large blaster was attached to the machine’s head, a great power overflowing in its body.

ATK (1200-1600)

“I activate my face down card, Light Spiral in response to your spell!” Chevalier interjected.

“Heheheh, that dinky little lightshow ain’t gonna help ya.” Bandit Keith taunted. “Now Core Destroyer, disintegrate that steroid junky with your Darkness Beam!”

The machine charged up its laser momentarily before firing it at the warrior, with Chevalier being forced to watch his monster get disintegrated.

Oh come on, you made my toast disappear! Now what am I going to eat?!

“I’ll set two cards facedown and end my turn. Your move, punk!” Bandit Keith called out.

“A-Alright then, I draw!” Chevalier called out, as he began analysing Keith’s field. Not only does Core Destroyer prevent him from making an offense, but his facedown cards could cause serious trouble. Still he did have a plan, albeit a risky one.

“I’ll set a monster facedown, and set a card facedown to end my turn.” Chevalier said. “Your move.”

“Indeed it is.” Keith grinned, drawing a card. “Now I’ll activate Gravity Blaster’s effect once more, giving my monster another boost.”

ATK (1600-2000)

“I got this in the bag; destroy his facedown monster, Core Destroyer!” Keith demanded, as his monster began charging up another big blast.

“Gotcha! I’ll activate my Dimensional Prison!” Chevalier retorted, as the machine was banished into an unescapable void.

Nice job wasting a powerful trap to deal with a threat that can be dealt with fairly easily.

“Y-You runt!” Keith growled. “You got lucky punk!”

“Was it luck, or has the champ grown soft over time.” Chevalier taunted, angering the pro duelist.

“Tch, I’ll set a monster facedown and end my turn with another card facedown.” Keith hissed, before momentarily gazing at his metal wristbands. ‘I’ll show that twerp not to mess with me!’ he thought to himself.

Oh boy, Keith’s gonna be cheating in this match. Wonder if he’ll bring out his legendary Slot Machine.

“Alright then, it’s my turn!” Chevalier called out, a new surge of confidence coursing through his body. “I flip up my Rinyan, Lightsworn Rouge. Now I can shuffle a Lightsworn monster into my deck to draw a card.”

“Pfft, you wasted a card like Dimensional Prison just to protect your precious draw?” Keith taunted the petite blonde.

“Oh I’m not done yet.” Chevalier retorted, drawing his card. “Now I’ll tribute Rinyan to summon Celestia, Lightsworn Angel!”

Well I guess you can say Friendship is—Oh silly me, that’s the other Celestia. Carry on then.

An elegant angel clad in white armor descended onto the field, and pointed her staff at the US Champion. Keith looked on in horror as two of his facedown cards were obliterated, while Chevalier milled four cards from his deck, only for a muscular white wolf appeared on the field and let out an almighty howl, gripping it’s massive axe tightly. Keith was also forced to banish the top card of his deck due to Light Spiral’s effect.

“Aw look at that, Wulf wants to play with you. I’ll indulge it’s desire by having it attack your monster!” Chevalier giggled, with the wolf getting on all fours and mad a mad dash at Keith’s monster, obliterating it with it’s axe. However the monster soon revealed itself to be Ally of Justice Unknown Crusher, who sucked up Wulf into it’s trunk before disappearing from the battlefield.

“Heheheh, seems like your Wulf ended up like Old Yeller.” Keith grinned wickedly.

Dude, spoilers.

“Alright then, you asked for it. Celestia, attack Keith directly!” Chevalier snapped, as the angel charged up it’s staff before firing it at Keith, who retaliated by using his facedown card, Forbidden Lance.

ATK (2300-1500)

Bandit Keith: 2500


“Alright! That’s what I’m talking about!” Boudica cheered on.

“Hee-ho-ho, the former champ couldn’t take the hee-at!” Jack Frost taunted Keith, who hissed in response.

“I think I’ll end my turn with a card facedown.” Chevalier replied smugly. “It’s your move.”

“I’ll wipe that grin off your face!” Keith chuckled to himself, reaching towards his deck. As he drew, he quickly dug a card out of his wristband in an impressive sleight-of-hand trick. Boudica saw Keith acting odd, but brushed it off as a trick of the light.

Must be hard to masturbate while wearing that hooded cloak.

“I’ll use Monster Reborn to bring back Unknown Crusher. Then I’ll summon Nitro Synchron and use my monsters for a Synchro Summon!” Keith declared as his two monsters disappeared in a large beam of light, only for a larger, shiner version of Core Destroyer emerged from the light, its body covered in gold armor plating. “Say hello to Ally of Justice Catastor!”

“Oh boy…” Chevalier gulped.

Oh boy indeed, nice job stealing one of Yusei’s Synchron’s when you could’ve easily used one of the various Tuner monsters the Allies of Justice have.

“Oh boy indeed, now wipe that harlot out Catastor!” Keith ordered while drawing a card due to Nitro Synchron’s effect, as Catastor fired a large ball of dark energy at Celestia, disintegrating her instantly. “I’ll end my turn.”

“Alright then.” Chevalier called out, drawing his next card and started grinning to himself. “Some of my pals may have taken a look on the dark side of things, but that doesn’t mean they won’t fight for what’s right. Introducing Jain, Twilightsworn General!” he proudly announced his latest monster. The famous paladin stepped onto the battlefield in her trademark white armor, but wore a black and gold cloak over it.

In other words, they were sustained on a diet of edgy fanfics and Doritos.

“Not bad kid, you managed to stay safe from Catastor’s effect.” Keith commented. “Too bad it’s not strong enough to defeat it.”

“Oh really? Wait until you hear about Jain’s new effect; by banishing a Lightsworn monster from my graveyard, a faceup monster of my choice loses 300 ATK and DEF for every level the removed monster had, and I’ll select Celestia to do the honors.” Chevalier retorted.

“Say what?!” Keith cried out, as Celestia’s spirit helped charge up Jain’s sword with mystic energy, before she fired it at Catastor, causing the machine to tremble on the spot as it lost its precious energy

ATK (2200-700)

DEF (1200-0)


“Now Jain, seek revenge for your fallen comrade!” Chevalier declared, as Jain charged at Catastor and smote it in an instant.

“Nrrrrlllggh!” Keith grunted in pain.

Bandit Keith: 1400

“Hahaha, I end my turn by playing Gold Sarcophagus.” Chevalier giggled sweetly, selecting a card from his deck and banishing it. At this stage, Keith was sick of Chevalier’s games and decided to go for drastic measures.

‘Looks like I’ll have to use the ace up my sleeve, literally.’ Keith thought to himself, as he drew a card while pinching another card from his wristband.

‘Gotcha, you little sneak’ Boudica thought to herself, having caught Keith red-handed. However she decided to stay quiet since she had a gut feeling Keith was gonna lose anyway.

Of course he was gonna lose; he’s a stock antagonist in some Yugioh crossover nightmare that calls itself a story!

“I’ll use the spell, Cup of Ace. Depending on the result of my coin toss, either of us could draw more cards.” Keith called out, flipping a coin from his pocket. “Whaddya know, it came up Heads.” He grinned while drawing his cards. “And would you look at that, two more Cups of Ace!” he flipped his coin twice and it came up heads both times.

“Three heads in a row?” Chevalier commented, surprised at how lucky Keith was.

This is the guy that hides cards under his wristband, don’t be surprised when you find out that he’s using a trick coin.

“I was always a favourite of Lady Luck.” Keith commented, drawing his cards and eying up a rather peculiar card. ‘Wait, that’s one of the cards Krishna gave me. Better use it while I can.’

“I bet you’ve never seen this card before; Twin Hearts of Iron!” Keith grinned maniacally. “This baby enables me to summon 2 level four or lower Machine type monsters with different names from my deck. Come on out Allies of Justice, Nullfier and Quarantine!”

Oh boy, another made up card; this one enables a player to Special Summon two monsters directly from the deck.

“W-What?!” Chevalier gasped. “I’ve never heard of that card before!”

“Don’t get too worked up, you get to special summon a level four or lower monster from your graveyard.” Keith replied, as Chevalier decided to choose Garoth. “But here’s an old friend of mine, Nitro Synchron!”

Keith began chuckling louder than before as his field was filled up with monsters. “Now I’ll tribute all three of my cards to Synchro Summon my mightiest creature. Behold, Ally of Justice Decisive Armor!”

Chevalier began shivering in fear as a colossal gold-plated robot that had an enormous cannon on it’s back emerged from the light.

Now you know why Bandit Keith has so many fangirls.

“But wait, there’s more! I’ll use my Different Dimension Reincarnation to special summon my trusty Barrel Dragon!” Keith added, as another powerful monster appeared on his field. “And now I’ll activate its effect, so say sayonara to your general, dweeb!” Keith flipped his coin three times, as Barrel Dragon fired at Jain, destroying her instantly.

And he has a monster that doesn’t fit with the archetype he’s playing but serves as a pitiful reminder as to whose identity this pointless villain stole.

“Now Decisive Armor, obliterate that puny warrior!” Keith demanded, as the massive machine fired a colossal blast of energy at Garoth, sending him to another dimension. Luckily he was in Defense Position, protecting Chevalier from taking any damage. However he was wide open to Barrel Dragon, a fact that Keith capitalised on.

“Uwaaaaaahhhh!!” Chevalier cried out, as he was flung back a few feet.

Chevalier: 1400

“Oh no, this is ho-rrible!” Jack Frost cried out, as he and Boudica ran over to check up on Chevalier.

Eh, that money shot wasn’t too impressive.

“I-I’m fine…” he replied weakly, as he managed to get up off the ground and stared down Keith, who was smirking to himself.

“Try and get out of this, dweeb. I’ll end my turn.” Keith sneered.

“A-Alright then, I draw.” Chevalier replied, drawing his next card. All he had to do was survive until his next turn, but with a pair of powerful monsters on Keith’s field, and the single card he just drew, things weren’t going to be easy.

“I set this card facedown and end my turn…” Chevalier replied.

“Is that all you got left?” Keith inquired, starting his turn. “Guess I’ll put you out of your misery. I’ll have Decisive Armor activate it’s first effect, enabling me to destroy a Set card of my choice, and I’ll pick your facedown card.”

“Oh no…” Chevalier cried out, as his facedown card was destroyed.

Welp, you blew it. gg scrub.

“Time to end this; Barrel Dragon, Decisive Armor, send this kid to the next dimension!” Keith called out, eager to secure his next victory!” The two machines charged up their attacks and launched them at Chevalier, causing a large amount of sand to be kicked up into the air, blanketing the field.

“Get down!” Boudica called out as she and Jack Frost knelt while covering their faces. Eventually the sand fell back down and everyone could see again. Keith had a large grin on his face, confident that he won. However his jaw dropped in shock when he saw Chevalier still standing on the field, protected by a strange shield.

“Electromagnetic Turtle enables me to end the battle phase once per duel by banishing him.” Chevalier commented.

“Y-You may have survived this round, but I assure you that your soul shall be consumed by Shesha during my next turn.” Bandit Keith growled.

“Sorry to say that you won’t get a next turn.” Chevalier commented coolly, drawing his next card. “I activate another Charge of the Light Brigade, and I’m sure you know what it does.”

“Pfft, like some weakling would save your sorry hide!” Keith taunted.

“That’s the thing, the monster wasn’t why I activated the spell.” The petite blonde smirked. “Remember my Gold Sarcophagus?”

“Heh, like that’s—“Keith began, until it soon dawned onto him. “Y-You don’t mean-“

Yep, it’s asspull o’clock!

“That’s right. Since my Graveyard is full of my Lightsworn friends, I get to summon their leader; Judgment Dragon!” Chevalier smirked, as Keith looked on in horror. The majestic white dragon flew in the air for a while before landing gracefully onto the battlefield. “And at the small cost of a thousand lifepoints, I get to destroy every card expect itself.”

Chevalier: 400

“T-This can’t be real!” Keith started to panic, as his ace monsters were wiped out in an instant.

You could’ve avoided this situation, had you destroyed Garoth with Barrel Dragon, and attacked him directly with Decisive Armor. Some champion you turned out to be.

“This is what happens when you chose to rally beside Krishna; Judgment Dragon, punish Bandit Keith with your divine wrath!” Chevalier declared, as Judgment Dragon flew up into the air and fired a massive stream of holy fire at Keith.

“UWWWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!” Keith cried out in pain.

Bandit Keith: 0

Winner: Chevalier


Eh, asides from Keith’s hilarious misplay, there wasn’t anything majorly offensive with this duel. Or maybe there was and it slipped from my grasp somehow.

“Impossible! How could I lose?!” Bandit Keith exclaimed in disbelief, falling to his knees.

“Well you know what they say, cheaters never prosper.” Boudica replied smugly, walking over to the fallen duelist.

“Wait, he cheated?” Chevalier asked out loud, as Boudica snatched Keith’s arm and removed his wristband, causing a couple cards to fall onto the soft sand. “H-How could you Keith?” the petite blonde asked.

“Ever since Pegasus humiliated me all those years ago, my life went down the shitter. So I entered his Duelist Kingdom in order to get my revenge, but get this. Not only was the whole thing a scam, but Pegasus was a dirty fucking cheater. Between his one-of-a-kind cards, and his Millennium Eye, he cheated his way out of any duel. I figured that two can play that game, but the fop preached about how cheating is dishonourable, while staring at me with that fucking eye of his!” Keith recalled bitterly. “I’d do anything to reclaim my title, even if it means bending the rules.”

Ok, hold up here. First you say that it was thanks to Pokemon Reborn that you lost your title of U.S Champion, and now you say it was due to your loss against Pegasus? Is consistency non-existent in this fic?!

It was then that Keith’s duel disk began to glow harshly, surprising everyone but Chevalier. “W-W-What’s going on with this thing?!”

“It’s one of Krishna’s rules; whoever loses a duel must relinquish their soul to Shesha.” Chevalier answered sadly. “I’m sorry it had to end this way…”

“S-Seriously?!” Keith exclaimed, as a holographic arm emerged from the duel disk. “I-I’ll get you for this, Krishna!” he vowed revenge, as Shesha snatched his soul and promptly disappeared, with Keith’s body dissipating into thousands of bright lights.

Should’ve read the terms and conditions before signing up.

“Despite his cheating, I kinda feel bad for him.” Chevalier commented. “He’s got the skill of a great duelist, but lacks the honor of one.”

“Indeed. That said, you played a great game.” Boudica praised the young man. “Now why don’t we kick back and have a nice day at the beach?”

“Wahoo! What a great idea.” Jack Frost cheered, as he soon spotted a boat docking by the pier near their location. “Seems we’ve got company, ho.”

“Let’s check it out then.” Chevalier replied, as the trio made their way to the boat and saw Astolfo and a few members of the Fangame Committee hop off of it.

And now Boudica’s going to be introduced to the peanut gallery because the author thought it was a suitable use of bandwidth.

“Oh Chevvie! It’s so nice to see you here!” Astolfo chimed, running up to the blonde and began hugging him tightly.

“A-Ah! Not so tightly please.” Chevalier requested, as Astolfo eased up on the hug and soon noticed Boudica.

“Oh sweet, Boudy’s here as well!” the pinkette grinned.

“It’s nice to see you here as well.” Boudica greeted the young man. “I take it that these are your friends as well.” she added, gesturing at the Fangame Committee members.

“Well hello there darling, I’m Garret.” He introduced himself. “What’s your name good lookin’?”

Sorry Garret, you’re not a self-insert, so you don’t get any pussy. Try again next time.

“I’m Boudica, a fellow Servant of Fate like Astolfo and Chevalier.” She introduced herself as well.

“Like that British queen who gave the Romans a black eye?” Garret inquired, with Boudica nodding in response. “Nice.”

“A Servant of Fate?” Shiv inquired, intrigued by what he just heard.

“From what I heard, they’re holy warriors who take on the personification of famous historical figures. Under the command of their master Fujimaru Ritsuka, they fought a brutal war against the Cryptid Alliance and emerged victorious.” Adrienn explained. “I never expected our friends to be Servants of Fate.”

I don’t recall that happening, so it has to be some random idea the author could use for a fic sometime in the future.

“I should’ve mentioned that in the beginning…” Astolfo admitted, poking his tongue out playfully while tapping his head with his fist.

“Heheheh, no wonder I found you interesting…” Aurora commented to herself, before looking at Chevalier, something which the blonde noticed.

“W-Who are you?” Chevalier asked, a little uneasily.

“I’m Aurora, young one. I mean you no harm, so long as you don’t cross me that is.” she replied, a small smirk on her face.

Careful Chevalier, it’s what she usually says before she starts pegging you out of the blue.

“That’s good to hear.” Chevalier sighed in relief.

“So what were you three doing out here?” Melia inquired.

“The three of us were going to spend a day at the beach to lay back and prepare for the upcoming weeks. However we were soon ambushed by Bandit Keith, the former U.S Duel Monsters champion. Keith pledged his allegiance to the Divine Powers and wanted to duel Chevalier, which he accepted. It was a close match, with Keith pulling a few dirty tricks, but Chevalier won in the end.” Boudica recalled the series of events. “And that was when Keith had his soul stolen by Shesha.”

“It never ceases to sicken me how little regard Krishna has for his followers.” Adrienn replied with disgust.

You say that as if he gave a damn about humans to begin with.

“Hold up, you never said anything about people getting their souls stolen!” Aurora snapped at Shiv.

“Oh don’t pull that card on me; you’ve done way worse!” Shiv retorted.

“Keep it down you two, we can’t fight amongst each other right now!” Melia snapped at the duo. “Right now, we’ve got to focus on the main objective. You two can save it for another time.”

“Fine.” They replied.

“Anyway, I think that we should all go back to HQ and have a quick rest.” Adrienn suggested. “I’m sure everyone else would be thrilled to meet you, Aurora.”

Because playing card games and recruiting some bloodthirsty relative of Shiv’s is a most exhausting endeavour.

“Alright then.” Was all Aurora could say, as the group proceeded to make their way back to the Fangame Headquarters.

Tsukiji Kongangi: Recreation Room

“Tch, that ruffian was all bark and no bite.” Lekain scoffed upon hearing about Bandit Keith’s defeat. “I could’ve duelled circles around that weasel.”

“Pfft, sure you could.” Tayama retorted dryly, playing a game of Solitaire by himself.

“My deck was blessed by Lady Ashera herself; there’s no way I could lose!” Lekain proudly showed his deck off.

$50 his deck sucks monkey nuts.

“If I need a deck of my own, I could always get my boys to steal one for me.” Tayama commented, staying focused on his game. It was then that a third person entered the room. They were a rotund man of African-American descent and wore glasses over their eyes. His outfit consisted of a green button-up, long-sleeve shirt, a pair of jeans and a black bowler hat on his head.

“Hey, hey, hey! You must be the new guys; the name’s Smoke; Big Smoke.” He greeted the duo.

And now we have a G.T.A character, from San Andreas to be specific, showing up to declare his allegiance to the Divine Powers out of the blue. I’m morbidly curious as to who else Krishna would add to his little clique of loony-bin rejects.

“Ah I’ve heard of you and how you helped eliminate all those gangs in Los Santos. Splendid job you did my fine man.” Lekain praised the man, shaking his hand.

“Charmed.” Was all Tayama said, having finished his game.

“I remember when I was a two-bit gangster, shit was miserable. But then I read the good book, given to me by Lord Krishna. My life changed once I read that book, I learnt just how fucked this world is. That’s why I joined the Divine Powers; they’ll lead humanity to a new future where we can all prosper.” Big Smoke proclaimed to the duo.

“Well, this is fascinating and all but I’ve gotta head back to Roppongi Hills to see if my minions are doing their job.” Tayama called out as he proceeded to exit the room.

“Did I say something to upset him?” Big Smoke inquired with Lekain sighing to himself.

Nah, the author wanted a way to end this miserable chapter that barely resembles a cliffhanger.

What a great chapter that was; tune in next time where one of the best characters in the Shin Megami franchise makes their debut.

Fuck yeah, it’s finally Hallelujah’s time to shine!

Oh and in case you were curious about Tayama’s dream harem, here it is

Reborn:

Julia
Heather
Shelly
Anna
Luna
Serra
Aya
Adrienn
Amaria
Titania
Charlotte
Laura
Saphira
Ame
Alice

Rejuvenation:

Venam
Amber
Aelita
Erin
Saki
Melia
Nim
Crescent
Spacea
Tiempa
Valerie

Desolation:

Scarlett
Ava
Rosetta
Aurora

Other:

Nora (Insurgence)


How nice of the author to post his—I mean Tayama’s dream harem for no possible reason at all.

Made up Cards:

Twin Hearts of Iron

Type: Normal Spell

Effect: Special Summon 2 level 4 or lower Machine type monsters with different names from your Deck. Then your opponent gets to summon a level 4 or lower monster from their Graveyard.


And there’s the piece of shit that Keith used in order to summon Ally of Justice Over-Compensation.

Honestly, this chapter was more tolerable than Chapter 7, if only because it didn’t consist of several paragraph’s worth of pointless character descriptions. Still, I wonder what chapter 10 has in stock for us.

Read the Rulebook, Dumbass: 3


Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania (W.I.A)
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Lekain
Tayama
Big Smoke

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

Dashguy
Posts: 41
Joined: Sun Oct 29, 2017 12:33 pm
Location: Argentina

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by Dashguy » Tue Oct 09, 2018 11:59 am

“Y-You’re Bandit Keith!” Chevalier exclaimed, with the man laughing in response.

Oh ok, finally we get another Yugioh character in this fic, and it’s Bandit Keith to boot. Dashguy will be mighty pleased with this development.
I'm not going to lie, I feel bad seeing Keith being reduced to a mere punching bag. I mean, Pegasus has done far worse shit (including ruining Keith's Pro Duelist career), but thanks to his "boo hoo hoo I did it all because of love" excuse everybody gives him a pass.
“Yep; the Divine Powers told me that it was thanks to those shitty fangames that I lost my title as the U.S Duel Monsters Champion. That’s why I’m gonna take my anger out on you saps and help them destroy those games!” Bandit Keith declared. “On the flipside, you’ll be helping me reclaim my glory.”

How did—you know what, I’m not even going to bother. This buffoon seriously believe that Bandit Keith’s loss at Pegasus was due to Pokemon Reborn’s existence. Then again, I’m pretty sure that Reborn would be right up Pegasus’ alley.
I swear this shit is almost like a parody at this point. "Remember the accident that landed your uncle in the hospital for three weeks?"

"Yeah, a drunk driver ran him over..."

"Yes! And he was drunk because he was drinking while playing Pokémon Reborn! And remember when your dog Fido ran away from your house?"

"That was because my Dad accidentally left the door open and--"

"He was distracted by the announcement of Pokémon Reborn on his laptop! And when you fell down the stairs two years ago?"

"Okay, stop it, I was playing with a ball then and--"

"Yes, but the stairs where misaligned by 0.2 mm because the construction worker was distracted by thinking about Pokémon Reborn!"
“Destroying something a lot of people put their heart and soul into creating it, just so you can relive your glory days; what a selfish piece of work you are.” Boudica scoffed in disgust.
I love the way she says it, as if Keith was tasked with blowing up a school for rural children, a hospital or an animal refugee and not ambiguously attempt to destroy a fucking fan game.

Keep up the good work, man.

User avatar
GorillaGamer
Posts: 229
Joined: Sun Apr 16, 2017 8:44 pm
Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Fri Oct 12, 2018 11:01 pm

@Dashguy: Thanks for the vote of confidence. By the way, how would you say the duels in this fic are? Because if you thought the previous ones were bad, oh boy, you’ll be in for a treat this chapter.

As my warning gave away, there is indeed a duel in this chapter as well. However it is bad, so embarrassingly bad that it makes me reconsider just how bad the previous duels were. Either way, lets mock this chapter and bite the bullet.


Welcome back to the next instalment of my magnificent fic. This chapter is bound to be thrilling as the MS Waifu Army arrives in Japan and begins their twisted scheme. Meanwhile, another duel will take place in this chapter, and it will be magnificent as well.

With that said, I hope you enjoy this chapter!


This chapter will be anything but magnificent.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 9: The most magnificent duelist of them all

MS Waifu Army Base: Tokyo Bay Area

Several commanders of the MS Waifu Army had managed to set up a base of operations in the Tokyo Bay area, which was under the Divine Powers banner. A few of the commanders watched over the area, while the rest of them were busy decorating the base and attempting to recruit more waifus into the army.

Who were you lot again? Oh yeah, the Metal Slug chicks that the author hates because they weren’t a part of the original Metal Slug cast.

“Heheheh, things are going better than anticipated.” Elysion chuckled ominously, her tentacles wriggling in the air.

“Not only was Lord Krishna kind enough to give us a base to use, but we already have a steady stream of cash flowing in from lonely, desperate nerds.” Izabella added. “I like the basement by the way; makes a suitable torture dungeon if I say so.”

Suit yourself, Ms. EdgeQueen.

“It’s not just the loners who shell out for us; there’s also the poor saps who shell out for us just so they can win matches.” Aisha grinned. “Dominating the meta rules!”

“Indeed, which is why we must crush these MS Loyalists once and for all.” HMT declared. “And that snake’s the key to doing so.”

“Snake?” Aisha inquired.

“Shesha, that massive beast that follows closely behind Krishna. It feasts on peoples souls so that it may carry them over to the new universe.” HMT answered.

“However it’s too scared to eat the souls of Ame and her friends; I have no idea why that’s the case.”

“Ah yes, Krishna does go on about how it’s the only way for humanity to attain salvation.” Elysion added. “Personally I’m fine with staying in this universe so long as I get to keep my cash.”

It was then that a soldier of the Waifu Army ran up to the ladies with an important message. “Lady Elysion, Zenith of the Divine Powers wishes to speak to you!”

“Bring him in.” Elysion ordered, as the soldier nodded and ran back to where he came from. A few seconds later, the Infernal Cult Leader made his way to the ladies.

“Welcome to Tokyo, ladies. I hope you’re enjoying your time here.” Zenith greeted them.

“While you’re here, may I suggest you visit Akihabara? It’s got plenty of merchandise that’ll fit your unsubtle agenda.”

“We haven’t been here that long, but so far I’m preferring Tokyo over the United States.” Izabella admitted.

“Oh really?” Zenith replied. “Why is that?”

“A lot of the Loyalists reside in the US. They managed to enlist powerful journalists who called us out on our predatory tactics, and accused us of sexism. A moronic statement, given how much female representation we’re giving them.” Elysion scoffed.

“I doubt glorified eye-candy is what they’re looking for…” Zenith commented.

“Eye-candy; pfft that’s what they refer to us as.” Izabella scoffed. “They can never be satisfied with what they get given, always finding new things to complain about. The only characters they want are self-insert mouth pieces used to vomit up whatever opinions those fools agree with.”

Is the author on the side of those moronic “GAMERS ARE SEXIST!!1!” journalists, or am I reading too deeply into this experiment in glue huffing?

“So do these Loyalists agree with the journalists?” Zenith inquired.

“No fucking shit!” HMT replied harshly. “They cower to these journalists and dance on their strings by adding in characters to suit their agenda, when in reality they should be adding more characters in bikinis to rake in those weeaboo bucks!”

“Ok, and what do you plan to do with all the “weeaboo bucks” you’re bringing in?” Zenith inquired.

Fuck that, I wanna know the exchange rate for those weeaboo bucks. At the very least, they can’t be more worthless than bitcoin.

“Easy, we’ll buy a beachside mansion where we can relax for the rest of our lives.” Aisha answered. “Nothing wrong with business-minded people making a living to secure an easy life, right?”

“Well yeah, there is nothing wrong with that.” Zenith admitted. “But wouldn’t you make more money if you listen to the loyalists suggestions?”

“Pffft, like we would listen to those chumps.” Izabella dryly retorted, as an idea sparked in Elysion’s mind.

“I got it! We sprinkle in a few war machines to convert Loyalist soldiers to our side.” Elysion called out.

“I like that idea.” Aisha grinned. “Especially since it helped the Blaze Brigade girls garner respect amongst the Loyalists.”

Having done a bit of research beforehand and looking at these Blaze Brigade girls, they appear more modestly dressed than your average MSA waifu the fans complain about. Either that or they’re really into chicks who can set them on fire.

“Unfortunately, there’s a chance that the woman we hire to man the machine would defect to them.” Izabella pointed out. “Need I remind you of the Iron Fortress?”

“She was an easily manipulable A.I, just like the other three.” Elysion replied. “We can always hack them so we can regain control of them.”

“Right then, I’ll leave you to your planning.” Zenith said, making his way to the exit. “By the way, we’re hosting our own rally at Kinshicho. Why don’t you come along and enjoy the festivities?”

“Well I do have some spare time, so I don’t see why not.” Elysion answered.

“Wonderful!” Zenith grinned. “I’ll be sure to let every else know about this.” The cult leader called out, closing the door behind him, as the MS Waifu Army leaders began plotting their next move.

And what exactly did that fulfil? All it showed was the waifus chuckling among themselves while getting invited to another fucking speech by associates of the Divine Speakers, which is what they may as well call themselves at this point.

Ueno Park: Tokyo

Astolfo and his friends had made a mad dash for the park, upon hearing the news about a rather powerful agent of the Divine Powers causing mayhem in the area. They arrived at the center and soon spotted the perpetrator duelling against someone.

“N-No way, is that Flamvell Dilly?!” Astolfo exclaimed, looking on in shock as. Flamvell Dilly wore a red jacket, a black undershirt and jeans, as well as black boots and a pair of shades over his eyes. He had red hair that was done up into a Mohawk, and had a black goatee on his face.

Right…

Hey Astolfo, mind telling this Hunter Pace knockoff that he looks fucking stupid? Thank you


“Flamvell Dilly?” Boudica inquired.

“He’s the Japanese Duel Monsters Champion, securing wins over the most powerful of decks using his Flamvell cards.” Blair explained. “I’ve been hoping to challenge him for his title, but not like this…”

“I’m sure you can take him out with ease; after all Chevalier showed me just how good he is.” Boudica encouraged her friends, however they shook their heads in response.

“Flamvell Dilly can duel circles around us, hence why he’s the champion.” Chevalier admitted. “In fact I believe he could’ve taken out Bandit Keith with relative ease.”

“I’d put a stop to him, but I’m only a beginner.” Micaiah admitted as well.

“Same here; I still need to fine tune my combos.” Sothe added.

Translation: “Let’s stand here like the useless motherfuckers that we are, so that the object of the authors ego stroking looks good.”

To everyone’s shock and horror, Flamvell Dilly effortlessly crushed his opponent, their soul getting siphoned by Shesha.

“Hahaha! No one can defeat me!” Flamvell Dilly laughed maniacally. “Is there anyone brave or foolish enough to challenge me?!”

“Allow me to take you up on your offer.” A haughty voice called out from the crowd, as the citizens stepped aside and saw a group of warriors clad in white uniforms, three male and two female, make their way towards the rouge champion. The leader of the group was a young male who had short brown hair and matching brown eyes. In his right hand was an ornate spear that was blessed by the Four Archangels.

“Who do you punks think you are?!” Flamvell Dilly snarled at them.

“I am Gaston the Magnificent, leader of the Crusaders and Duel Monsters Champion of Mikado!” he proclaimed, puffing his chest with pride.

Oh…so Gaston was the guy the author was hyping up in the last chapter. How disappointing.

Oh and notice how pitiful his description is? It’s like the author doesn’t care to describe anyone in detail, outside of his fangame-waifu spank material.


“You, a champion? Don’t make me laugh!” Flamvell Dilly cackled maniacally, his lungs cramping up from the pain.

“Clearly the calibre of duellists in Tokyo must be pitifully low if this is how their champion acts.” Gaston scoffed, causing the Crusaders to laugh amongst themselves.

“How dare you question my skill!” Flamvell Dilly snarled, bringing out his own duel disk. “Duel me, bitch!”

“Very well. After all, I was tasked by Lord Merkabah to eliminate the Divine Powers.” Gaston coolly replied, bringing out his own duel disk, which was just as ornate as his spear.

I was joking when I said that line back in Chapter 4, you bastard! Now there’s a good chance that the angels and demons would battle each other with card games.

“Oh my, two regional champions duelling each other. This will be most entertaining.” Micaiah commented.

“Damn, I should’ve brought some refreshments with me.” Sothe cursed under his breath. “Oh well, at least I get to watch an excellent duel.”

“Let’s duel!” both duellists declared, drawing their starting hands.

Gaston: 4000

Flamvell Dilly: 4000


“Since this is my home turf, I get to go first!” Flamvell Dilly barked loudly. “I’ll summon Flamvell Poun in Attack Mode and end with three cards facedown!”

A couple facedown cards and a monster with very low stats. Clearly this guy is a champion-tier duelist.

A small monkey that had it’s mane and forearms on fire scurried onto the field and sat on the ground, eyeing up its opponent. Gaston was not impressed at all.

“Is that the best you got?” he mocked his opponent, causing Dilly to gnash his teeth in anger. “Allow me to show you how a true champion duels, I draw!”

“Not so fast, I activate both of my Needlebug Nests!” Dilly hissed, milling a whole bunch of cards from his deck.

“Let me guess, you’re hoping to draw Rekindling so you can stage a comeback using the monsters you just milled?” Gaston replied, causing everyone to gasp audibly.

“H-How did you figure out my elite strategy?!” Dilly shrieked in fear.

“It’s the only strategy that Flamvells can pull of adequately.” Gaston retorted. “Besides, several decks can use Rekindling more effectively than Flamvells can ever hope to achieve.”

Ok, was this duel made to bash on the Flamvell archetype? ‘Cause while I admit that they’re not the greatest cards in the game, they’re still more usable than some of the really unplayable garbage.

“Wow, he immediately predicted Dilly’s strategy.” Chevalier gushed in awe.

“Can’t wait to see what deck he uses.” Blair chimed in as well.

“Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I’ll activate the Continuous Spell, Vylon Element!” Gaston proudly declared, as a mysterious portal made up of golden rings hovered on his side of the field. “Next I’ll summon Vylon Hept in Attack Mode and end my turn with a card facedown!”

The crowd began muttering among themselves over the first play Gaston made. It was obvious that they were all impressed by what they saw, with Gaston basking in all the praise targeted at him.

It was no better than Dilly’s first turn. Why does this jackoff get praise for his basic move, while Dilly gets shamed for his similarly basic move?!

“Woah, look at the pretty robot.” Astolfo cooed. “I want one for myself.”

“I can’t wait to challenge him to a duel!” Roland added, his body pumped up with adrenaline.

“Kyheheheheh! What’s the matter, too scared to attack my monster?” Dilly taunted the young samurai.

“Hardly. I’m not foolish enough to blunder into whatever half-baked trap you set up for me.” Gaston retorted, angering Dilly.

“I’ll teach you to mess with me, my draw!” Dilly hissed, drawing his next card before laughing maniacally. “Nyeheheheheheheh! It’s game over punk, I’ll activate my Rekindling, enabling me to swarm my field with Flamvell monsters!”

Ah, Rekindling. One of the more controversial cards in the meta during my time playing the game.

The crowd looked on in interest as four monsters materialised on Dilly’s field; Flamvell Firedog, Flamvell Grunika, Neo Flamvell Origin and Neo Flamvell Sabre.

“Kekeke, now the fun begins. I’ll tribute my Firedog and Grunika to forge a circuit and discover the truth.” Dilly announced, as his monsters disappeared into a Link Circuit. “Arise, Duelittle Chimera!”

The small Chimera emerged from the circuit and curled up into a ball to take a nap.

Duelittle Chimera: ATK (1400-1900)

Flamvell Poun: ATK (200-700) DEF (200-700)

Neo Flamvell Origin: ATK (500-1000) DEF (200-700)

Neo Flamvell Sabre: ATK (2100-2600) DEF (200-700)


“Oh but I’m far from over. Next I’ll tribute Origin and Sabre to Synchro Summon another powerful monster!” Dilly exclaimed giddily, as the two monsters fused together to create a powerful warrior wearing black and red armor. “Behold, Flamvell Uruquizas!”

ATK (2100-2600)

DEF (400-900)


“To top thing off, I’ll tribute my Poun to summon Flamvell Commando!” Dilly added, as his monkey disappeared in a bright ray of light and a muscular warrior wielding a large bazooka made out of rock that spits out large fireballs emerged from the light.

ATK (2200-2700)

DEF (200-700)


Yep, Rekindling is that powerful, to the point where there’s constant debate over whether it should be Forbidden, or lowered to Semi-Limited.

“The game’s over for you hoity-toity Mikado scum! Now my monsters, crush him!!” Dilly ordered, as his powerful monsters all charged towards Gaston, only for a weird vortex to appear out of nowhere and send the monsters flying back.

“How pitiful, I’d thought a champion such as yourself would have an answer to Negate Attack.” Gaston dryly commented.

“Ngggh, I end my turn.” Dilly hissed. “But the next turn will be your last!”

“Is that so? Well allow me to double check for you.” Gaston smirked, drawing his next card. “I gotta say, you were right with your prediction.”

“BWHAHAHAHAHAHAH!” Dilly laughed maniacally. “Why don’t you surrender already if you’ve lost?!”

“You don’t understand. It’s my last turn because I’ll defeat you before it ends.” Gaston replied, his smirk growing even larger.

Huh, that was quicker than I expected. Gaston probably got sick of this author’s blowjob and is telling him to stop.

“W-What do you mean?!” Dilly demanded.

“Allow me to show you the key to my endgame, the Equip Spell, Rod of Silence-Kay’est!” Gaston proudly declared, equipping it to Hept.

DEF (800-1300)

“Oh no, a pitiful defense boost. I am dying of fright!” Dilly mocked, pretending to act limp.

I was wondering what kind of deck he was playing, but the Equip Spell confirmed my suspicions. Gaston’s playing a variant of the Vylon archetype known as Omega Turbo, where you use the effects of Vylon Element and Rod of Silence to combo with the Vylon Equip Spells to summon Vylon Omega as quickly as possible. Originally it was a niche but fun strategy, but with the rise of Link Monsters, it proved to be a potent Link engine.

“Heh, I expected an Unclean One such as yourself to have no idea what I’m about to do. However I’m merciful enough to show it to you, starting off by equipping Vylon Filament to Hept.” Gaston retorted, equipping his second spell to Hept, only for Filament to get destroyed due to Kay’est’s effect.

“W-Why would he do such a thing?” Boudica inquired the group, confused at Gaston’s apparent misplay. However everyone’s attention was soon directed to the portal on Gaston’s field, as a Vylon emerged from it, catching everyone off-guard.

“H-How were you able to summon a monster like that?!” Dilly screeched.

“That’s the effect of my Vylon Element.” Gaston coolly retorted. “What’s more, I can add a Vylon Equip card from my deck, every time one gets sent to the graveyard, and I think you should know where I’m going with this.”

Dilly trembled in fear as Gaston repeated his combo several times with three more Vylons emerging from the portal.

“Allow me to show you a proper Link Summon; I forge the circuit with my Tesseracts and Pentachloros to preach the truth that the Lord Almighty teaches us in Mikado.” Gaston declared, as the four machines entered the circuit and caused a massive beam of light to appear from the circuit, with the crowd covering their eyes. Once the light died down, a colossal black dragon had appeared where the circuit was and roared loudly at Dilly. “Say hello to Darkness Metal, the Dark Steel Dragon!”

Yep, kinda like that. Though I wonder what the hell is Darkness Metal doing inside a Vylon deck.

“T-T-T-That beast doesn’t scare me.” Dilly tried to put on a brave face.

“Oh really? Then my next move will!” Gaston replied, repeating his combo several times to summon three more Vylons. “Now I’ll tribute my Sphere, Charger and Vanguard to Synchro Summon the almighty Vylon Alpha!”

A holy war machine with a round body, large wings and the Greek Letter alpha on it’s back descended from the heavens and stared down Flamvell Dilly.

“Want me to do it again? Because I’m more than happy to do so.” Gaston sneered arrogantly at Dilly, repeating the combo another two times with a pair of Vylons emerging from the portal. “Excellent, now I’ll tribute my Soldier and Prism to Synchro Summon another messenger of the lord, Vylon Epsilon!”

Unfortunately, as different as it is, Omega Turbo can be boring to play against since you’re essentially watching your opponent thin their deck for a few minutes between their searching and summoning.

A second war machine descended from the heavens and joined it’s comrade, this one taking on the form of the Greek letter epsilon, and sporting large wings as well. It to, stared down the terrified Tokyo Champion

“And now it’s time for my ace monster to appear.” Gaston continued, as he repeated his deadly combo two more times, with a pair of Vylons emerging from the portal. “Time for the grand finale; by tributing my Cube, Stella and Hept, I can call upon the ultimate Vylon from my extra deck!”

The three monsters entered the portal as a bright light appeared in the sky, causing the crowd to look up in awe. Dilly was scared out of his mind as a glorious, golden war machine with black wings descended from the heavens, it’s body housing a metallic frame shaped like the Greek letter omega.

“Behold, Vylon Omega. The messenger of your impending doom.” Gaston announced.

Fun Fact: Vylon Omega is the only Synchro Monster outside of the Red Dragon Archfiend archetype that needs two tuners to be summoned.

“S-S-S-Stay back man!” Dilly began panicking.

“Let me show you all my magnificence! Alpha, dispose of that Chimera!” Gaston ordered, as the machine whipped up a powerful gust with it’s wings, sending the critter flying away as Dilly struggled to stand his ground.

Flamvell Dilly: 3700

Flamvell Uruquizas: ATK (2600-2100) DEF (900-400)

Flamvell Commando: ATK (2700-2200) DEF (700-200)


“Now Darkness Metal, tear that commando to shreds!” Gaston ordered, as the large dragon snatched the Commando in its mighty grip and tore the top half off with it’s powerful jaws.

Flamvell Dilly: 3100

“Epsilon, destroy Flamvell Uruquizas!” Gaston ordered, as the war machine charged up a ball of holy light and fired it at the warrior, disintegrating him instantly. Flamvell Dilly screamed in pain as the rays of light burnt his skin.

Flamvell Dilly: 2400

The Tokyo Champion looked on in horror, as Omega began hovering towards him, while Gaston was grinning wildly.

“N-No. NOOO!!” Dilly screamed in fear. “P-P-Please have mercy, sir!”

“Those who side with the Divine Powers don’t deserve the Lord’s mercy.” Gaston scoffed in disgust at Dilly’s cowardice. “Omega, condemn this fool with your heavenly light.”

The large war machine began praying to itself for at least half a minute, before a massive beam of holy light rained down onto Dilly, causing the man to let out a bone-chilling scream as he was assaulted by the light.

Flamvell Dilly: 0

Winner: Gaston


I kid you not when I say that was the most boring, pathetic duel of them all. Flamvell Dilly’s plays were the standard for the archetype he’s playing, but he spent the duel talking like some coked-out rockstar. And that’s not mentioning the illegal plays that Gaston made.

What do I mean by this? Well Vylon Element only special summons Vylon tuners from the deck, not the non-tuner Vylons. Meaning that Gaston shouldn’t have been able to summon all those Synchro Monsters that he did. If it was one time only, then I wouldn’t be making such a fuss, but he did it FOUR times! Four fucking times he made a blatantly illegal play, which was made worse when Dilly didn’t even call him out on it.

Read the Rulebook, Dumbass: 7

Arguably the worst part was that there was no tension whatsoever. Gaston had complete control of the duel the entire time, only replying to Dilly’s comments with smug indifference. Tension is what makes a duel exciting; there’s got to be genuine reason for the protagonist to be in danger of losing, something which the other duels got right. Mind you, it was fucking stupid that D/D/D’s were struggling against fucking Jurrac’s of all things, but at least there was some tension.

But what baffles me the most was that all this praise was getting dumped onto Gaston. He isn’t the author’s self-insert, he isn’t some fangame female that the author jerks off to; he’s just a character from a game that the author really likes. Some “Magnificent” duel this turned out to be.


“Y-You got lucky punk! Why I oughta—“ Dilly began, before his duel disk started glowing. The holographic arm of Shesha snatched the champion’s soul before he could even so much as scream in terror.

“So this is the fate of those who follow Krishna? Pathetic…” Gaston scoffed, as the whole crowed applauded him over his amazing duel. The young man took the opportunity to bask in all the praise.

“I gotta hand it to him, knocking out the opponent in one turn’s a pretty impressive feat.” Boudica commented.

Meh, there are decks that can knock out the opponent in the very first turn. That wasn’t anything special.

“Indeed, especially with an underrated archetype like Vylons.” Blair added. “Oh man, I’m more pumped than ever to challenge him.”

“I’m in for one hell of a ride if I have to challenge him sometime in the future.” Sothe said to himself. “Better prepare for such an occasion.”

A few of the Crusaders who tagged along Gaston soon noticed Astolfo and his group, and began muttering among themselves. “Hey, isn’t he that famous Rider of Black from those fairy-tales we were taught as children?”

What, is the Fate/Stay Night franchise the shit in Mikado?

“Looks like it. Wonder what he’s doing here.”

“Perhaps he’s fighting the Divine Powers as well.”

It was then that Gaston noticed the Crusaders chatting amongst themselves and walked towards them. “And what exactly, are you lot talking about?”

“S-Sir Gaston, we had spotted someone bearing a resemblance to the legendary hero Astolfo.” One of the Crusaders replied.

“Oh really?” Gaston inquired. “Then take me to this Astolfo, right now.”

“After all, I need to know the answer to this most baffling question. Are traps gay?”

The Crusaders did as they were asked to and escorted their leader to Astolfo, who was speechless upon seeing the Mikado Champion walk up to him.

“So you’re the famous Astolfo I’ve heard so much about.” Gaston commented, as the pinkette was struggling to form a coherent sentence. “Stunned awe, while appreciated, is hardly a civilised greeting, wouldn’t you say?”

“A-A-Ah, sorry ‘bout that. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Gaston!” Astolfo quickly blurted.

“That’s SIR Gaston. I didn’t work my hands to the bone in order to restore my family’s legacy, following what that buffoon of a brother did, to be called anything other than sir!” Gaston reminded the young man.

“M-My apologies.” Astolfo replied. “You’re really talented, Sir Gaston.”

“Obviously; one would have to be in order to be blessed by the lord himself.” Gaston brushed the comment off.

To give the author his dues, he managed to capture the sheer arrogance that Gaston showed off in SMT IV: A

“So just how strong are you, compared to other duelists in the world?” Chevalier inquired.

“Let me put it to you in a way you can understand it; the Samurai are the most elite duelists in the world. The Crusaders, are the most elite out of the elite. As captain of the Crusaders, I am the elite, of the elite, of the elite.” Gaston proclaimed, as the crowd oohed and aahed in response.

“S-Sir Gaston, I challenge you to a duel!” Blair declared, bringing out her duel disk. The Crusaders began laughing like crazy, as Gaston eyed her up as if she grew a second head.

“I’m sorry, who are you?” Gaston inquired in a condescending tone of voice.

“Oh my bad, I’m Blair. I wanna become the Duel Monsters champion of Tokyo one day.” She introduced herself.

“So you’re part of the common rabble then? Do yourself a favour and win your championship before you even consider challenging me. I don’t duel weaklings.” Gaston scoffed.

Why, because she’ll call you out on your cheating?

“H-Hey! I’m not some average duelist you find wandering the streets!” Blair retorted.

“I’ll grant you the notion that you have some skill, given that Astolfo allows you to follow him. But it pales when compared to MY skill.” Gaston reminded her.

“Sir Gaston, is it true that you’re fighting the Divine Powers?” Micaiah inquired. “Because if so, then we’re more than welcome for you to fight alongside us.”

“My liege, that’s Micaiah! The legendary Maiden of Dawn!” one of the Crusaders exclaimed. “Her assistance would be extremely beneficial to us.”

Just how many legends about video game characters do they tell in Mikado?! What’s next, do they pray to Pokémon Reborn every day?

“Is she?” Gaston replied, a semi-interested look on his face. “Ah yes, I’ve heard about you. Lord Merkabah was most impressed with how you deal with all the Unclean Ones polluting your nation.”

“T-thank you, I guess…” Micaiah said a little uneasily. “Anyway, will you fight alongside us?”

“No.” Gaston answered coldly, surprised the group.

“Why not?!” Micaiah demanded an answer.

“We may both be fighting against the Divine Powers, but our goals are vastly different. I fight to eliminate those who would rebel against the Lord, while you fight to protect your fangames.” Gaston explained. “Besides, I’m not one to take orders from that committee you follow blindly.”

“What do you have against the fangames?!” Sothe snapped. “They’ve already been through a lot, they don’t need any more suffering!”

Ah yes, they truly suffered at the hands of the Divine Speakers and their idiot lackeys.

“You mistake me; neither I nor the Lord have anything against these fangames. We’re simply prioritising the more important issue at hand.” Gaston replied, which seemed to calm Sothe down.

“That’s good to hear.” Sothe replied. “So how can we help you?”

“You can help by staying out of our way.” Gaston informed them. “You can deal with the small fries that attack your fangames, while we deal with the important missions.”

“Sounds easy enough.” Roland commented.

“Good. Glad I didn’t have to repeat myself. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some important matters to deal with.” Gaston said, as he and the Crusaders proceeded to exit the park, with the crowd dispersing as well.

“Talk about a bloated ego.” Boudica commented. “Though if he’s as strong as he claims to be, then I can’t blame him.”

Meh, give it a dozen or so chapters, he’ll get his ass kicked in his scripted loss.

“It doesn’t matter how big his ego is, I can’t wait to burst his bubble!” Blair declared, her voice filled with determination, as Astolfo’s phone began ringing. He picked it up and answered the call.

“Hey it’s Adrienn here. Can you and your friends come over to the Kinshicho Shopping District as soon as possible? It’s an important matter.” Xyr requested.

“Sure thing pal!” Astolfo chimed. “We’ll be there in a jiffy.”

“Thanks mate, I’ll see you there. Bye!” Adrienn replied, before hanging up the phone.

“Alright everyone, it seems we’ve got our next mission.” Astolfo informed them. “Our destination’s the Kinshicho Shopping District.” He called out, as they all proceeded to walk towards Chevalier’s SUV and begin the drive to Kinshicho.

That was another good chapter; I hope you enjoyed that duel. The next chapter will be a little different as it will feature a Pokémon battle to spice things up a bit.

And with the treat of a Pokémon battle looming over the horizon, I think it’s about time to wrap up this chapter. All it was, was a glorified tug job of the author’s idol, as he duelled another stock antagonist. I’ll catch you all in the next chapter, peeps!

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania (W.I.A)
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Flamvell Dilly (Defeated)
Lekain
Tayama
Big Smoke

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Izabella
Aisha
HMT
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sun Oct 21, 2018 9:33 pm

With that pathetic duel over and done with, it’s now time to see just how well this author can write a Pokémon battle. Suffice to say, it's just as bad as the duels.

Are you ready for the heroes to initiate the first battle in the war against the Divine Powers, and humiliate the traitors as well? Well this chapter will be up your alley! I hope you enjoy this chapter.

I’m also happy that the Choose Your Legends: Round 2 heroes have finally been released in Fire Emblem Heroes. I went ahead and picked Veronica since she looks strong, but that can be said for all of them.


Joy, another piece of unnecessary commentary from this gacha-obsessed fool. If you love the game so much, why don’t you write a story about it then?!



On second thought, I take that back.


Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 10: Reclaiming the Initiative

Tsukiji Kongangi: Damien’s Quarters

The young man had quickly adapted to his new life as Godslayer of the Divine Powers. The deities were surprisingly receptive of the young man, despite his association with the fangame. However a few of the traitors, notably Fern, Rick and Madelis were suspicious of him, believing him to be a mole. Just as he was about to tuck in for the night, an unexpected yet familiar presence visited him. The figure was a skeleton that wore a pink Renaissance-era outfit, and cradled a violin in his arms.

“David…what are you doing here?” Damien inquired.

Oh, well this came right the fuck out of nowhere. For the uninitiated, David is part of a set of demons from Shin Megami Tensai known as the Fiends, a race of demons that represent various incarnations of death. Why Damian is chummy with one of them is beyond my understanding.

“Oh the usual; playing my violin so the dead can dance the dance of death. Typical Fiend stuff." David replied, slowly playing his violin. “Tis been some time since I last saw you; what’d ya get up to?”

“I left my friends in the fangame community…” Damien answered sadly, a little hung up over it.

“Left them, why?!” David asked, baffled by what Damien did.

“They, they lied to me about my mother’s fate. They said she was in prison, when in reality she was executed.” The young man answered. “I saw no reason to associate myself with those liars anymore.”

“Understandable, but a shame. Especially since things were working out between you and that Nora lass.” David commented, as Damien started blushing faintly.

What’s this, the author’s letting Damian have a relationship with one of his waifus? Well that’s a surprise.

“Uhh yeah, ehehehehe…” he chuckled sheepishly, before sighing to himself. “If only she came with me, I wouldn’t feel so bad about leaving them.”

“I’m sure she’ll come around once she learns the truth about the Divine Powers.” David attempted to comfort the young man. “Speaking of which, how has your time here been so far?”

“It was a little difficult for me to settle in at the beginning, but everybody helped me out whenever I needed it.” Damien answered, perking up a bit. “Though I can’t say the same about the other traitors.”

“Others?” David pressed further.

“Several former associates of mine had defected to the Divine Powers before I did. However they view me with suspicion, given that an acquaintance of mine had snuck into the group as a mole for Ame.” Damien answered. “But enough about me, how are the other Fiends going?”

That depends on whether he was able to find them. Seriously, am I the only one who thinks that Fiend hunting in SMT: IV was an exercise in agony?

“Ah they’re doing their job; of course Trumpeter won the monthly contest again. I swear it’s like he’s got an innate talent for it. No wonder he’s the Mother’s favorite.” David chuckled lightly.

“Heheheh, at least there’s next month.” Damien chuckled as well. “Anyway, have any of you shown interest in joining the Divine Powers?”

For the love of YHVH, say no, David! The last thing this fic needs is more random villains.

“Don’t know about the others, but even if I did want to join, I’d need to ask the Mother beforehand.” David admitted. “What’ll we do if we did design to join?”

“If I were to take a guess, I’d say that you’d have to kill those who oppose the Divine Powers, so that their souls can be fed to Shesha.” Damien suspected.

“Shesha…that’s the giant snake that Krishna keeps as a pet right?” David inquired.

“Yeah, it still gives me the chills to this day.” Damien admitted. “Anyway, I have a busy day tomorrow, and I need to sleep. See you later!”

“See ya later, mate!” David farewelled the young man, warping out of the room as Damien quickly fell asleep. A few minutes after the young man fell asleep, Krishna warped into the room and studied him, having heard his conversation with David.

“To think that my Godslayer is the legendary warrior who has befriended the incarnations of death…” Krishna began, chuckling lightly to himself before warping out of the room.

Evidently one of the perks of being a deity is watching your followers as they sleep.

Kinshicho Shopping District

Astolfo and his group had arrived at the designated meeting spot, where they were quickly hailed by Garret. They hopped out of the car and followed him into a small building, where Adrienn was waiting.

“Ah, it’s you. Glad you were able to help us out.” Adrienn smiled serenely at the newcomers.

“Hehehe, I‘ve got no problem helping out cuties like yourself.” Astolfo smiled back, with Adrienn chuckling lightly as a faint blush appeared on xyr’s face. Just then another person entered the building, catching everyone off-guard

“Titania?! We didn’t expect you to be out of hospital already!” Garret exclaimed in shock.

Rider of Black had realized that he can’t fuck his waifu if she’s in the hospital. That’s why she was able to quickly recover from coughing up blood.

“The doc discharged me, stating that I recovered a lot quicker than he expected. Good thing to since now he can focus his attention on Ame and Alice.” Titania replied.

“How are they?” Micaiah inquired.

“Their condition hasn’t worsened overnight, but it hasn’t improved either.” Titania frowned, before she soon noticed Boudica. “Don’t think I’ve met you before.”

“I’m Boudica, one of Britannia’s greatest warriors!” she introduced herself proudly, posing with her sword and shield.

“A strong lady with red hair that wields a sword and shield? I think we’re gonna get along just fine.” Titania replied, a small smile on her face, which shocked everyone else in the room.

Methinks the developers of Reborn got their inspiration for Titania from Boudica; and I’m not talking about the ones in this fic.

“Woah! Did Titania smile for once?” Garret exclaimed.

“Yeah. I’m not pissed-off all the time.” Titania retorted, as Melia entered the building and joined the group.

“Ah, it’s so good to see you again Melia.” Roland greeted her.

“Indeed, but we’ve got more pressing matters on hand. Turns out that the traitors have received some back up from the MS Waifu Army.” Melia reported.

“The what now?” Blair asked. “MS Waifu Army; do they deal out ice-cream or something?”

“Not quite. They’re a rouge faction from Metal Slug Attack who wished to flood the game with poorly-written, objectified waifus for the sole purpose of drawing in money from addicted gamers.” Melia informed the young girl. “Krishna must’ve recruited them to his cause.”

Because the best way to protest objectified women in games is to hire characters who deal solely in objectified women. As far as plans go, Krishna’s half-assing it.

“Oh, Flute Boy. Once I get my hands on him, I’ll make him regret all his life choices.” Titania vowed, as Melia was relieved to see she had recovered.

“It’s so good to see you up and about so soon.” Melia smiled.

“Well you know what they say; I’m as tough as steel.” Titania quipped back. It was then that two more people, Shiv and Aurora entered the building, with Titania tensing up at the latter’s presence.

“Ah, good to see that we’re all—“Garret began, but was cut off before he could continue.

“What the hell are you doing here Aurora?!” Titania demanded.

“Oh my, didn’t they tell you I’m pitching in as well?” Aurora replied in a mocking tone of voice.

Ladies, if you’re gonna have a catfight, then make it entertaining. It’s been ages since I saw anything exciting.

“My bad, I should’ve informed her about it.” Adrienn admitted.

“No need to worry your pretty little head over it. Besides, nothing wrong with a good surprise.” Aurora chuckled.

“Except when said surprise is an axe-crazy lady with a short fuse…” Titania muttered.

Says the woman who butchered a bunch of Meteor grunts…

“Before we tear at each other’s throats, I still need to finish my report.” Melia interjected, before clearing her throat. “In addition to the MS Waifu Army, I also saw a bunch of thugs from the Ashura-kai, and some soldiers from the Begnion Empire.”

“The Begnion Empire?!” Micaiah cried out in shock. “Just what on earth is that creep planning?”

“Hmmm, you have a history with them?” Shiv inquired.

“The Begnion Empire occupied my home nation of Daein, following the conclusion of the Mad King’s War. Needless to say, they subjugated the populace and either enslaved, imprisoned or executed them. However Sothe and I liberated Daein with the help of my friends in the Dawn Brigade.” Micaiah explained.

With all this firepower Krishna has at his disposal, I’m wondering why he doesn’t just order a full scale invasion on the Fangame Headquarters, wherever it is.

“Yeah, that was a rough time we all went through.” Sothe commented, crossing his arms. “That said, I have no idea what this Ashura-kai is. Do they have something to do with the Tellius Goddess, Ashera?”

“No. the Ashura-kai are a national crime syndicate that took over Tokyo following the emperor’s death. Their leader Tayama, is a ruthless tyrant who seeks dominion over all of Japan.” Shiv scowled. “My parents were slaughtered by the Ashura-kai.”

No, no; I have to step in here. Shiv’s parents abandoned him and Aurora when they were young. This creatively-bankrupt author retconned it so the readers have more reasons to hate his demonized strawman.

“Heh, didn’t realise I’d be able to get revenge on those cretins by helping you out.” Aurora smirked. “Guess I made the right choice after all.”

“Hmmm, seems that we’ll experience more resistance than I anticipated.” Adrienn muttered to xyrself. “Let’s just hope that the Divine Powers doesn’t send a deity to make things worse for us.”

“I doubt Krishna would allocate a deity to monitor some small-time rally.” Titania replied. “Besides, I should be able to take care of them.”

Given what happened last time, I’m confident that you totally won’t get your ass kicked.

“That’s true, I’ll give you that.” Garret commented. “Anyway, we can’t loaf around here all day, we’ve got a rally to disrupt.” The heroes agreed to the idea and proceeded to get ready before exiting the building.

Kinshi Park: Kinshicho

The traitors had finished setting up the rally, with the assistance of Elysion and the Ashura-kai. To their amazement, the rally had already attracted a sizable crowd as the traitors discussed among one another who would speak first. Eventually they all settled on Zenith opening the rally.

“Ladies and Gentleman, I thank you all for taking the time out of your day to come listen to us.” Zenith started his speech, as Elysion and the other traitors took their seat with some Ashura-kai grunts guarding the stage. “Now then, Ame and her followers keep proclaiming that their games are just for fun, and a hundred percent harmless. But that is a lie that she spreads among the masses with ease. These games have subliminal messages in them; maybe in a side-quest, maybe in the story itself.

“These games are brainwashing your children! I don’t know where exactly, nor do I know what they’re telling them to do, but I’m sure it’s very bad!”

These messages are brainwashing your children to rebel against authority and cause chaos and havoc in the streets. In fact, these games kickstarted a war that has killed thousands, and caused millions to flee the country as refugees!”

The crowd started booing and hissing at the games following Zenith’s speech, as Lavia got up on stage to speak next.

“But that’s not the only crime they’re guilty of. These fangames have also caused Nintendo and other companies to lose billions, forcing them to lay off thousands of workers who ended up starving to death alongside their families. The people who play and support these games have the workers blood on their hands. And let’s not forget how these games worsened racial tensions in several countries, causing small skirmishes that’ll eventually break out into a race war.” Lavia proclaimed, with the crowd cheering for her as Neved got up to speak as well.

I’m at a loss here; this author seriously thinks that those who dislike Pokémon Reborn believe it to be the cause of racism. What’s next, are the strawmen gonna blame Reborn for the rise of Hitler?!

“Then there’s the fact that the devs are hypocrites; they proclaim that the characters were made to give children, especially young girls and non-binary people positive role models. Yet they produce and sell merchandise that sexualise the female characters, and a few of the male characters as well. Naturally, there’s the dakimakuras they flooded onto the market, but then there’s this!’ Neved whipped out a thick magazine that featured Alice and Charlotte posing playfully on a beach while wearing their bikinis.

We get it; you jerk off to the idea of Serra wearing a bikini. Fuck off with your unquenchable thirst and start writing something worth reading!

“Pin-up garbage like this meant to drain the money out of the pockets of horny losers with nothing better to do with their miserable life.”

The crowd looked at the magazine for a bit, before a man in the crowd raised his hand. “Uhh, are you selling those?”

“Didn’t you hear me? They’ll drain—“Neved began.

“Now hold up there, we could make some mad bank off of this.” Elysion informed him, as it soon dawned onto him.

“Hey yeah, that is a good point.” Neved replied before clearing his throat. “Ignore that last comment I made about the magazine. You should buy it in order to deprive the fangame creators and their characters of whatever power they hold over you.”

“Buy this merchandise that they produced, putting money in their pocket. That’ll liberate you from their tyrannical grasp.”

Is this guy for fucking real?


The crowd started going crazy as they stormed over to the table where Lavius was and began buying magazines like crazy. Eventually they were completely sold out with the satisfied crowd making their way back to their seats.

“Thank you for your purchases, now we may—“ Lavia began, but was interrupted when a few smoke bombs were thrown onto the stage. The crowd fled away from the scene as the traitors turned to the source and spotted the heroes staring them down.

“No way in hell would I let you bozos get away with this!” Titania declared, bringing out her Aegislash as a few Ashura-kai goons walked up to her.

Get away with what, selling porno magazines featuring you and your companions? You’re a bit late to that, Titania.

“Heheheh, do you know who you’re dealin’ with? The motherfuckin’ Ashura-kai, that’s who!” a goon sneered in a thick accent.

“Couldn’t care less about who you are, now get out my way or else I’ll make you!” Titania threatened the goons, who whistled in response.

“Heh, seems that you got guts. I like that in a person.” An Ashura-kai lieutenant in a business suit whistled, digging his hands in his pockets as he ordered some of the grunts to move closer to her. “Too bad that my boys are gonna spill them all over this ‘ere pavement.”

“Oh well, can’t fault me for not trying the diplomatic approach.” Titania commented off-handedly as the goons brought out their weapons, which mainly consisted of nail boards and rusted metal pipes.

Because why bother pretending that these faceless chumps even have a chance of winning?

A goon charged at her while raising his board in the air, only for Titania to block the incoming attack and impale the goon’s torso with her sword, before kicked the goon off her blade. Within an instant, Titania lunged at another Ashura-kai goon and stabbed him in the heart before turning around and severing the arm off of an incoming goon from behind before stabbing him in the back. Another goon attempted to swing his metal pipe at her head, only for Titania to parry the attack and sliced the man’s head off, as it rolled on the ground for a few seconds. An Ashura-kai goon ran to a nearby tree and yanked a thin branch off before using his knife to carve a javelin out of the wood, while a few more grunts were battling Titania. As she had finished slaughtering the grunts, the goon took aim and threw his makeshift javelin at her, only for Titania to block the attack which caused the javelin to shatter into two.

Watch in awe as this author writes combat with the same amount of excitement as reading a stained cue-card can generate.

“Shit…” Was all the goon said, as Titania threw her sword at him, burying itself into the goon’s skull as he was thrown back a few feet into the air. The last thug took a few steps back before charging at her while bellowing a hoarse battle cry. Her blade freed itself from the deceased goon and flew back at her as Titania ducked and dealt a devastating slash; the grunt dropped his weapon and started gasping as his innards fell out of the gaping hole on his torso and splashed onto the pavement with a sickening squelch, before keeling over dead a few seconds later.

“What was that you said about my guts decorating the pavement?” Titania quipped at the lieutenant, a cocky smirk on her face as the lieutenant growled in anger.

“B-Bro, what are we gonna do?” an Ashura-kai goon inquired as the lieutenant took out his smartphone from his jacket pocket.

Call the Ghostbusters? They must be swamped with all the work they’re getting in this crazy universe.

“My demon will teach this bitch not to mess with the Ashura-kai…” the lieutenant hissed, fiddling with his phone as the goon hollered with glee.

“You’re in for it now! My bro’s demon is so tough, you’ll shit your pants in fear!” the goon sneered at the heroes.

“Charmed…” Titania replied dryly, turning to Astolfo and his friends. “You’ve dealt with demons before, haven’t you?”

“W-Well they were cryptids to be specific, but yeah—“ Chevalier began.

Cryptids, demons, whatever. They’re all faceless mooks who deserved to die for not playing Pokémon Reborn.

“Good enough. You can take this guy on.” Titania ordered, with the Servants of Fate sans Boudica gulping in fear.

“If it’s only one demon, I can tackle it on my own.” Boudica called out, taking a step forward. “Besides it’ll provide some much needed arm exercise.”

“Heheheh, it doesn’t matter how many of you step up to the plate, my demon will flatten you!” the lieutenant cackled, as his smartphone glowed brightly and a figure emerged from the phone and landed on the ground before the lieutenant. The figure was a spider the size of a large dog and had an ugly, human face with two horns growing out of its head. “Say hello to my Tsuchigumo!”

How disappointing…I was expecting something along the lines of a National Defense Deity with all the hype your demon got.

“Hmph, it’ll take more than some creepy-crawly to rattle my nerves!” Boudica retorted, drawing her sword. The Tsuchigumo charged up a beam of electricity from its large maw and fired it at Boudica, who stabbed the ground with her sword and raised her shield in response. The attack hit her dead on and Boudica winced in pain as the current coursed through her body, however the attack ended and Boudica shook the dirt off her sword, her body barely retaining any notable damage.

“S-She tanked that attack like it was nothing!” Roland gasped. “Why did it do far less damage than when Odin struck down Ame and Alice?”

“I’m pretty sure that a Norse deity would deal way more damage with their lightning strikes than some disgusting vermin.” Shiv replied, as the Tsuchigumo hissed in response.

That and the Tsuchigumo has a shit Magic stat.

“Yo, that attack did nothing!” the goon cried out.

“Oh shut up and keep watch!” the lieutenant hissed in response. Boudica took this opportunity to get on the offensive, lunging at the spider and swinging her sword a few times, severing a few of its legs. The Tsuchigumo screeched in pain as it collapsed onto the ground, giving the Britannian warrior an opportunity to deal the finishing blow. Once the demon was dead, it’s body disappeared into thin air, as the Ashura-kai goon’s jaw dropped in shock.

“B-Bro’s demon!” he cried out, surprised that it was defeated so easily. “Whadda we do now?!”

“The only thing left we can do…” the Lieutenant replied, before turning to face the other goons. “Retreat, RETREAT!!”

The Ashura-kai goons fled in fear, as the heroes scoffed at how their bravado vanished as soon as they lost the advantage.

“Now that was some fancy techniques you used.” Titania whistled in respect at Boudica, who gave her a thumbs-up gesture in return.

You slaughtered a pitifully weak enemy. Clearly you’re the greatest swordswoman of them all.

“Tch, piece of shit thugs.” Zenith hissed bitterly, unclipping a Pokéball from his belt and threw it at the ground. “Darmanitan, I choose you!”

“Hey, don’t you dare leave us out!” Lavia called out, as she and Neved sent out a Tangrowth and Gastrodon respectively.

“So it’s a battle you want, eh? I’ll make sure to wipe the floor with your asses.” Shiv retorted, sending out his Aipom, with Melia and Aurora sending out their Togekiss and Mightyena respectively.

And so it begins…

“Welp, seems they got the battle covered. Might take the chance to watch ‘em deck those traitors.” Garret grinned, sitting down on a nearby bench with the others following suit.

“S-Shouldn’t we be helping them?” Chevalier inquired.

“Nah, they can deal with them just fine.” Titania replied, easing the worries of the petite blonde.

And it’s another case of “Let’s sit here and do fuck all while our allies are fighting the villains.” Don’t ya love it when talentless hacks pull this shit all the time?

“Hah! You talk big, yet you brought out a bunch of weaklings!” Neved jeered at the heroes. “I mean seriously, an Aipom and a Mightyena? Talk about bottom of the barrel.”

“Oh I wouldn’t be saying that if I were you; this old dog can be taught new tricks. I’ll show you a couple if you like.” Aurora playfully smirked, before bringing out a Mega-Ring from her pocket and placed it over her wrist before activating it, as her Mightyena was enveloped by a glowing pink bubble. A few seconds later, the bubble burst open and Mightyena howled as it gained new power. It’s appearance changed as well, as it’s coat became a lot darker and it’s back hair and tail grew longer than before. There was also a red gemstone on its chest that let out a few waves of red energy, making it look as if it was wearing a necklace. Everyone present with the exception of Aurora and Shiv were startled at what they saw.

“There’s a Mega-Mightyena?!” Lavius exclaimed in shock, running over to see what the fuss was about, before turning to Zenith. “Torren has a lot of new Mega-Evolutions, why don’t you tell us about this one?”

“I don’t know jack about this thing! It’s the first time I’ve seen it as well!” Zenith shouted in response.

Yeah, this is one of the Mega Evolutions that’s exclusive to Desolation. Don’t ask me why Mightyena of all things got one.

“Can you two stop shouting and figure out a way to deal with that thing?!” Lavia snapped at the duo before turning towards the heroes. “Tangrowth, use Power Whip to punish that mutt!”

The hulking mass of vines raised its arm in the air and attempted to lay a smack down on the Mightyena, however the canine Pokémon disappeared into the shadows before leaping up from behind the Tangrowth and kicked the Vine Pokémon’s back, causing it to stagger forward a few feet.

“Shadow Sneak…” Garret commented. “Does Mightyena even get that move?”

“Don’t ask me, I have no clue.” Titania replied.

“Phony Mega, phony moves, you’re nothing but a dirty cheater!” Zenith hissed.

And while you’re making the villain complete idiots, have them act like spoiled toddlers when they don’t get their way.

“You know what they say, all’s fair in love and war.” Aurora smirked dangerously at the Infernal Cult leader. “Besides, it’s not cheating since the Mightyenite was a recent discovery in my homeland.”

“It’s not like you can complain about cheating, since you lot have no problem doing it yourself.” Melia retorted. “Happiness, use Air Slash on Tangrowth!”

Yeah, Melia has her own special nicknames for all her Pokémon. Between this and her shiny attracting powers, her wizardry in fixing up machines, her ability to travel through time, and her super powerful ‘light form’ that activates when she’s distressed, she’s well on her way to becoming a Mary Sue. The only way I can confirm it, is if I find out she give’s great head.

*looks around the area side-to-side, before checking under the table and being pleasantly surprised.*

Not bad…I’ll give her an 8/10.


The Jubilee Pokémon chirped happily and whipped up a large gust of wind on the spot using its wings, before flying back and whipping up another gust and sending them towards the first gust to destroy it, sending blades of wind at the Vine Pokémon, striking it dead on and causing it to fly back a few feet before fainting from the attack.

“Well that was quicker than I expected.” Aurora commented, her Mega-Mightyena trotting back towards her side.

“What the hell was that?!” Neved exclaimed. “Your Pokémon did jack shit!”

“Maybe if you two dumbasses did something, this wouldn’t have happened!” Lavia harshly retorted, returning her fainted Pokemon.

But that would require the author to do something other than jerking off, and that’s near impossible.

“Alright then, I’ll fix up your mistake!” Zenith replied. “Darmanitan, use Flare Blitz on the Togekiss!”

The hulking fire-monkey quickly scrambled up a nearby tree before leaping off of it and attempted to tackle Togekiss out of the sky, as the monkey cloaked it’s body in fire. However it was knocked out of the sky by Shiv’s Aipom as it hopped off of Togekiss and used Focus Punch on Darmanitan, knocking the monkey out of the sky and causing it to crash into the ground, rendering the poor Pokémon unconscious.

“This isn’t going to plan…” Zenith commented under his breath, recalling his Pokémon as Neved did the same.” Hey what are you doing?!”

“Ending this fight prematurely, because the author can’t be assed to write another battle.”

“There’s no way I’d be able to knock out all of their Pokémon on my own, I’m getting out of here!” Neved replied, before he began to flee from the area, with Lavius and Lavia following behind.

“This isn’t over!” Zenith shouted at the heroes, as he ran away as well. The heroes congratulated their Pokémon before recalling them into their Pokéballs.

“Well everyone, I say we did an excellent job at disrupting their rally!” Adrienn praised everyone. “Seems like they were all bark and no bite.”

“That’ll teach them to insult the fangames you all put your heart and soul into.” Astolfo chimed, wrapping his arms around Adrienn and Shiv.

Yeah, you punish those porn-peddling buffoons for saying mean things about your game. What a simpleton.

“I wish it was this easy all the time!” Garret grinned.

“The only reason it was easy this time was that Krishna didn’t send any deities to back them up.” Melia commented. “Besides, it’ll get boring if it was too easy.”

“Fair point.” Garret replied, as the large television on the side of the building near the park entrance began showing a news report.

“Breaking news! There’s been reports of a coup in the Begnion Empire, causing the nation to dissolve into chaos. Vice-Minister Lekain and several members of the Begnion Senate are believed to be the ones behind the coup, with several generals of the Begnion army joining their cause. There has been no word on the status of the young Empress Sanaki as well as those who still support her. Over and out!” The news reporter announced, as a worried expression appeared on Micaiah’s face.

What’s this, a piece of poorly written exposition that has the sole purpose of guiding the idiots to the plot?

“By the gods, I have to go rescue her!” Micaiah cried out as she began making calls to her fellows in the Dawn Brigade. “Sothe, I need you to pack out things ASAP!”

“You got it!” Sothe replied, as Melia stepped forward to halt the duo.

“Now settle down there, rushing into things won’t solve anything.” She called out to them.

“You don’t understand; if Lekain manages to seize power, it’ll be the end of Daein and her people!” Micaiah replied quickly, finishing her calls. “I’m really sorry that I have to pull out of here temporarily, but I can’t leave my people to fend for themselves.”

“Don’t sweat it.” Garret reassured her. “Nothing wrong with helping out your fellow countrymen. Besides, it’s not like we’re helpless waifs.”

True, though with how the author’s written you lot so far, you may as well be.

“Don’t be surprised if we take out a few of the traitors while you’re gone.” Titania added.

“Yeah! I’ll throw my lot in and teach that meanie a thing or two!” Astolfo declared, with the other Servants of Fate voicing their support.

“Y-you sure about this…?” Micaiah inquired. “The Begnion Army is no laughing matter; they will not be taking prisoners.”

“No need to sweat it sis, we’re with you till the very end!” Blair voiced her support.”

“Thank you all, so very much.” Micaiah smiled serenely at everyone, before a determined look appeared on her face. “Come on everyone, let’s teach Lekain a thing or two about teamwork!”

Astolfo and the group cheered enthusiastically as they made their way back home to start packing their bags.

“Let’s go save a foreign country from an oppressive rebellion, it’ll be so much fun!”

And thus begins the first major arc of this fic, the Tellius Saga. Will Micaiah and her friends save her homeland from Lekain’s tyranny? Find out in future instalments of Yugioh: the Divine Conspiracy!

And so another game gets thrown into this already confusing mess of a story. My apologies for being late, but I’ve been feeling somewhat ill recently, and need some time to rest and recover. Until next time, everyone.

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Flamvell Dilly (Defeated)
Lekain
Tayama
Big Smoke

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Izabella
Aisha
HMT
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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GorillaGamer
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Location: Adelaide: South Australia

Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sun Oct 28, 2018 3:56 am

Following that anti-climactic Pokémon battle, and the announcement of a jump to a new toybox to play in, the author’s now gonna pay tribute to the game in which he plucked Micaiah and Sothe from, though the tribute’s more of an insult if you ask me.

That aside, I decided to see what else this author’s writing, and the only other thing I could see was a Pokémon Rejuvenation story. The author says that it’s on hiatus while he waits for the next episode of that game to get released. From what I saw, it looks considerably better than this fic so I’ll leave it alone.


Welcome to the beginning of the Tellius arc of my fic, which will feature epic battles and sinister conspiracies. It’s a bit sad to see the fangame characters taking a little break, but that’ll make their return all the sweeter.

Oh good, we’re free from the author slobbering over Serra for a few chapters. That’s a relief, I guess.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards will be underlined, and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 11: Return of the Dawn Brigade

Manial Cathedral: Begnion capital of Sienne

“Ahhhhhh, the throne feels so good.” Lekain sighed to himself in bliss, sitting atop the throne that he stole from Sanaki. The coup had been far easier than he expected, likely due to a few demons that Krishna had loaned out to Lekain.

Krishna thought it would be a funny idea to send over a few Pretas and lie about them being able to take on entire armies by themselves.

Just then three more figures entered the throne room, with Lekain smirking at them.

“Gentlemen, how goes quashing the leftover rabble?” Lekain inquired them.

“I-It’s going well my liege.” Hetzel replied. Hetzel was a fairly frail old man with thinning grey hair. He was the Duke of Asmin and a senior member of the Senate. Though initially opposed to Lekain’s coup, he was too frightened to oppose the actions of the ambitious Vice-Minister.

And here comes the peanut gallery that the author was kind enough to give to Lekain.

“The Begnion Army were quick to clamour before our feet once their precious Zelgius went missing. How touching, uwee hee hee!” Valtome chuckled maniacally. He was a vainglorious, narcissistic man with long, curly brown hair that had a green ribbon tied at the end. He was fond of flaunting his wealth by wearing expensive jewellery, usually items that were gifted to him as a reward for his role as the Duke of Culbert. He also harboured a deep-seated loathing of Begnion General Zelgius.

In his defence, that was a pretty shitty move that the FEH developers pulled with Zelgius.

“Now that the rabble’s out of the way, we can exterminate those filthy Daeins once and for all!” Numida hissed. He had short black hair and a matching toothbrush moustache/goatee combo. As the Duke of Numida, he was tasked with ruling over Daein following the conclusion of the Mad King’s War, but oppressed the populace alongside his second-in-command, General Jarod. However the two men fled back to Begnion following Daein’s liberation at the hands of the Dawn Brigade. “I must say that it was wise of us to join forces with Krishna.”

“It was one of the best plans I’ve made so far. My one regret is that I hadn’t met him earlier.” Lekain commented.

Well when you consider the fact that Krishna was sealed in the ark under Kanda-no-yashiro, it’s not like you would’ve been able to—hey, wait a minute! How exactly was Krishna released in the first place? In SMT IV: A, the main character was tricked by Odin into released Krishna from the ark, did that happen in this fic as well? Was one of the traitors responsible for releasing him on their own volition? Or did his hatred of Pokémon Reborn give Krishna the strength to break out of their on his own?

“B-But wouldn’t he want our souls as payment? Ooh, I don’t want to die yet!” Hetzel panicked.

“Compose yourself old man, I doubt he would want your soul over one as beautiful and pure as mine, uwee hee hee!” Valtome laughed. “Anyway, what are we to do about those loathsome fangames that have infected our empire like a plague from the sub-humans?”

“Ah yes, I’d try to cure my mind from that feminist garbage that the Dawn Brigade shoved onto the populace.” Lekain replied. “As a matter of fact, Krishna wants the games gone as well.”

“Heheheh, how convenient.” Numida chimed in. “I’ve already destroyed all copies of the game in the region of Numida, as well as executing the villains who peddled that propaganda onto my citizens.”

How nice of these strawman to have the exact same personality, save for a quirk or two left in as a means of differentiating these glorified punching bags from each other.

“That reminds me, what about Oliver of Tanas?” Hetzel inquired.

“That hideous blob? He thinks those fangames are ‘art that needs to be protected for future generations to enjoy’. What a pea-brained simpleton.” Valtome scoffed.

“Oliver was always a disposable tool.” Lekain stated. “He was too busy scoffing down chocolates to assist us in our coup.”

“What a miserable pile of human garbage, allowing his citizens to be tortured by this twisted propaganda.” Numida hissed. “I say we execute him once he gets captured.”

And Oliver gets the hand of mercy because despite running an underground laguz trafficking ring, he likes Pokémon Reborn which instantly redeems him in the eyes of the author.

“That won’t be necessary; I’m sure the Dawn Brigade would do it for us, simply because he’s a senator.” Lekain replied. “It’s the least that bitch could do to atone for her sins, though I do have a few plans for her once we capture her.”

“Oh yes, I see where you’re coming from. But Branded trash isn’t worthy of being graced by my flawless presence, uwee hee hee!” Valtome chuckled.

“Branded or not, I’m willing to punish her for shoving that propaganda onto the masses.” Numida admitted.

“I-I-I…” Hetzel stuttered, opposed to the idea of violating Micaiah, but was too frightened to argue about it.

Rape, rape, rape, rape. Is that all that’s on Lekain’s mind once he took the role as Punching Bag No.54?

“Look, you don’t have to join in, but you better not dare stop us.” Lekain told the old man, noticing his hesitance.

“O-Ok then…” Hetzel replied meekly.

“Anyway, our next plan is to lock up our enemies and have Shesha feast on their souls.” Lekain informed his co-conspirators.

“How would you propose we do that?” Numida inquired, with Lekain grinning as he brought out his duel disk and deck.

“With this, the deck that was blessed by Lady Ashera herself.” He explained, his grin growing more malicious. “No mortal could ever hope to oppose me.”

It better be something along the lines of Tele-DAD or PePe with all the hype it’s getting.

Nevassa: Capital city of Daein

The heroes had arrived in the once bustling capital and saw a most horrifying sight; Begnion soldiers were running rampant, decimating the Daein Army and kidnapping innocent civilians.

“Oh my…” Chevalier gasped, the petite blonde on the verge of fainting.

“Quickly everyone, follow me!” Micaiah called out to them as they ducked into a nearby alleyway with Sothe digging through a stack of cardboard boxes as if he was looking for something.

“Come on…” he sighed to himself, digging though the boxes until his hand brushed up against a metal box attached to the building. “Jackpot!”

“I won a free cheeseburger at the local fast-food joint!”

“W-What are you looking for?” Astolfo inquired. However his question would soon be answered as a section of the wall started moving down on its own.

“The coast is clear, now move it!” Micaiah urged the group, as they all dove into the building with the wall rising back up once everyone was inside. The interior was rather dark and dusty, with a few candles lighting up the area giving the group a partial view of the area.

“Phew, this place could use some home improvement.” Blair commented.

Courtesy of Tim Allen? I’ll pass on that, thank you very much…

“We haven’t had the time to, given how busy we’ve been with other things.” Sothe replied, chuckling lightly as several footsteps could be heard in the darkness.

“M-Micaiah, is that you? A quiet, feminine voice could be heard. It was then that the darkness dissipated as the lights were switched on, and the group were confronted with a group of around seven people, four men and three women.

“Forgive me for my tardiness, I was caught up in other affairs.” Micaiah apologised, but none of the strangers looked angry or disappointed.

“Hey, hey, you didn’t do anything wrong.” One of the guys, a tall middle-aged man replied. “Heck you brought some reinforcements to help us out.”

“Reinforcements?” Astolfo pondered, until it dawned upon him. “Are you all part of that Dawn Brigade?”

“Yep!” another girl called out, this one being fairly short and rotund. “We’re the legendary heroes of Daein.

“Ah, but I kid. We’re a band of hardcore Pokémon Reborn fans.”

“I think it’s time we get the introductions out of the way; everyone these are the friends I’ve told you about in my letters home.” Micaiah introduced Astolfo and co. to the Dawn Brigade before turning to the former. “Everyone, these are my fellows in the Dawn Brigade. From left to right, they are Nolan, Edward, Leonardo, Laura, Aran, Ilyana and Meg.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you all.” Chevalier greeted them politely.

“Yeah, it is.” Ilyana replied, before she began petting her stomach lightly. “Any of you got food?”

“Uhh, I’ve got some potato—“Roland answered, bringing out a small pack of crisps before they were snatched from his hands.

“Thanks.” Ilyana replied, as she began chowing down on the chips, with Micaiah sighing to herself.

Evidently playing Pokémon fangames works up a mean appetite.

“Now that Ilyana’s satisfied, does anyone have a status update on Sanaki’s location?” she inquired.

“I’ve heard rumors from the Begnion soldiers that she’s rallying an army on the outer edges of Begnion. Sephiran of Persis and Oliver of Tanas have pledged their support to her, using their influence to garner support from the masses.” Edward reported.

“Oliver, you mean that oddball is fighting alongside the empress?!” Sothe exclaimed, refusing to believe it.

“Huh, what’s that matter with that?” Boudica inquired.

“Oliver’s a special case in the Begnion Senate. Originally he orchestrated a Laguz trafficking ring under the strict orders of Lekain, but was arrested for his crimes. He accepted a deal where in return from being spared the death penalty, he’d surrender a sizable amount of his fortune as compensation to the victims of his trafficking ring. To this day he has pledged his support for a new cause; to protect all that is beautiful in the world.” Micaiah explained.

Oh I see; the author made a retcon so that it was Lekain calling the shots, not Oliver. Subtle writing right there.

“So long as he isn’t committing any evil acts, I don’t see why his support is a bad thing.” Astolfo commented.

“I guess you’re right.” Sothe admitted, not too thrilled over the prospect of working with Oliver.

“By the way, what were you two up to while you were away?” Aran asked Sothe. “Did you finally pop the question?”

“No unfortunately, he hasn’t been able to ask Ike for his hand in marriage yet.” Micaiah joked around, as Sothe leapt back in embarrassment and landed on his backside, to the laughter of everyone else in the room.

We get it, Sothe has a craving for Ike’s cock; there’s no need to run the fucking joke into the ground!

“In all seriousness though, we got caught up in some serious business in Tokyo.”

“What kind of business?” Aran pressed further.

“Let me start from the beginning; Sothe and I were given tickets to the Pokémon Fangame rally in Akihabara where we met Ame, the head developer of the games.

You have got to be fucking kidding me!! It’s another pointless retelling of past events in an attempt to pad out the chapter! I hope it doesn’t get to the point where he starts putting it in the author’s notes before the actual chapter.

We soon took our seats after meeting the speakers for the event as they began their speeches. Things were going well until this trio of renegade deities stormed the stage, announcing that they’re the Divine Powers, and how they’ll lead us to salvation by destroying the fangames. Ever since then, we’ve been fighting alongside the Fangame community against the Divine Powers and their allies.” Micaiah recalled.

“W-Wait a minute, that broadcast I saw on TV showed this guy floating by Lekain’s side as he talked about conquering Daein.” Meg replied. “Could he be in this Divine Powers you told us about.”

“Depends, can you remember what he looked like?” Sothe asked.

“Well he had this green jacket, brown shorts, a hat with a feather in it, and that’s all I can recall…” Meg answered, before she remembered something else. “Oh! He also had this flute in his hands.”

“T-That’s Krishna!” Roland cried out. “He’s the head honcho of the Divine Powers.”

“Seriously?” Leonardo called out. “Why would Lekain follow orders from another deity, given his devotion to Lady Ashera?”

Yes, why exactly would Lekain do that? And no, author fiat isn’t an acceptable excuse.

“Now that’s a million dollar question if I’ve heard one.” Nolan mused to himself.

“It’s obvious that Lekain made an alliance with Krishna to take over all of Tellius; Krishna benefits from it by having Shesha consume all the souls of those who perished, no matter who they were.” Micaiah answered. “Shesha, in case you were wondering, is a colossal serpent that is vital to the Divine Powers’ plan, though how exactly is still a mystery to me.”

“A s-snake?” Laura began, a worried expression on her face. “I’m not good with snakes thank you very much.”

“Don’t worry, you won’t have to fight it head on. After all, they wouldn’t risk losing their most valuable asset now, would they?” Micaiah assured her.

It’s not like it can’t get harmed that easily. After all, it took wandering the Fairy Forest for hours, just to get a sword that can deal adequate damage to the critter.

“I-I guess so…” Laura softly replied.

“Anyway, what do you suppose we do now?” Edward inquired.

“We need to recapture the castle and ensure Pelleas is unharmed.” Micaiah informed everyone. “His safety is our top priority.”

“Pelleas?” Astolfo inquired.

“He’s the son of the late King Ashnard, the infamous Mad King, in case you didn’t know. Though they’re related, they have completely opposite personalities.” Sothe answered. “We helped him reclaim the throne during the Liberation of Daein.”

“So we have to deal with a bunch of soldiers to rescue the young king? I can work with that.” Boudica commented.

“Good to see that you’re up for it, now we need to get a move on ASAP!” Micaiah called out to them, as they all ran out of the building and onto the streets. It was there that they confronted several Begnion soldiers patrolling the streets.

“Excuse me, but have any of you found a free cheeseburger coupon? I lost it while I was plundering the city.”

“Well, well. Looks like our bounty was foolish enough to come to us.” One of the soldiers sneered at Micaiah. “At least you saved us the trouble of hunting you down.”

“Silence!” she snapped back. “You will pay for invading my homeland and terrorising her citizens!”

“Yeah, I’ll teach you not to mess with my friends!” Astolfo added, as the soldiers starting laughing like maniacs.

“Is this kid for real?!” another soldier guffawed. “Listen mate, you look like some generic waifu from a bargain-bin harem anime.”

He does, but since he’s a dude, that makes him all the more desirable.

“Generic; I’ll have you know I spent ages customizing my outfit to stand out from the crowd!” Astolfo retorted harshly. “I’m more recognisable than Rias Gremory herself.”

The soldiers started laughing even louder, with a few of them wheezing in pain as their lungs cramped up from laughing.

I would too if some guy went up to me and stated that he’s more famous that one of the most popular waifus in all of anime.

“By Ashera, that’s the funniest joke I’ve heard in a long time!” a third soldier replied, wiping a few tears of laughter from his eyes. “We should start a petition to have Lekain hire you as a court jester once we win the war.”

“How dare you poke fun of my friend!” Chevalier snapped, pointing his sword at them. “I shall cut you down for your vulgar comments.”

“Hey, hey. If the pink guy’s Rias, then does that make this guy Akeno?” another soldier joked, as they all proceeded to start laughing again, slapping their knees.

Speaking of which, my knee can’t take any more slapping.

“Clearly the standards for the Begnion army are pitifully low if you chucklefucks got in.” Sothe retorted coolly, as the soldiers ceased laughing and glared at him.

“Fucking excuse me; how dare you hurl insults at us you barnbred savage!” the leader of the group roared at him.

How progressive of the Begnion army to hire Sean Ashburn Krueger into their ranks. Though to be fair, this fic dos look like a slightly more polished version of Dragonlord0’s works.

“Hmph, seems like neither of you were taught any matters back in Begnion.” Nolan replied, unsheathing his axe Tarvos, which was gifted to him by Pelleas. “No matter, I’m more than happy to teach you for free.”

“Yeah!” Edward and Leonardo called out at the same time, unsheathing Caladbolg and Lughnasadh respectively.

“Oh my, seems that I’m hungry again. Oh well, I can always get myself something to eat once I’m done here.” Ilyana commented, as she and everyone else brought out their own weapons.

“Alright then, if you want a fight we’ll give you one. But you’ll be the ones who end up six feet under!” the head soldier retorted, as the Begnion soldiers drew their weapons.

“We’ll see about that.” Micaiah retorted.

What a stellar retort; I can see why you’re a force to be reckoned with.

0000

The group of Begnion soldiers got into formation, before the front line charged at their enemy with Edward, Nolan, Meg and Astolfo forming a defensive wall to intercept the attack before striking down the enemy with ease.

“Ilyana and I will head into one of the buildings to get a bird’s eye view of the area. We’ll be fine!” Leonardo called out to Micaiah, as the duo ran towards a three story building to the side of them. Blair then picked up a spear from one of the fallen soldiers, before following after the duo, saying that she’ll provide them with some protection from stray enemies.

You’ve got card games Blair, why not use them to kill the soldiers?

“Is that all you chumps got?” Sothe taunted, angering the soldiers.

“Kill them, kill them all!” the head soldier barked at his subordinates, as they all broke formation and bumrushed the heroes. A couple soldiers attempted to cut down Meg, but she blocked the incoming attacks with her sturdy shield before thrusting her lance into their soft, fleshy torsos.

“Better luck next ti—“ she began before a powerful attack pushed her back slightly. She soon noticed that her shield was bent in beyond repair. “Hey, that was my favorite shield!” Meg complained.

“Heheheh, well you know what they say, it’s hammer time!” a soldier sneered, wielding a heavy hammer designed to destroy heavy armor.

Evidently MC Hammer has fallen on hard times and took up a job as a faceless mook to be killed.

However an arrow struck the soldier’s right temple, causing him to slump onto the ground and die.

“Bullseye!” Leonardo quipped. “That’s one asshole down!”

Meanwhile, Aran and Chevalier were busy fending off a small group of soldiers, as they attempted to break through the defensive wall. The soldiers backed up and psyched themselves up for a brutal charge, however they were vanquished by a powerful beam of light.

“Oh my, did I surprise you?” Micaiah called out to the duo, flicking through her Thani tome. “At least you know why they call me the Priestess of Dawn.” She giggled at Chevalier.

Because vaporizing people is such a hoot, amirite?

“That was amazing!” Chevalier praised her. “The Divine Powers will be cast aside by your power.”

“You flatter me.” Micaiah replied humbly, covering her mouth with her hand. “Anyway, let’s get back to the task at hand.”

“Sure thing boss!” Aran replied, effortlessly slaying another Begnion solider. Meanwhile Boudica was surrounded by several soldiers, who all sneered at her.

“Give it up lady, we’ve got you outnumbered!” one of the soldiers jeered.

“I was merely giving you lot a fair chance, I do fight with honor after all.” Boudica retorted, angering the enemy soldiers.

“Kill her, kill the heathen!” the soldier growled, as they all charged at her recklessly. Boudica took advantage of their stupidity and began cutting them down one by one. A soldier had attempted to grab her from behind however she smacked the soldier with her shield and stabbed him in the chest, killing him instantly. Meanwhile, another soldier attempted to strike her down with his bow and arrow, but was slain by Nolan, who’d noticed the incoming attack. Another soldier lunged towards Boudica with a spear in his hands, however she dodged to the side and decapitated the foolish soldier. It was then that the head solider grew worried, as his men were getting defeated effortlessly.

Oh my, I’m shivering in excitement from this thrilling action—oh wait, I have the AC at full blast. Sorry for the confusion.

“Shit!” he called out. “W-We better fall back now!”

The surviving soldiers were fleeing the area, as the heroes began congratulating themselves. “That was a job well done!” Micaiah smiled at the group. “Now we have to reclaim the castle.”

“You said it boss!” Astolfo quipped, making a beeline towards the castle with several other members of the Dawn Brigade following him.

“Boss…” Micaiah smiled to herself, before she too ran for the castle.

0000

The group had stormed the castle and began fending off any Begnion soldiers that attempted to take them down. Eventually they made it to the hallway outside the throne room when they heard what sounded like a gurgled scream. Micaiah and Sothe stormed into the room, only to see a Begnion solider collapse onto the ground, a dagger wedged in his back, with Pelleas standing behind the fallen soldier, his pristine royal blue outfit caked in blood.

Finally, the useless little bugger did something.

“Don’t worry…it’s not mine.” Pelleas reassured the group. He was a fairly young man with short, curly blue hair and brown eyes. He wore a white cape over his regal outfit, which was also caked in blood.

“I’m so relieved to see you’re fine, your majesty.” Micaiah bowed before him, with the rest of the Dawn Brigade following suit. Astolfo and co also bowed before him, not wanting to appear discourteous.

“It’s a relief to see you alive as well Micaiah.” Pelleas smiled at her, before turning to Astolfo and his group. “Oh, and who might you be?”

“They’re the friends from Japan we told you about in our letters.” Sothe answered, introducing the newcomers to the young king.

“It’s so nice to meet you sire.” Chevalier commented.

“The same can be said for meeting you all.” Pelleas replied, clearing his throat. “I take it your time in Tokyo was most pleasurable.”

Oh yeah; fighting off angry deities with card games is such a thrilling activity!

“Oh it was amazing. I managed to get autographs from everyone who worked on the fangames!” Sothe grinned, eagerly showing off his notebook with all the signatures with the rest of the Dawn Brigade crowding around him. They were all happy for him, if a little jealous of his luck. “Too bad it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.”

“Yes, you did mention a group known as the Divine Powers. Care to divulge a bit more info about them?” Pelleas requested.

“So far they managed to recruit several powerful deities to their cause, and have captured thousands of souls around the world.” Micaiah reported. “Furthermore, they were the ones who helped Vice-Minister Lekain stage his coup alongside the other senators.”

“I figured that scoundrel would beg an outsider for help…” Pelleas muttered under his breath. “That aside, it seems like we’re on our own as the other nations are too busy repelling Lekain’s armies in their own borders.”

“Shit, that’s not good at all…” Sothe cursed.

“Aw, what’s the matter Sothe, upset that you won’t be fighting alongside your man-crush?” Laura teased, causing the young thief to flinch in embarrassment as everyone started chuckling.

Two times! Two times in the same fucking chapter this joke was used! Clearly the author flunked in comedy class at whatever school he enrolled at.

“Jokes aside, we need to form a plan if we want to end this war as soon as possible.” Pelleas informed the group. “We’ll meet back here in half an hour after everyone has taken a quick breather from all the fighting.”

“You got it sire.” Micaiah replied, as everybody left the room and went their separate ways temporarily.

And that’s it for this chapter. It’s a little lacking, which is something even the author points out. Here’s hoping the author puts in more effort into not reusing the same jokes over and over again in the next chapter.

Done. I had a bit of trouble writing this chapter, and I do apologise if it seems a bit lacking, but the next chapter should pick things up, especially since it’ll see a powerful alliance form between two former adversaries.

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Dawn Brigade:
Micaiah
Sothe
Nolan
Edward
Leonardo
Laura
Aran
Ilyana
Meg
Pelleas (not an actual member, but is a close associate of them)

Pokemon Fangame Community:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin stolen)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania (W.I.A)
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice (W.I.A)
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Flamvell Dilly (Defeated)
Lekain
Hetzel
Valtome
Numida
Tayama
Big Smoke

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake
Cal
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick
Professor Gobline
Radius
Redi
Sam
Elia
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Izabella
Aisha
HMT
Attachments
danny1.gif
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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