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Chapter 1
Title: Stalker Effect
Author: Knife Hand
Feedback: Constructive feedback appreciated, flames unappreciated
Spoilers: Nothing Specific, general for first few books.
Books?! Oh no. This has obviously been copied from a previous work and wasn’t fully revised. Was any effort put into this at all?
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect.
Summary: When he boards the Normandy for the first time Shepard is more than just an N7, he is part of one of the best military teams in the Galaxy. One that is more deadly than anyone knows, mostly because very few people even know it exists let alone what it is capable of. Not a crossover with anything else.
That sure sounds like something that should completely derail the starting plot of the game. But I bet it won’t.
"You coming with us Nihlus?" Lieutenant Alenko asked.
"I move faster on my own." The Turian Spectre replied.
Shepard resisted the urge to shake his head at the arrogance of the Citadel Operative.
Wow, already we have blatant mischaracterization of established characters for the purpose of uplifting the protagonist. Nihlus is supposed to be scouting ahead anyway. On top of this, a single operative is harder for enemies to detect, and he and Captain Anderson are confident in his abilities as a Spectre. But I guess that’s arrogance now. How soon is the pot going to meet the kettle, I wonder.
The Captain and the Spectre had come clean to Shepard about the Beacon found on Eden Prime but it felt like there was something else the Spectre wanted to say but the Captain had interrupted him.
After Nihlus was dropped off, Shepard shrugged in his Armour. He was not used to merely using Alliance Tech anymore. He was used to better.
Better than military grade? What, does it chafe or something? Does it limit your mobility? Is it not Phoenix pink? What?
Joker announced they had reached the second drop point and Shepard walked to the edge of the loading ramp and jumped onto the ground. Jenkins and Alenko followed him onto the ground. Shepard flashed a series of hand signals and could tell from their postures that both the other soldiers were confused, so he used much simpler Alliance gestures. The others finally figured it out and silently moved forward.
Simpler gestures? What the fuck is this idiot blathering about? What level of incompetence does it take, for the leader of a military squad to attempt non-verbal communication that his unit isn’t trained in?! You don’t get cool points for using “advanced” hand signals - this is like an American officer giving out orders in Russian! I’m going to hate this version of Shepard, aren’t I?
Rookies, both of them. Jenkins had never seen combat and even Lieutenant Alenko had only seen one or two small actions. That was the problem with the Alliance. Unless something completely unexpected happened, like the Eden Prime Incident, ninety percent of Alliance Combat was done by about two percent of units, both Marine and Navy. This resulted in a very few ships and ground units that are some of the most veteran and elite in the galaxy but the vast majority had very little or no combat experience.
Wouldn’t it then fall to you, as the much more experienced team leader, to make sure these greenhorns don’t get killed? Or is everyone and everything on this mission just beneath you, your highness?
Shepard, and to a much lesser extent, Alenko kept to cover but Jenkins did not seem to even know what cover was. Shepard was used to a much better team than this.
"Jenkins, keep to cover." Shepard ordered.
Jenkins did not seem to hear so he moved ahead and was gunned down by a pair of drones that came over the ridge ahead of them.
Oh, I see how it’s going to be. Everyone not the protagonist and his selectively chosen posse are going to be incompetent dumbasses, who couldn’t wipe themselves unless they had him give directions. What fun.
Shepard and Alenko immediately gunned down the two drones. After taking a moment to close Jenkins' eyes, and for Shepard to retrieve what ammunition and other equipment he could reasonably carry, they moved on towards the mission objective of the dig site. The next few groups of drones were taken down with little problem, thanks to Alenko taking much more interest in using cover and the fact they now had confirmation that there were hostiles in the area.
I guess the fact that the colony is under attack wasn’t confirmation enough.
The pair reached a rise and took cover behind a rock outcropping as they heard gunfire. An Alliance Marine rounded the corner at the bottom of the hill in front of them, running a zig-zag course and firing one handed behind her, and it was obviously a her, thanks to the anatomically appropriate chest plate of her armour.
A woman appears and focus is instantly on her chest. Classy.
From her movements it was clear that the Marine was both tired and had seen a lot of combat recently. A few moments after the Marine showed up, three synthetics appeared and were shooting at her.
"Take them." Shepard ordered.
Alenko took down one with his biotics and Shepard took down the other two quickly.
How? With an assault rifle? Biotics? Bare hands? All I know about Shepard is that he has disdain for everything around him. A little description could at least clue me in to his skill set.
Standing from behind cover, the pair made their way to the female Marine.
"Chief Ashely Williams, two-twelve." She said.
"Commander Shepard, from the Normandy. This is Lieutenant Alenko." Shepard said. "What's the intel?"
"The colony was attacked during chow. We responded but all of my unit was wiped out." Williams replied. "I think it's the Geth."
Or the Pixar desk lamp became a Terminator.
"The Geth have not been seen outside the Perseus Veil in three centuries." Alenko said.
"Not true, but close enough." Shepard interrupted.
Oh? Care to elaborate on that, or do I file this under ‘shit that is made up to make you more important’?
"But those are Geth. Williams, you did well. Can you lead us to the Beacon?"
"Yes Sir. I want some payback." Williams replied.
"Mission first, Williams." Shepard said.
Williams simply nodded and fell into formation. The Beacon was not where it was supposed to be, because of course it was not.
What’s with all this passive aggressive and dismissive narration? Securing the Beacon is their main priority, yet Shepard treats the Geth stealing it like an inconvenience. In fact, that’s how he treats everything. Even the death of a soldier under his command. Who is this asshole?!
Williams did well as they moved through the Colony. She dealt with the colonists who were turned into mindless Husks better than Alenko did. At the Spaceport they found Nihlus dead, shot in the back of the head. A dock worker, who was also running a smuggling ring, which made Williams pissed off, said that a second Turian, called Saren, had shot Nihlus. Once passed the spaceport, they found the Geth had set demolition charges, which Shepard allocated Alenko to disarm while he and Williams covered the Biotic and took down the attacking Geth.
Rushing things a little, aren’t we? I get that some parts of the game are less interesting than others, but this just jumps the entire reveal of Nihlus having been murdered. Then again, at least we didn’t have Shepard being needlessly smug towards a corpse.
They found the Beacon and Shepard ordered Williams to inspect it while he contacted the Normandy, but when Williams got close, it began dragging her towards it. Acting on command instinct, Shepard tackled Williams out of the way and was himself caught up by the Beacon. Nightmare images went through his mind. War, destruction, death. Familiar things but in a larger scale and more brutal.
The Eden Prime mission has already been grossly oversimplified; why not the Prothean message as well?
Shepard stood in front of the Citadel Council with Williams and Alenko flanking him. Captain Anderson and Ambassador Udina were also on the small podium across from the Council's plinth.
Time and space has only just managed to catch up, as the author decided to skip all buildup to this plot point.
Udina was not so quietly fuming while the four Military Personnel were much calmer, on the outside at least. The Human Ambassador was a real asshole, the kind who made arm-chair General criticisms of Military Operations with no understanding of the realities of combat, or anything outside his little political circle.
And I suppose you’ll make a much better politician than him, because anyone who isn’t you is just inferior in every way. This is getting old. Fast.
"The C-Sec investigation found nothing." The Asari Councillor said.
"Of course they didn't because there…." Saren began before the large hologram of the Spectre flickered and disappeared.
"Oh, it seems there is a transmission error." An Asari said sarcastically as she walked out of the crowed and stood just behind the railing around the gap that separated the rest of the chamber from the Council Plinth. "Though why an accused Terrorist and Traitor was even included on this meeting, I will never know."
Maybe, and now just follow me for a second here, maybe it’s because this meeting is specifically about these accusations, you vapid moron. Also, who the fuck are you?
"T'Soul" The Turian Councillor almost hissed.
A grin crossed the Asari's face. She was dressed unlike anyone else present. Her uniform was clearly military and a formal uniform but even so it was in a dappled camouflage pattern and she was armed with a submachinegun at each hip. Shepard had to struggle to keep a grin of his face at this particular Asari's appearance in the chamber.
I don’t think I would be able to keep a straight face either. She’s wearing army camouflage in the age of personal energy shields and light refraction technology. She’s a military hipster.
"That is General Lerros T'Soul, Commander of the Stalkers, if you please Councillor." The Asari replied. "And the reason C-Sec couldn't find anything was they have neither the capability or authority to investigate a Spectre. As you well know, Councillors, that is part of the Stalkers mandate."
"What are Stalkers?" Williams whispered, earning a shrug from Alenko.
Aside from the descriptor of obsessive and near criminal behavior in pursuing others, to the point where using the term for anything else would cause confusion in matters of law, I have no idea. But I bet big brain Shepard will passive aggressively inform us about it.
"Spectres are solo Operatives; Stalkers are small Combat Teams operating at the same level." Shepard replied just a quietly. "Part of the Stalkers mandate is to hunt down and kill rogue Spectres."
"That happen often?" Alenko asked.
"To lone wolf operatives with almost unlimited power? What do you think?" Shepard replied, rolling his eyes at the Lieutenant's naivetﾃｩ.
Fuck you, author, you pretentious asshole. And fuck your super-secret black ops group as well. First of all, the Stalkers are redundant. If a Spectre goes rogue, then another Spectre is sent to deal with them. It’s one of the major reasons Shepard was made a Spectre in the game. Secondly, the Stalkers obviously aren’t operating at the same level, because Spectres act on behalf of the Council, while Stalkers apparently take orders from a single person - who is somehow not held in contempt for basically mouthing off to the ruling body of the galaxy. Thirdly, Spectres receive a lot of power, but the people who are made Spectres are specifically vetted from candidates that prove they can handle the responsibility. The very reason the accusations against Saren aren’t being considered by the Council is because Spectres don’t often go rogue - but once they do, it becomes galaxy-wide news, as it did in the game, you pompously projecting Neanderthal!
Shepard did not bother to mention that the only Stalker whose identity was known, even to the Council that they officially served, was the current Commanding Officer, which for the last two hundred years was General Lerros T'Soul. It was a bone of contention between T'Soul and the Council that the Council had no say over the membership of the Stalkers, or even the size of the organisation.
My god, in how many ways can I express the stupidity of this secret military bullshit? The Council has all the say, because they are the highest authority in Citadel space! If they couldn’t control a branch of their military, they would abolish it! Keeping the Stalkers around - lead by this mouthy Asari, who has full decision over everything her paramilitary lackeys do - is asking for a fucking coup!
"As there is no evidence of a Rogue Spectre, the Stalkers need not get involved." The Asari Councillor announced.
"That is circular logic." General T'Soul replied.
How?! The logic is straighter than a Christian marriage! The accusations of Saren’s misdeeds are unsupported, so there isn’t a need for an internal affairs kill order. Circular logic is when a premise is based on its own conclusion. Don’t use term you don’t understand, author!
"Enough!" The Salarian Councillor said. "If there is evidence, I say let the Humans find it as they made the accusation. If they come up with anything, then we will see where it leads."
The meeting was adjourned and the humans gathered to talk away from the podium. No one else noticed T'Soul's slight nod to Shepard as she passed.
Despite the fact that EVERYONE should be looking at her. She barged in on a council meeting like she owned the fucking place and disrupted their communications. Do you really think no one would take an interest in her, author?!
Anderson and Udina were arguing over the next move. Udina wanted to use the Embassy's contact in C-Sec, some guy who had been the first Human C-Sec Officer but was now a drunk who had been suspended from duty. Anderson wanted to try Barla Von, a Volus Financial Advisor who supposedly also worked for The Shadow Broker, a secretive information broker. Neither option really appealed to Shepard, but he had his own contacts that he could use.
Because having multiple leads to follow becomes superfluous, when the author is whispering in your ear.
Anderson ordered them to get settled in the quarters the Captain had obtained for them and get some sack time before they made their next move.
Or whichever point in the plot the author lazily skips to.
TBC…
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Guess what everyone; Spectres are no longer the top of the military pecking order. The Stalkers are. And while Spectres are widely known as the Citadel’s top agents, no one are allowed to know who the Stalkers are. Which, if you think about it for more than five seconds, renders them incapable of acting as law enforcement. On multiple occasions over the course of the Mass Effect games, Shepard received cooperation from civilians and police, however reluctant it may have been, by name-dropping his Spectre status. People knew him as a Citadel operative, meaning he had full legal discretion to complete his mission. The Stalkers, on the other hand, would sooner be mistaken for mercenaries and risk police interference. How they can function in any capacity is a mystery to me. Let’s hope it is explained, if not at least excused, in the next chapter.
