Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

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ConcernedGamer
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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by ConcernedGamer » Sat Apr 13, 2019 7:31 am

I typically find myself morbidly fascinated whenever I mock a fanfic with sex scenes in them, wondering at first what I'm in for, even when it's made by an author I've already seen produce some before, like here.

Sometimes it's evidently so bland and note for note repeats of insert Peg A into Slot B and wiggle until simultaneous orgasm. Catering to the broadest of smut-devouring audiences, whether the author intended it or not, it's not unlikely that every word was inspired by something the author already read in other fanfics, mostly coming across as if we were getting a retelling of a porno the author likes.

And then there are the shameless fetish-niche kink-parades, where we get a front row seat to the author's personal and intimate fantasy, with the smut escalating in so specific an order and progression, that you are sure the author was getting off to it while wanting every single detail in mind happening to themselves. That is where it becomes less of being along the ride of a cheesy amateur sex tape, and instead second-handedly bearing witness to the author's private, self-pleasing jerk-off session.

I still find this story difficult to drag myself through, as the card games involved hold no interest with me, but the rest of it is decently mocked, so keep up the good work. With all these characters being thrown in, I wonder how abrupt it will feel when it ends, because justifiably almost every chapter so far has needed another to close off what was introduced.

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GorillaGamer
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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Sat Apr 13, 2019 8:46 am

@StabbyKobold: Thanks for the comment. I’m curious as to which characters you keep an eye on specifically, given your grievances with the sheer amount of them. I will warn you that not only will there be even less restraint in the upcoming chapters, but the soapboxy opinions will keep rolling in, as this chapter proves.

@ConcernedGamer: Thanks for the comment as well, can’t blame you for finding it hard to drag through this fic. The commentary regarding sex scenes in a fic was rather interesting; personally, I feel that the author falls into the second category, where we’re given a front row seat to the author’s fantasy, much like Cain and Adrienn. This is especially evident with the first-person virtual reality lemons, but could apply to the entire concept of sexualizing the Pokémon fangame characters themselves, given how porn of them is virtually non-existent.

So yeah, as the warning states there will be more of Junpei’s opinions being thrown into the mix. The silver lining is that this chapter’s fairly mild when compared to the last few I mocked, though unfortunately there’s a Pokémon battle in it, as the author’s notes state.


This chapter may be a little slower, but it’ll add some more characterization to Plasma Tech. mind you, it’ll still be an exciting spectacle for you all to watch, as it’ll feature a Pokémon battle! And with that said, let’s get on with the show

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards/skills will be underlined and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 27: Fusion Frenzy!

Fuck yeah, I loved that game as a child! Just a shame that it was hard to get back then, outside of buying trashy gossip magazines.

Pokémon Fangame Headquarters: Later that night

Everyone had gathered inside the meeting room to discuss the potential benefits and drawbacks from merging with Plasma Tech. A few of the attendees exchanged amused smirks with Astolfo and Boudica, having heard the two in action a while ago.

“Thank you all for taking the time out of your day to come to this meeting. I know that some of you were busy with other matters, especially a certain couple who decided to get down and dirty…” Ame began the meeting, throwing an amused smirk over at Astolfo and Boudica, who chuckled lightly in response.

Did you also point out the two bystanders who watched the fuckfest? Seriously, what the hell was up with that?!

“Now the reason why I called you all here today was to discuss the prospect of an alliance with Plasma Tech, since it seems that we’re on the same side.”

“I don’t know, that N fellow seems nice, but I feel he has an agenda hidden up his sleeve.” Astolfo replied, raising his hand to his chin. “That and I haven’t tried the first Fusion Generation yet.”

“Honestly, this proposal is some of the best news we’ve gotten in a long time. With Plasma Tech on our side, we’ll be more than just a little independent studio squaring off against an international cult led by a bunch of ancient deities.” Garret grinned. “Besides, I’m sure they’ll treat our games with the love and respect they deserve.”

Heh, if your lucky. Most studio takeovers end in several beloved IP’s getting thrown into a corner, only being brought up to enforce questionable copyright laws.

“I’m not 100% sure on that last part; I recall hearing stories about how easy the first Fusion Generation game was. Perhaps they’ll lower the difficulty to make it more appealing to the consumers.” Melia commented. “After all, it’ll make sense from a business perspective.”

I don’t know; I don’t envision Reborn adding in a ‘Game Journalist’ difficulty, that cuts out all the Pokémon battles.

“I guess they could add in a difficulty option to satisfy both parties, perhaps add in an even harder difficulty or some optional game-modes like what I implemented into Insurgence.” Nora added. “Although, I can’t say I know why people label Fusion Generation a cakewalk.”

“N gave away the reason when he talked about the benefits of fusing Pokémon; they gain the combined stats of their components, and access to their full movepools. It’s easy to see why they’ll give the player an edge over the competition.” Aurora responded, as a devious idea formed in her mind. “Perhaps we should join them, if only to get our hands on a few of their fusions.”

“And how do you know that these fusions are a genuine thing, and not the result of an overactive imagination?” Besides, I wouldn’t trust you to take care of a fusion even if my life depended on it.” Shiv retorted.

Boring. Why can’t we watch the axe-crazy sadist clean house with a team of busted Fusionmons? It’ll be much better than this schlock.

“Hmph, you’re no fun at all!” Aurora pouted, a mixture of playfulness and annoyance in her tone.

“Truth be told, I’m a little weary regarding this alliance. After all, it seems like Plasma Tech is going to get more out of this deal then Starlight Studios.” Roland pointed out.

“Thank you, I was just about to say that! Who’d thought that we would both come to the same conclusion.” Titania called out in response to Roland’s comment. “I’ve heard stories about how opportunistic Plasma Tech’s CEO is when it comes to acquiring new properties. It wouldn’t surprise me if he starts milking our games once he gets his mitts on them.”

Well considering how you yahoos aren’t charging people for your games, you can’t blame this CEO for trying to make bank.

“Yeah, just think of all the merchandise they’ll produce. T-shirts, doujins, replica jewellery, figures, those cute little stickers you see people put on their laptop, the possibilities are endless in his eyes.” Amaria strengthened her lover’s argument, as she rested her hand over Titania’s hand. “Of course, it wouldn’t surprise me if he pulls a Ren and mass-produces some dakimakuras.”

“Great, just what we needed in our lives…” Melia retorted sarcastically. “In that case, I’m not longer interested in allying with him.”

Oh come on, I could buy a dakimakura and give it to the author in order to quell his insatiable hormones. Why must everyone be a party pooper in this chapter?

“Now don’t get like that over what could be a possibility. Besides, we could strike a compromise where Plasma Tech is forbidden from releasing sexualised merchandise.” Micaiah chimed in.

“I guess that could work…” Melia replied. “Anyone else want to voice their opinion on the matter?”

“As a matter of fact, I do. For the most part, I think that it’s a wise idea, but I hope they don’t take most of the money for themselves.” Adrienn chimed in. “Perhaps a 15% cut for them would suffice.”

“Eh…a little to high for my liking. 10% sounds fair.” Ame put forth her own opinion. “Though if push comes to shove, I’ll be willing to accept the 15% cut.”

“Wait, there’s something I don’t quite understand. From the way N put it, it seems that Plasma Tech is no friend of the Divine Powers. By that logic, they would’ve tried to disrupt their rallies and presentations, yet they haven’t made a single move against them. I wonder why that’s the case.” Sothe inquired.

I’m sure many of you have come up with various theories about how N’s in Krishna’s pocket, hence protecting his company from subjugation via giant snake gods. Me? My theory is that there haven’t been any attacks, because the company itself didn’t exist until the previous chapter in some sort of hastily inserted plot device.

“My guess is that they haven’t deemed Plasma Tech to be a significant threat, since I don’t recall seeing anything that could’ve offended the old gods, whoever they are.” Alice put forth a suggestion. “It’s the best guess I have at the moment.”

“Or they could be chummy with Krishna and have ordered their CEO to try and buy out Starlight Studios in an attempt to destroy your games under the banner of a business transaction.” Boudica offered another possibility. “That comment N made could’ve been a ruse to lower our guard.”

“Come to think of it, that’ll explain why Plasma Tech haven’t popped up on our radar until now. I’m sure that if they really were against us, Krishna would’ve crushed them effortlessly, and used their defeat as a show of power in order to frighten us into submission.” Alice replied, liking the second possibility more than her own. “Any final thoughts, mother?”

“Honestly, I’m a little weary of allying with them after what Boudica just said; the prospect of playing into our enemies’ hands is something that I would want to avoid at all costs. But at the same time, I don’t want to turn down an offer of support from a potential ally. Besides, I doubt that Plasma Tech would ally with the Divine Powers, since the latter despises the fangames, and would do anything in their power to destroy them.” Ame offered her final thoughts. “That’s all for tonight; you may head back to your rooms.” She continued, as everyone proceeded to go their separate ways.

Finally, we’re free of these pointless meetings…for at least another chapter or so.

Tsukiji Kongangi: Cafeteria

The room was rife with the sound of chatter, as the lieutenants were having a blast testing all the Nuka-Cola that they were given following the acquisition of all the shares in the Nuka-Cola Corporation. A few seconds later, Musashidou entered the room, and was the target of a rooms worth of applause, with the heavyset man accepting the praise as he made his way over to his co-workers.

Congrats on getting everyone to drink women’s cum, Musashidou. You’re totally off the birthday list.

“’Hahahahahahaha! This is the life; purchasing more shares to fatten up my wallet and getting to test my product as much as I want!” Musashidou grinned, opening a bottle of Nuka-Cola and chugging it quickly.

“I’ll admit; your purchase came right out of nowhere, I wish you had informed me about it beforehand. That said, it was a wise decision to increase the revenue flowing into the Divine Powers.” Hongou complimented his co-worker’s decision. “Additionally, these beverages would boost our troops morale by quite a bit.”

“It’s the closest they’ll ever get to losing their virginity.”

“Quite right; nothing beats the refreshing taste of a Nuka-Cola after work. Which reminds me…” Nijisaki added, before he passed over a bottle of Nuka-Cola Quantum over to Kubota. “Here, the newest flavor they released. I dare you to try some.”

“W-Why me, why am I a-always the g-guinea-pig?!” Kubota protested, which attracted the attention of the other lieutenants.

“Aw come on mate, live a little for once.” Johnny chimed in.

“Yeah, the soda pop’s not going to bite you or anything…” Caesar added, swigging a bottle of Nuka-Cola Wild.

They’re right. It’s just that the largest source of the stuff is located at a park crawling with Raiders, Bloodworms and giant, bipedal alligators that can tear through steel with ease. Tickets start from 49.99 per person.

Eventually, Kubota gave into the peer pressure and in an instant, unscrewed the cap and gulped down half the contents of the bottle; the bespectacled man surprised by the incredibly sweet taste of the drink.

“H-Hey, this is rather nice—” he began, before his stomach started churning. A panicked look appeared on his face as he bolted up out of his seat and ran out the room in the search for the nearest toilet, as everyone laughed at his detriment.

“Hahahahahaha! I love the ol’ laxative trick; it never ceases to put a smile on my face!” Nijisaki chortled to himself.

Yes, the middle-aged man who took part in an experiment that nearly got several kids killed is now acting like a drunken high-school freshman. You may proceed to groan.

“Y-Yeah, that was a funny joke. J-Just don’t turn it against me.” Roman Bellic complemented the executive, hoping to avoid becoming a victim himself. His gaze soon focused onto Yuuto, who still had his trademark sex-addicted grin on his face. “Hey brother, got any idea who this guy is?”

“I don’t know; I tried asking several of the other lieutenants, but even they are at a loss. Just where on earth did Krishna find this wacko?” Roman’s brother, Niko answered.

You tell me; I don’t know how Mr. Hentai Guy got here, nor do I know why he is here.

Roman expected Yuuto to snap at Niko for insulting him, but was surprised to see that he still hasn’t said a word.

“Allow Dr. Ryder to fix the mute.” Ryder bragged, walking over to Yuuto with a bottle of Nuka-Cola in his hand. “Here, have some medicine on the house.”

Eh, I’d rather trust Dr. Pepper than this chump.

The room became eerily silent, as Yuuto turned to face Ryder, the sex-addicted grin still plastered on his face, as he stared at the gangster for several minutes. Eventually, Yuuto got up off his seat and proceeded to walk backwards out of the room, his gaze never breaking away from Ryder. Everyone was at a complete loss as to what they just witnessed. “Man, just what the fuck is up with that guy?!” Ryder asked out loud.

“As one of the worlds most esteemed neurologists, I can safely say that he’s got some sort of psychological disorder.” Yasuke answered, heavily invested in his manga book. “Though what disorder he has is a mystery to me.”

Well thanks for the info, bub. For a neurologist, you certainly aren’t living up to the role.

“Anyway, we should go back to—” Roman began, before the door slammed open, frightening the middle-aged man as Dio stormed into the room, his face twisted with so much rage that he looked more like a bloodthirsty monster than a human being.

“T-THAT MISERABLE OLD FUCK!” Dio roared with a fury unlike anything the other lieutenants have seen. “THE NEXT TIME I SEE HIM, I’LL TEAR HIS FUCKING FACE OFF!!”

“Oh, what’s troubling you, Dio?” Hongou inquired, as the ringmaster glared viciously at him.

“That senile fuck Tayama ratted me out to Odin, only for the asshole to pick me up and throw me like a fucking footall!” Dio ranted, clenching his right fist with the index finger pointing upwards, while his left hand was cupping his right elbow.

“The worst part was that it wasn’t even a goal. Some deity, am I right?”

“Ah yes, I remember that. It was quite the show…” Tayama sneered at him. “I’m surprised you’re still walking after getting thrown around like that.”

“That wouldn’t have happened if you had kept your trap shut about MY wife.” Dio hissed in anger.

“Serra is my prize, and my prize only! How many times do I have to tell you this?!” Tayama retorted angrily, clenching his fists tightly.

I’m so fucking close to putting up a damn counter for this fucking spambot line, but I don’t want to piss myself any further by keeping count of this shit.

“Fuck off! How would you feel if I decided to start pinching babes off of your harem list?” Dio sneered, as everyone else in the cafeteria started to get invested in the argument.

“Y-You wouldn’t—” Tayama’s air of confidence started to crumble before him as he started sweating like crazy.

“I would; and as a matter of fact, I’ve got this!” Dio sneered, taking out Tayama’s harem list from his jacket. “Under my sleeve. Now let’s see who the big bad Tayama is eyeing off, asides from my wife, that is.”

…how did you get that when you were thrown like a football after Krishna and Co. read the thing?

“For the last time, she’s my—” Tayama began.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. She’s your prize and your prize only. That’s the only damn thing you say.” Yasuke dryly retorted, causing the yakuza boss to grit his teeth in anger.

When the damn fic knows how annoyingly repetitive that line is, you’re doing something seriously wrong.

“Now hurry up with the list already.

“Alright then, let’s see who he’s got ready for his Tic-Tac dick…” Dio began as his eyes started scanning the list. “Oh my…Oh my golly goodness, this is fucking hysterical. You’re actively lusting after SHELLY of all girls!”

“Eh, who is this Shelly girl?” Roman inquired.

The cutest little cinnamon roll of them all. Well asides from Scarlett, but she’s in an entirely different league.

“Long story short, she’s around 12 years old from what I heard, but she’s most likely younger than that.” Dio exclaimed, as everyone started giving Tayama looks of disappointment and contempt.

“D-Don’t judge me! Love has no age!” Tayama bellowed in anger.

“Tch, people like you are part of the reason why I joined Lost MC to begin with; can’t believe I’m working with a kiddie-fiddler.” Johnny scoffed in disgust.

“Hmph, this would definitely tarnish Cradle Pharmaceutical’s reputation if the public were to find out.” Nijisaki commented, taking a small sip of Nuka-Cola Victory as Tayama glared at him.

“You have no right to criticise me when your damned company experimented on children!” Tayama retorted in order to regain some ground.

“True, we did experiment on children, but it was for the greater good. Besides, at least we had no plans on molesting them.” Hongou countered,

That we know of.

causing Tayama to start seething since his best argument got shot down.

“Oh but it gets better, not only is he eyeing up Shelly, but he’s also got several other little girls on his list. There’s Anna, Heather, Luna, Maria, do I need to go on?” Dio continued his ruthless mocking of his nemesis, as his attention was soon directed to a few other names on the list.

Hmmm…something doesn’t fit right. Give me a moment…

*one minute later*

Aha! Found the retcon. Maria/Marianette wasn’t on the original harem list we saw all the way back in Chapter 8. I guess she was a last-minute addition for Junpei’s harem—wait, why is he demonising Tayama for having a harem list exactly like his?!


“Oh my, looks like Tayama is hoping that he’ll get to pipe Ame and Alice, probably at the same time.”

“GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I bet he’s into mommie-daughter action!” Armstrong mocked the bespectacled man.

“I-I am not!” Tayama snapped angrily, glaring daggers at the beefed-up senator.

“To give him some credit, he may not be into mommie-daughter action. However, given that he’s lusting after Charlotte, Laura and Saphira, he may be into sister-sister incest.” Dio continued, as more looks of disgusted were directed at Tayama.

“What a degenerate fetish; such filthy genes should die off an e removed from the gene pool.” Greyfield scoffed at Tayama in disgust. “In my ideal world, only those with strong genes will survive!”

Well my jeans are nice and comfy—oh, wrong genes. My apologies.

“So what else is on that sad man’s list for us to mock?” Caesar inquired.

“Well let me see here—oh my, seems like Tayama’s a greedy bastard. Just look at all the girl’s he’s hogging for himself—what’s this, Aurora? Isn’t she the chick that’s into bloodplay?” Dio inquired.

“Apparently, from what Tressa told me.” Hongou commented. “I can’t say that I’m all that interested in bloodplay.’

How does she…you know what, I’m not gonna ask.

“Look on the plus side, she can cut his dick off; preventing him from piping Dio’s wife and the little girls.” Roman chimed in, as everybody excluding Tayama started laughing once more.

“T-This isn’t over! I will get my harem, and when I do I’m gonna make you all pay for mocking me, especially you!’ Tayama declared, pointing viciously at Dio as the crime boss stormed out of the room. Around a minute later, Kubota had come back from the bathroom and sat back down on his seat.

“W-Who put laxatives in m-my drink?!” He demanded an answer.

“Ah, my buddy, you missed out on the best roast in a lifetime. Tayama got ousted as a pedophile and Dio went to town on him.” Musashidou wrapped his thick arm around the skittish man.

“W-Why is it that I always miss out on all the e-exciting confrontations?!” Kubota complained.

Because no-one likes you.

“That’s just how life goes…oh and I was the one who spiked your drink.” Nijisaki answered.

“Wait, what’s this I missed?” Dio inquired.

“Long story short; I spiked his drink with laxatives and dared him to try it. He gulped it down instantly, before running out the bathroom like a complete loon.” Nijisaki recalled, as his co-worker frowned at him.

“T-That wasn’t funny! Thanks to you I missed out on an amazing roast session!” Kubota snapped at his superior.

Eh, amazing is an exaggeration. I’d call it…tolerable, and that’s being generous.

“Oh man, I wish I could’ve seen it.” Dio commented. “That said, I’m gonna try out this Nuka-Cola stuff; I need some refreshment after that roast session.” He continued as he went to the counter to choose a drink for himself, before sitting down on an empty chair to chat with the other people in the room.

Pokémon Fangame Headquarters: The next day

The atmosphere in the meeting room was tense; Ame had finished finalising the date and time for a meeting with the CEO of Plasma Tech in order to further discuss the possibility of a temporary alliance to deal with the Divine Powers. Ame had a few of her high command by her side, with Astolfo and Co. providing additional back up in case things go downhill. Time seemed to pass by slower than usual as the young woman kept glancing at the clock, wondering when they’ll arrive. Her question was soon put to rest when the sounds of a helicopter arriving and landing on the roof echoed throughout the room.

“Remember to stay calm; it wouldn’t do us any good to lash out at them.” Ame reminded her allies, as they heard footsteps walking down the hallway to the meeting room door. The door opened, as a few figures in suits flanked the green-haired couple who entered the room. Astolfo immediately recognised N, who had a passive look on his face, but was at a loss as to who the older man with a red eyepatch over his right eye was. He had a calm, yet intimidating look in his eye, which indicated that he was the type who would cut to the chase as soon as possible.

“I thank you for granting us the time to discuss matters with you. I am Ghetsis Harmonia, CEO of Plasma Tech. I’m sure you’ve met N the other day, Ms. Winthrop.” The older man introduced himself, brushing a speck of dirt off his suit.

Ghetsis, an honest CEO? You must be huffing something, author!

“Indeed, we have Mr. Harmonia; we learnt quite a bit about Pokémon Fusions during the presentation.” Ame replied calmly, though the tension in the was incredibly thick; so thick that it could be cut with a knife.

“Wonderful, that saves us some time. Any thoughts on whether you want the alliance or not?” Ghetsis inquired.

“Well we have a few questions we want to inquire about; mainly if Plasma Tech is planning on changing the base game.” Melia requested an answer.

“Oh, I can answer this one; the only thing we’re thinking of adding is a difficulty option at the beginning. That way your game is open to a wider audience. As for the story we have no plans on fine-tuning it, unless you have any desire to do so.” N answered, confirming Nora’s suspicions about their plan.

“If that’s the only change your planning on implementing, then I guess we can live with it.” Ame replied.

Yet when Tressa tried to implement it, you sacked her ass. Double standards are a bitch, aren’t they?

“Sorry to but in, but how will the profits be split between our studio and yours?” Garret inquired.

“Plasma Tech will take a 10% cut of the profits as a publishers fee; the remaining 90% is all yours.” Ghetsis answered. “I hope that’s satisfactory enough for you.”

“That’s much better than we were expecting!” Garret grinned, as he noticed that Astolfo had a strange look on his face. “Something the matter?”

“I was just wondering why exactly Plasma Tech is interested in joining forces with our studio.” Astolfo replied, as he soon noticed the serious look on Ghetsis’ face.

It’s the dakimakuras, isn’t it.

“I’ll be blunt here, it’s for our mutual benefit.” Ghetsis answered. “The Divine Powers, they’ve been at your throats for quite some time now, and from what I’ve heard they’re getting stronger by the day. I’m sure you know about the current loyalty of your former Marketing Director.”

“Yes, we know about Tressa’s allegiance with the Divine Powers…” Ame replied.

“Good, good. This is further complicated by her deal with the CEO of Nintendo, which lead to the subsequent destruction of several independent studios. I have no doubt that Krishna seeks to gain control over the entire gaming medium. Which is why we need to make this alliance, for our survival.” N added to his father’s argument.

That’s nice and all, but what does any of this have to do with his ultimate goal of creating a new universe to rule over?

“And I’m sure that your super powerful fusions would put the odds in our favour. How do we know they’re as strong as you say they are?” Astolfo rebutted, as Ghetsis thought up of a solution to the predicament.

“Perhaps a little battle would be sufficient proth; my son versus your daughter in a 3-on-3 battle. Any objections?” Ghetsis proposed.

“Depends on how my daughter feels about this…” Ame replied, turning to Alice for an answer.

“I’m more than happy to take one for the team!” Alice boldly declared.

“Wonderful!” Ghetsis replied, a small smirk on his face. “Is there an area we could use for the battle?”

“As a matter of fact, there is. Allow me to escort you there.” Melia chimed in, as the group exited the room and proceeded to make their way to the indoor arena.

So this game studio has an indoor arena, enough housing for 30+ occupants, a large courtyard to host parties in, and several other luxuries. Are they by any chance located in the emperors' house or something?

0000

Both Alice and N had gotten ready for the ensuing battle, as the spectators sat down in the stands to watch the upcoming battle, knowing that the future of both organisations is determined by the outcome of this battle. As a gesture of her goodwill, Ame decided to let Astolfo be the referee for this battle.

“Ok then, according to the agreement, this’ll be a 3-on-3 Singles battle between Alice Winthrop from Starlight Studios, and N Harmonia from Plasma Tech. the battle is declared over when one side has all their chosen Pokémon faint, and substitutions are allowed. Any problems.”

“Fine by me.” N replied, turning to face Alice. “Well you know what they say, ladies first.”

“Alright then, but don’t come crying once I defeat you.” Alice smiled as she reached for a Pokéball and threw it to the arena. “Alright, Blaziken, it’s time to shine!”

“Hah! In that case I’ll chose Carveel!” N retorted, as both trainers sent out their Pokémon, with the tall fire chicken eyeing up its strange new opponent. The Carveel had the head and color scheme of a Carvanha, and the body and tail of a Seel, as it fired a large chunk of water to create a shallow pool and slip into the body of water.

At least the author’s kind enough to describe these Fusionmons, even if it is barebones.

“This is gonna be interesting…at the very least it appears to be at its basic stage.” Alice mused to herself as she soon decided her first move. “Blaziken, use Sky Uppercut on Carveel!”

The large chicken ran towards the hybrid Pokémon, it’s fist glowing a harsh blue as it attempted to deliver a wicked blow to its opponent. The attack collided, causing the hybrid to hiss in pain as it was sent rocketing through the air, only for it to smirk as it soon cloaked itself in water and charged at Blaziken at rapid speeds, striking it head on and made the chicken stagger back a few feet.

“Woah! For a small Pokémon it packed a real punch!” Melia exclaimed in a mixture of shock and awe.

“So this is the power of a Pokémon fusion…” Garret mused to himself.

Oh please, there’s several of them that are even more broken than that critter. Why can’t he use them instead?

“Impressive, but it’s gonna take more then that to best me. Blaziken, use Quick Attack followed up by another Sky Uppercut!” Alice called out, as her companion lunged towards the hybrid at blinding speeds, it’s fist glowing harshly once more as it was preparing to land its attack. However the Carveel dodged at the last second and fired an Ice Beam directly at it’s opponent, before following up with an Aqua Tail that sent the large chicken flying backwards and crumpled into a heap onto the floor, catching all the Starlight Studio workers by surprise.

“Blaziken…” Alice cried out in concern, rushing over to her injured companion and comforting it before sending it back into it’s Pokéball.

“Now you know the power of our fusion Pokémon; do you still wish to continue the fight?” N inquired, eyeing her up curiously.

“As a matter of fact, I do.” Alice replied, reaching for her next Pokéball. “Now, Ninetales, it’s time for battle!” She sent out her next Pokémon, which caught N by surprise as it was the Alolan variant, as opposed to the regular variant.

Like mother like daughter, I suppose.

“In that case, I’ll make a legal substitution and switch out Carveel for Slomaka!” N called out, switching his fusion for a second one, as his Pokeball opened and a creature with the face and colouration of a Darumaka, and the body of a Slowpoke emerged onto the field emerged onto the field, only to step away from the water puddle.

“So errr…where did ya find that fella?” Astolfo inquired.

“Trade secret, perhaps when you join us, I might tell you about it.” N replied. “Now I believe it’s your move.”

It involves anal sex, doesn’t it?

“In that case; Ninetales, go for Hail and follow up with Aurora Veil!” Alice declared as her companion summoned a vicious hail storm, before creating a wonderous wall of light using the falling hailstones to form a protective barrier.

“Pffft, predictable.” N scoffed in amusement. “Slowmaka, use Sunny Day and follow up with Brick Break!”

The small hybrid Pokémon yawned loudly, as a bright sun appeared in the arena and melted all the hailstones, before the small Pokemon waddled at surprisingly fast speeds and used it’s thick tail to smack Ninetales’ head, causing it to stagger back a few feet as its wonderous wall was shattered instantly. Then in a surprise follow-up attack, Slomaka cloaked its body in fire and launched a sun-boosted Flare Blitz at Ninetales, sending it flying back into the wall and knocking it out cold as the Slomaka staggered back a few feet in pain from the recoil.

“M-My goodness!” Melia gasped, as she saw Alice run over to her friend and comfort it. “It got knocked out just like that?”

I’d throw in a bit more commentary, but these battles are basic, boring shit that any five-year-old can write. Why couldn’t they be like the ones in his Rejuv fic; they were alright at the very least.

“This is not looking good for us all…” Garret muttered. “And that’s just the power of their basic stages. Imagine how powerful the evolved ones are.”

“Not bad N, I gotta say that these fusions are pretty sweet. But are they a match for my ace Pokemon?” Alice smirked, as she sent out her Absol and brought out her Mega Ring, pressing the button on it as her companion soon Mega evolved.

“Well if you’re gonna use a Mega Evolution, then perhaps I should switch my Slomaka for my Mariblitz.” N calmly replied, as he recalled his friend and sent out his third Pokémon. It had the face and coloration of a Blitzle, and the body of a Marill. “Don’t let her cute appearances fool you, she packs quite the punch.”

No kidding, but I wish you chose Drilltrio as your last choice. That fellow was an absolute monster in battle, despite its pre-evo’s hilarious design.

“We’ll see about that; Absol use Night Slash!” Alice called out as her Mega-Absol ducked into the shadows and waited for an opportunity to strike. When the time was right, it lunged out of the shadows and slashed hard at the hybrid, catching it by surprise as it was sent back a few feet. The attack did a decent bit of damage despite being resisted by Mariblitz. “Nice! Now follow up with Play Rough!”

“Hmph, perhaps it is our duty to show you a real Play Rough, right Mariblitz?” N replied, as his companion nodded in approval and charged directly at the Mega-Absol. Both Pokemon played with each out viciously, using punches and kicks to gain an edge over their opponent. However a sudden surge of energy coursed through the Mariblitz as it delivered a powerful blow that sent Mega-Absol flying back, as it soon devolved into its base form and was no longer able to battle. This had surprised everyone in the arena, sans the Plasma Tech rperesentatives.

Didn’t surprise me; what better way to showcase someone’s power than having a major protagonist job to the guy? Eh, at least I can buy N’s prowess; Tressa still owes me her exam paper.

“A-Absol is no longer able to battle; with three of her Pokémon knocked out, Alice has lost the battle. The winner is N Harmonia from Plasma Tech!” Astolfo declared, as Alice and N congratulated their Pokémon before recalling them.

“Well I guess you won that battle. Congrats N…” Alice replied, her voice filled with a hint of sadness due to getting swept easily by the young man.

“So I guess the alliance is happening?” N inquired.

“Since you clearly proved the power of Pokémon Fusions, it’ll be wise for us to partner up with each other.” Ame admitted.

“Wonderful! I’ll finalise the paperwork in the meeting room. Come, Ame, let us toast to a prospective future together!” Ghetsis cheered, as Astolfo could’ve sworn he saw what looked like a faint smirk on his face but brushed it off as a trick of the eye.

You’ve been the most suspicious person of the group, yet you ignored a telltale sign that Ghetsis is conjuring up a scheme. For shame Astolfo, for shame…

“Alright then.” Ame replied as she soon turned to face her comrades. “You’re free to continue what you were doing before. We’ll be finalising our deal in my office.” She continued as she and Ghetsis left the arena, with Alice and N following closely behind them.

I apologise for the slightly shorter chapter, but the next one will more than make up for it. It’ll feature the glorious debut of another high roller in the Divine Powers, or so you think. Either way, it’s gonna be a blast to write about and I hope you’ll enjoy it as much as I will.

Oh joy, another random villain’s gonna act all chummy to Krishna, just what we needed. Well this is gonna be somewhat interesting, who’d you think will debut next? And no looking up the fic itself to cheat…

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Dawn Brigade:
Micaiah
Sothe
Nolan
Edward
Leonardo
Laura
Aran
Ilyana
Meg
Pelleas (not an actual member, but is a close associate of them)

Pokemon Fangame Community/Starlight Studios:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin reclaimed)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Laura (Not associated with the Fire Emblem Laura)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna/Nostra (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Noel/Nomos
Radomus
Corey
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Venam
Saki
Amber
Aelita
Nim
Erin
Crescent
Maria/Mariannette
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Richard
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The MS Loyalist Army:
General Nikita
Perche
Ami
Ulala

Allies:
Sanaki
Sephrian
Oliver
Clover
Light
Akame
Kurome
Fujiwara
Skins

The Forces of Heaven:
Merkabah/Jonathan
Gaston

The Forces of Hell:
Lucifer/Walter

Plasma Tech:
Ghetsis Harmonia
N/Natural Harmonia Gropius
Anthea
Concordia

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Tressa Colzione/The Matriarch
Ophilia Clement
Cyrus Albright
Olberic Eisenberg
Primrose Azelhart
Alfyn Greengrass
Therion
H’aanit
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa (Defeated)
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Flamvell Dilly (Defeated)
Maximillion Pegasus
Varis
Specter
Lekain (K.I.A)
Hetzel (K.I.A)
Valtome (K.I.A)
Numida (K.I.A)
Jarod (K.I.A)
Tayama
General Wolfgang (K.I.A)
Big Smoke
Ryder
Niko Bellic
Roman Bellic
Johnny Klebitz
Mario (CEO of Nintendo)
Gentarou Hongou
Nagisa Nijisaki
Teruaki Kubota
Kagechika Musashidou
Dio (Zero Escape: VLR)
Senator Armstrong
Admiral Greyfield
Caesar (Ride to Hell)
Yasuke Matsuda
Yuuto Akimaya

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake (P.O.W)
Cal (P.O.W)
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick (K.I.A)
Professor Gobline
Radius (K.I.A)
Redi
Sam (K.I.A)
Elia (K.I.A)
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan (K.I.A)

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Izabella
Aisha
HMT (P.O.W)
Beecham (K.I.A)
Aswang (K.I.A)
Agalia (K.I.A)
Arsinoe (K.I.A)
Halle (K.I.A)
Mahiru (K.I.A)
Chunyan (K.I.A)
Molly (K.I.A)
Ichima (K.I.A)
Louise (K.I.A)
Gisee (K.I.A)
Emma (K.I.A)
Franke (K.I.A)
Teresa (K.I.A)
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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Re: Yugioh: The Divine Conspiracy

Post by GorillaGamer » Fri Apr 19, 2019 11:27 pm

Well isn’t this a surprise; we’ve now got Batman in this clusterfuck of a fic, more specifically his rogues gallery. I’ll come forward and say that I only know bits and pieces about the franchise, but it doesn’t take a super genius to realize that this chapter will offend anyone and everyone who holds the Dark Knight dear to them, which I’m sure covers several people following this mock. Let’s just get this out of the way so that the pain will end sooner.

Welcome to Chapter 29, I am your benevolent author and boy do I have a treat for you all today. This chapter will debut the introduction of the Arkham franchise into the story as several of Batman’s greatest foes stage an escape out of the asylum and seek to cause chaos throughout the world, using the Divine Powers to cover the blame for their actions. It’s going to be one hell of a ride, and I hope my research shows itself in this chapter.

Now this is fucking rich; the author doing research on something that isn’t a Pokémon fangame. Next you’ll tell me that you’re the Prime Minister of England.

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters in this fic. They’re the property of their respective creators.

Note: Any made-up cards/skills will be underlined and will get their effects explained in their introductory chapters.


Chapter 28: Escape from Arkham Asylum!

Arkham Asylum

It’s fitting that we’re starting off in Arkham Asylum, considering that by the end of this, one of us will wind up in a mental institution.

Arkham Asylum; the most secure prison in the world. It was designed for two key purposes, to protect Gotham City from dangerous criminals, and to offer said criminals some rehabilitation and the chance to fix their mental state. Over time the facility started hosting some of the worlds most dangerous supervillains, who were sent there by the hand of the masked vigilante known as Batman. These super villains weren’t the type to quit, and have broken out of the facility multiple times, only to get thrown back in there sooner or later.

It's like Groundhog Day, but with mentally unstable criminals.

However, tonight was a different night; the facilities most infamous inmate, a psychotic, killer clown known as the Joker had been planning a dramatic escape, intrigued by the idea of using the Divine Powers to cause chaos and anarchy throughout the world. The self-titled Clown Prince of Crime caught a lucky break when he was able to get a two-way radio smuggled into the cell of his assistant, Harley Quinn, who was able to contact the Joker’s personal army of thugs to deliver needed equipment via secret passageways and staged imprisonments. Another beneficial factor was that he was able to foster a temporary alliance with Two-Face and the Penguin so that their own legions of thugs can initiate a riot and enable the super villains to escape.

Never mind that all three sides hate each other’s guts and went to war in Arkham City, the power of smol merchant girls convinced them to act all buddy-buddy.

All his months’ worth of preparations was going to be defined by the very next moment, as a guard was wandering closer and closer to his cell.

“H-Help…I’m dying over here!” He mock-shouted, hoping the guard would take noticed and enter his cell. And like a fool waiting for the punchline, the guard unlocked the cell door and entered it, only to take a bat upside his head and crumple to the floor.

You’d think the asylum staff would be used to shit like this, but I guess it was this guy’s first day on the job.

“Tada! How’d you like that?” Harley mocked the fallen guard, picking up a keycard that was attached to the belt and twirled it in her hands. “Ready for the show to begin, Mister J?”

“Of course! The show can’t go on without the main character!” the Joker boldly announced, whipping out a remote from his coat and pressing the button, causing the facility’s security to get compromised and unlock all the cell doors, enabling all the imprisoned thugs to cause chaos. The duo of criminal clowns proceeded to walk down the halls, basking in the chaos they caused as the guards and thugs fought each other over dominance of the facility.

I’m sure the guards will be fine, as long as the thugs don’t get their hands on stun batons.

A guard spotted the duo and charged at them, only to get knocked out by a swing from Harley’s bat.

“Well this is interesting, I thought I was the only one smart enough to capitalise on the opportunity to get out of here.” A bespectacled man in a green suit commented as he spotted the two clowns. “It is to be expected that this Divine Powers, or whatever they call themselves, would be enamoured by my genius.

Despite that pitiful, pitiful description, I think we can all tell that this chump’s supposed to be the Riddler. The sad thing is that this is the most description any of the villain’s get in this chapter; guess that’s what happens when you’re not a fangame tug-shot target.

“Oh, now that’s not on! You don’t try and spoil the joke before I tell you the punchline!” the Joker mock-complained, before he started cackling like crazy. “No wonder nobody tells a joke to you, Riddles.”

“Please, I don’t deal in petty jokes; I only deal the most puzzling riddles that the human mind is able to comprehend.” The Riddler commented off-handed. “That said, all the other supervillains are having a field day with the simpletons that are guarding the place. Foolish, I know, but it allowed me to get this far so I suppose I should give them that.”

“Whatever.” Harley ignored his narcissistic boasts. “You breaking out with us, or not?”

“I suppose I’ll tag along, for now…” the Riddler sighed to himself, as he decided to follow the clowns out of the treacherous facility. A few guards caught up to the trio and aimed their guns at them, only for the Joker to whip out a few of his walking teeth and threw them towards the guards. The teeth cackled as they waddled up to the confused guards, who lowered their guns and aimed them at the teeth, only for the teeth to explode and release knockout gas in the guards faces, causing them to collapse into the worlds of dreams.

If the guards here are this stupid as to keep their eyes off the highly dangerous criminals, then it’s no wonder they escape all the time.

The sounds of cheering could be heard in the adjacent room, with the trio entering it to see a “trial” being hosted by Two-Face, as a couple other super villains watched eagerly in the stands, and an army of thugs was cheering loudly at the judgement of the captured guards.

“The time for justice is upon us; these guards have been abusing their power to experiment on us and deal unjust punishments, even going so far as to hurl abuse at me and my wife. Well I say enough is enough!” Two-Face boldly declared, frightening the guards as he brought out his trusty coin. “I shall let the coin determine your fate…”

Well I guess we have the time for a quick tri—hold up, Two-Face got hitched in this universe?! Perhaps he’s displeased with the asylum staff for not giving him a wedding gift.

The “courtroom” watched with bated breath as Two-Face flipped the coin in the air and palmed it, placing it over his hand and removing his clenched fist, revealing it to have landed burnt-side up. “Game over, piggies.” Two-Face hissed ominously to the guards as he soon eyed up the attending super villains. “Now how shall I execute you? Crushed to death by Bane? Turned into icicles by Mr. Freeze? Or should I get Penguin to feed you to his—”

“Ooh, Ooh! Let me slice the little piggies up, I’ve got some spare room on my arm…” Mr. Zsasz whispered loudly in a maniacal way, his hand gripping a blood-stained steak knife.

Nice to see that imprisonment hasn’t kept him from fulfilling his stab-happy wishes. Good on you, ya crazy bastard.

“Let me crush ‘em! I’ll make them pay!” Clayface chimed in, as he created a small squad of clay warriors who all flexed their arms.

“Now, now, all of you will get your—” Two-Face began, before the back wall crumbled as a massive figure grabbed one of the guards and yanked him from his chain, before proceeding to devour him in a most vicious manner, sending blood and chunks of flesh everywhere.

“Haa…I still hunger…” Killer Croc hissed, eyeing up the other guards who were frightened out of their minds.

An accurate representation of the confrontation in the Arkham Sewers, if I say so myself.

“Hey, save some piggies for us—” a thug requested, only for Killer Croc to growl at the thug, who shivered in fright, before throwing his hands up in surrender. “O-Ok then, y-you can have them all…”

Killer Croc eyed up the rest of the guards momentarily before snatching them off the chains and began chowing down on them, slathering the nearby walls with blood as the supervillains watched on in awe.

I’d tell him not to be a messy eater, but I’m not comfortable criticizing the table manners of a gigantic, half-human, half-crocodile man.

“Crikey! And I thought my shark was a messy eater.” The Penguin joked to the other villains, who all chuckled at the quip, only to get distracted by the sound of slow clapping.

“Marvellous show you put on there, Harvey.” The Joker complimented, walking up to his partner in crime. “Your thugs are putting on quite the show back in the Holding Cells, now what’s say we get a move on and ditch this joint?”

“Not yet, I must punish more of these swine for insulting my wife.” Two-Face declared, as he proceeded to pick up a dakimakura that depicted Haruhi Suzumiya posing playfully in a black bunnysuit/stockings combination. “Don’t worry, I’ll make them all pay for insulting out love…” he spoke to the pillow.

I can’t breathe! I can’t fucking breathe! Of all the most asinine, out of place shit I’ve seen so far, this takes the cake. This nutjob of an author turned Two-Face into some pillow-hugging otaku, and had him marry a character that has nothing to do with any of this shit! I could spend the next hour laughing at this shit, but that wouldn’t provide an entertaining mock now, would it?

“Awwwwww, they look so cute! Just like us, right Mister J?” Harley commented, eyeing up her boss intensely.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. We’ve got an asylum to bust out of.” The Joker brushed her question aside, as he led his growing legion of supervillains one step closer to freedom. However, they were soon halted by a small squadron of guards, armed to the teeth with high tech assault rifles. “Well I gotta say; you’re either brave, or foolish if you think you can take us all on at the same time. Shall I tell you all a most humorous joke? Knock-Knock, you’re dead!”

“R-Return to your cells this inst—” one of the guards began, before getting his brains blown out by a rifle shot. The other guards turned around and started shooting wildly into the room, only to get picked off one by one by the mystery assailants. Soon enough, they all lay dead in a messy pile of bloodied bodies, as five more supervillains soon joined the fray.

“OK then, let me see if you’re all on Mister J’s party list!” Harley chimed, retrieving a hastily written list from underneath her outfit and began checking it thoroughly. “Let’s see here; there’s Deathstroke, Deadshot, Firefly, Shiva, and the Electrocutioner. Yep, you’re all on the list!”

“All as one-note and description-less as the list said you’d be.”

“Heh, it’s obvious why you would want a powerful bounty hunter like me at your party!” the Electrocutioner bragged, flexing his arms as another legion of guards swarmed into the room and aimed their weapons at the bounty hunters.

“Well go on then, prove to us that you’re worthy of joining this “party” that a genius like I was worthy enough to join.” The Riddler goaded the group of five, as the bounty hunters charged at the guards and began their deadly assault. Deadshot scrambled up to higher ground and took aim at the sniper guards on the higher levels, picking them off one by one with his trusty rifle. The perforated guards slumped over the railings and began hurtling towards the ground, causing the guards on the ground to turn their backs, enabling Deathstroke to slice them up into finely cut chunks of meat.

I hope he doesn’t get any blood on Haru—Hahahahahaha!

Ah, my bad. I’ll try and retain my composure next time.


Meanwhile, a few guards had circled Shiva and brought out their stun batons; yet the display barely fazed the experienced woman, who launched a series of punches and kicks at blinding speeds, knocking the guards into the boxes that lined the steel walls, as Electrocutioner pummelled several more guards with his electricized knuckles, sending powerful shocks that caused the guards hearts to explode. It all ended as Firefly torched the remaining guards with his flamethrower, that shot flames so powerful that it reduced the guards to charred bodies in a few seconds. Several of the supervillains were impressed with how effortlessly the hostile guards were dealt with.

Well you’d hope that these expensive bounty hunters can do the job they were paid to do, otherwise I’d be asking for a refund.

“Too easy…” Deadshot scoffed as he reloaded his rifle. “When I bust outta this joint, the first thing I’m gonna do is hunt down some worthy prey. Hopefully I can get paid as well.”

“Well you’re in luck; our tour bus is going all over the world to put on a show for everybody, and there’s nothing the Bat can do about it!” the Joker cackled maniacally as the sound of guards running into the nearby room echoed throughout the halls. The cabal of villains checked the room and saw four of their companions stranded on top of a water tank as the swarm of guys eyed them up viciously.

“Well this ended up backfiring in our faces…” Maxie Zeus commented to the other three villains. “Should we throw the midget at them and run for our lives?”

“Me?! Why throw me to the wolves?!” Mad Hatter protested, before turning to his ally in desperation. “Can’t you sicc your army of rats onto ‘em?”

Better yet, why can’t you use your prowess in brainwashing technology to deal with these mooks?

“They’re all dead; murdered by them in cold blood!” The Ratcatcher rebutted. “And it’s not like I can go down there and fight them off; they’ve got guns!”

“I’m sick of waiting around here like a fool—what the?” Hush began but got distracted by the sounds of the guards firing like crazy and saw his comrades charging at the oppressive guards. Bane used his muscular frame to charge into the guards, knocking them off their feet before opting to pick on up and shattered his back over his knee. A few more guards tried to run away, only for one to get picked up by Killer Croc, who chowed down on the guard in an instant, sending more blood everywhere. Half a dozen more guards were frozen by Mr. Freeze’s powerful ice gun, with the Penguin perforating the statues with his umbrella gun that had a penguin cane-head. One of the guards attempted to flee to the nearby guard station to call for back up, but was stabbed viciously by Zsasz for his troubles, as a few more guards were pummelled to death by Clayface who made his fists into rocky hammers. Eventually the last of the guards was murdered, giving the distressed villains some breathing room as they hopped down from the water tank.

It says something about the author’s lack of talent when he can create a fight scene featuring several of Batman’s most infamous supervillains, and have it be as boring as watching paint dry.

“M-Mr. Joker! T-Thanks for saving us back there!” Mad Hatter thanked his savior.

“That’s Mister J, to you, and I’M the only one who can call him that!” Harley huffed haughtily.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s get on with it already. I saw Scarecrow and a few of the others fight off some more guards in the room down the hall, right where the cafeteria is.” Hush interjected the enthralling conversation.

“Oooh, Scarecrow’s putting on an act during MY show. Let’s see if the reviews for it are accurate.” The Joker cackled, leading his troupe through the now bloodied halls as they soon arrived at the cafeteria, where they saw Scarface and the Ventriloquist using a turned over table as cover, before firing wildly at the guards.

This is the most repetitive fucking shit in this damn fic; it’s nothing but the worn-out sequence of:

‘Villains fight off asylum guards. Guards die. Villains get recruited into the ever-growing gang. Gang goes to next room and sees new villains fighting off guards.’

Rinse and repeat.


“Take that you dirty little piggies! When I’m done with you, you’d wish you were sleeping with the fishes!” Scarface hissed ominously, his machine gun eviscerating the guards into nothing but bloody paste. Meanwhile, Killer Moth was providing covering fire by using his cocoon gun to ensnare the helpless guards in its sticky threads. However, a sickly green gas soon oozed its way into the room, with the villains putting masks over their faces to protect them from the noxious gas. The guards weren’t so lucky, and started shrieking in what could only be described as a deep, primal fear over what seems to be invisible spectres. They started struggling in an absolute frenzy, breaking out of their cocoons before clawing at their skin in a desperate attempt to swat away their fictitious assailants.

“That’s it…give into your fears…” an ominous voice echoed out through the room, as a figure leapt out of the darkness and pricked the terrified guards with his syringe gauntlet, finishing off the already weakened guards and leaving them for dead, there faces etched with a permeant shriek of terror. “Hahahaha! Now they realise the true power of fear, if only for a few seconds.” The Scarecrow chuckled out loud, as he soon noticed his partners for crime. “Sorry about the mess, but the guests wouldn’t…co-operate with us.”

Oof, that’s gonna hurt the overall review score.

“Forget about the mess, I’ll get some of the thugs to clean up this place. We’ve got bigger things to do, and I’m not letting some party poopers ruin my fun!” the Joker adamantly declared.

“W-Well you might wanna get a move on, as I saw a whole swarm of guards going after Black Mask and his group down by the warden’s office.” The Ventriloquist commented, as he gestured for the clique of supervillains to follow up to their destination. When they arrived there, they saw a whole swarm of guards surround Black Mask and his temporary companions; Prometheus, the Great White Shark and Calendar Man, though none of the villains were intimidated at all.

You see what I mean everyone? It’s nothing but the same scene, over and over and over again!

“Give up now, and we’ll be gentle with you…” one of the guards sneered evilly, aiming his shotgun at Black Mask.

“That’s my line, not that I’ll give you the offer to begin with.” Black Mask chuckled, before bringing out his dual handguns and fired at the crooked guards, sending spatters of blood everywhere and on the walls. Great White Shark whipped out his own assault rifle and provided covering fire, taking out a trio of snipers that had set their sights on the villains. A few of the guards on the lower levels had brought out their stun batons and charged at the villains, with Prometheus whipping out his metal staff and countered the guards, as Calendar Man picked off any stragglers with his machete.

“Ohohohoho! Did you forget that it’s Thanksgiving next week? Oh, the crimes I’ll commit will be wonderful!” Calendar Man taunted a dying guard, pulling the blood-soaked machete out of him, before plunging it into another guard, who gurgled on his own blood before dying.

“Like stealing a turkey for my dinner. What can I say, I have expensive taste.”

As this was happening, Great White Shark had finished sniping all the snipers, their bodies falling onto the ground and surprising the other guards, enabling Prometheus to strike them down with his physical prowess. The sole surviving guard attempted to call for reinforcements, but was brutally executed by Black Mask, who then turned to face the Joker. “I do hope we put on a satisfactory performance.”

“Most satisfactory indeed; it was a wise decision on my behalf to invite you all to my breakout party!” the Joker beamed proudly, before cackling once more.

“Yeah, what a party. Now if you’ll excuse me, this genius has a competition to win.” The Riddler interjected, making his way to the exit only to get halted by his allies.

Don’t stop Riddler, you’re a few feet away from exiting this shitheap for good!

“Woah there, what competition? The invite didn’t say anything about some competition.” Maxie Zeus inquired.

“It figures I’d have to inform the dullard about it…” the Riddler muttered under his breath. “Long story short, the al Ghul’s had challenged the inmates to see who can be the first to escape. Naturally, my intellect will lead me to victory!” with that said, he quickly bolted towards the exit and escaped the building, with the stunned villains starting blankly at each other before following the man out of the crazy-packed building. The villains had noticed that they were by the docks that the representative for the Divine Powers they talked suggested as a meeting place and noticed the Riddler standing before Ra’s al Ghul and his daughter, Talia.

Wha, were they recruited by Tressa already? Why did they set up a competition to see who could break out first? Why didn’t they help their supposed teammates in the escape effort? Why haven’t they already crushed the fangame studios with the immense power of the League of Assassins? Why have you got me questioning things other than Two-Face’s wife?!

“Looks like I was the first one out of this hellhole, now where is my prize?” the Riddler inquired.

“It seems that the so-called “smartest man in Arkham” wasn’t able to outwit his opponent and claim the prize…” was all Ra’s al Ghul commented, surprising the genius.

“B-But how?!” the Riddler stuttered, as he felt a familiar vine slither across his feet.

“Oh…don’t feel to bad. You did the best that you could, for a meat-sack at least.” Poison Ivy chuckled, as her vines tended to her whims.

This competition seems a little unfair when you consider that several of these villains have no special traits whatsoever, yet are up against calculating crime lords, super strong humans, and a lady who has total control over plant life.

“D-Do I get a consolation prize at least…?” the Riddler inquired.

“Nope. Professor Hugo Strange came her a few seconds after Ivy… as you can see, he’s playing with his new toy.” Talia al Ghul replied, as the bespectacled man spotted Strange polishing a Gold-Plated Uzi with a spare cloth.

“What a fine toy for me to hunt the Bat with.” Professor Strange eyed his new gun in awe.

Well a gold-plated gun is nice for a consolation prize, but we don’t even know what the main prize was. For all we know, it could be a mouldy old fortune cookie.

“Now all we need to do is—” he began, but was soon interrupted by the sound of a boat speeding towards the docks, knocking several police boats away. Once the boat stopped, a small but familiar young girl hopped off the boat and made her way to the gang of super villains.

“Welcome, welcome! I thank you all for coming to meet me at such a time. I know you’re all busy escaping this place and beginning your next crime spree, but I wanna let you know that your service is greatly appreciated.” Tressa greeted all the super villains.

I like how she’s talking to these highly dangerous criminals as if they were her old high school friends.

“Is that the legendary Tressa I’ve heard about? The person who has the strength of ten Batmans?” Clayface asked the group, who began muttering amongst one another until the asylum spotlights shone upon them as a massive swarm of asylum guards aimed their weapons at the villains.

“You’re all under arrest for attempted escape of the asylum. Surrender now or get gunned down!” The leader of the group demanded.

“What’s the matter Boles, was I not funny enough for you?” the Joker inquired, mocking the security guard.

Huh? Who’s this dude? Give me a moment…

Apparently, he was some corrupt guard who assisted Harley and Joker in taking over the asylum during Arkham Asylum, but quickly outlived his usefulness.


“You fell right into my trap; I only let you bozos run free so I can recapture you and become the warden as a reward for my effort.” Boles chuckled evilly. “Oh, and this is a surprising turn of events, imagine the reward I’ll get for bagging the little girl.”

“Pffft, like you and your legion of weaklings is a match for me.” Tressa boasted. “I can take you all on by myself.”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! If that’s how you wanna play, then I’m happy to indulge you!” Boles sneered, as several guards made their way towards her.

“Allow me to show you why my name sends shivers down the spine of hardened criminals.” Tressa smirked, gesturing for the super villains to watch her performance.

And I thought ego-stroking showdowns were reserved for the main protagonists. Guess I learnt something new today.

The guards proceeded to charge at her, as she whipped out several freeze bombs and threw them at the guards, immobilizing them as she started picking them off easily with her elegantly-crafted sword, sending bits of flesh and bone everywhere. This angered Boles, as he ordered some more guards to fire at her, only for Tressa to dodge the incoming bulletstorm and threw a few shurikens at the enemies, slashing their throats and causing them to drown in their own blood.

“Oh man, this girl’s crazy! How can we—w-where’d she go?!” A guard exclaimed in fear, as she had disappeared from their line of sight.

“Well what are you waiting for, find her already!” Boles demanded, as the guards nodded and began searching for their troublesome foe. However they were having no luck in their search, despite looking all over the place. The silence was soon interrupted by a blood-curdling scream, as Tressa lunged from her hiding spot and slaughtered the nearby guards. The survivors attempted to gun her down, but their fear caused them to miss their mark, enabling the young girl to cut them all down with ease, leaving Boles on his own.

Look I’m not all that familiar with Octopath Traveller, but if Tressa is as powerful in that game as she is here, then I expect it to be an utter cakewalk.

“S-Stay back! Y-You don’t have to do this!” He begged for mercy, raising his hands in defeat.

“You’re right, I don’t have to do it. But I want to.” Tressa smirked, as she punched his gut and effortlessly broke his neck, killing the treacherous guard. She started to walk over to the villains, who were impressed with her battle prowess, when she was soon interrupted by Batman arriving at the scene.

Evidently Batman’s superpower is appearing right out of nowhere when the plot demanded him to.

“You aren’t leaving this asylum, turn back to your cells, now!” Batman demanded, glaring at the super villains before turning his gaze to Tressa. “You on the other hand, will turn yourself in, this instant!”

“Pffft, like I’ll take orders from a talking rodent!” Tressa retorted coolly, as Batman narrowed his eyes at her.

“I’m warning you; I’m not afraid to use physical force if I have to.” Batman barked at her, with Tressa cracking her knuckles in response.

“And I’m not afraid to take you on; come at me.” Tressa beckoned, taunting the older man with a hand gesture.

Place your bets folk, who will win this climactic showdown? The Caper Crusader, or the Merchant Queen?

The caped crusader roared to psyche himself up and charged at her, with Tressa dodging the attack and tripping him over and delivered a few punches to Batman’s back. The older man managed to roll out of the way and deliver a twin kick to her, knocking her back a few feet, though she was able to recover quickly and deliver a swift kick to his jaw, cracking it effortlessly. “Is that the best you can do?” The young girl taunted.

Anger coursed through Batman’s body, as he charged at her once more, attempting to knock her down, only for the small girl to nimbly dodge the attack and tripped him once more, as she started pummelling his chest with a barrage of powerful punches, shattering several of his ribs. The weakened Batman pushed her away and managed to get up, as he attempted to charge at her once more, only for Tressa to whip out a revolver and fire it twice, shattering both kneecaps as the beefy man roared in pain and collapsed to the ground.

Really, is this the best you could do with the Dark Knight? Because he acted no differently from any random thug the Joker employs.

The villains were awestruck at how easily their nemesis fell to Tressa, leading them to believe that siding with her was the right thing to do. Tressa waltzed over to Batman and hoisted him to his knees, holding the revolver to his temple as several police cars arrived at the scene, officers pouring out of them as they aimed their pistols at the young girl.

“Tressa Colzione, you are under arrest for assisting dangerous criminals, acts of terrorism and many more charges. Surrender now or face the consequences.” One of the officers called out, as Tressa laughed at him.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t the oh-so-mighty Commissioner Gordon; I’m surprised, you managed to amass the courage to come face me.” Tressa chuckled darkly, pressing the revolver barrel against Batman’s temple. The caped crusader was frightened out of his wits and was tearing up in complete fear, something which has never happened before. Scarecrow was rather impressed with how easily Tressa installed fear into his nemesis.

Oh, come on now Tressa, no need to traumatize the random thug you shot up.

“There’s no need to get violent and start shooting the hostages. This can end peacefully!” Gordon attempted to get her to see reason, but she knocked it back coldly.

“Peacefully? I aim to create a new universe, and the people I’ve recruited will help me attain my dream. Get in my way, and I’ll make you and you family suffer!” Tressa warned the old man, as she glared at Batman momentarily, before turning back to the police officers. “You can have your broken hero, your Batman. Or should I say, Bruce Wayne…” The young girl delivered a powerful punch to Batman’s back, shattering it before she quickly bolted onto the boat and managed to escape with all the supervillains, as the police were flabbergasted upon hearing who the Dark Knight really was. As the boat disappeared into the night, the police had their morale drop to the lowest in a long time; the young girl they just saw did more damage to Batman in 15 minutes, than his entire rogues gallery did in their entire lifetime.

Bullshit, fucking bullshit! I don’t get angry at fanfics as much as I used to, but this is flat out insulting. You just shat all over the Batman franchise by not only turning the man himself into a complete joke, but having all his most recognisable villains turned into utter imbeciles, but virtue of having their efforts rendered pointless by Tressa randomly showing up and shooting Batman before revealing his secret identity to the world. How she even knows this is unknown, but I bet the author endowed it onto her, because he’s crushing on her far more than he is with SERRA, and that’s saying something. Fuck you and the Tressa-obsessed horse you rode on!

0000

The villains were all seated around a large table that had a holographic generator in the middle, wondering why they had been recruited in the first place. Professor Strange was greatly satisfied that Batman was exposed as the false hero that he was, while the Riddler was mentally kicking himself for not realising his identity earlier.

“Thank you all for coming, I bet you’re all wondering why I rescued you tonight. Putting it simply, I need your services, and I’m willing to pay you handsomely for your efforts.” Tressa began.

“Define handsomely for me, I’m not just some cheap crook you can find prowling the streets.” Deathstroke inquired, as Tressa turned on the holographic generator on the table, as it showed what looked like a briefcase full of storage devices.

“This is a suitcase filled with the original copies of the fangames that the Divine Powers has been trying to destroy. If I can get my hands on them, I can create my own version after the flawed version has been removed from stores. We believe they’re located at the main headquarters of Starlight Studios, but we have no idea where it is. As this is an important mission, I am willing to pay $100 million to whoever can deliver the suitcase to me, undamaged.” Tressa explained, with Big Smoke showing off the suitcases full of money, as the villains started murmuring amongst each other.

This doesn’t make a lick of sense; for what reason would Starlight Studios cut content from the newer versions of the games, yet keep the inferior, outdated versions locked up? I’d question why Tressa wants to create her own fangames, considering that she’s part of an anti-fangame cult, but a later chapter has what could possibly be the most nonsensical asspull of this fic.

“$100 million for some video games? This is the easiest paycheck I’ve ever seen!” the Penguin chuckled heartily, thinking about what he’s gonna buy with the money.

“However, they must be the original copies in the hard-drives, and not a store-bought copy ported onto them. The originals have lots of content that isn’t present in the retail copies; I should know, I worked on these games before I got fired.” Tressa continued, having ironed out a possible exploit. “So, don’t think you can try and cheat me, or you’ll end up like the Bat!”

“Are alliances allowed in this little game of yours?” Two-Face inquired, holding onto his “wife” tightly.

“Alliances are allowed, but you’ll have to split the money up if that is the case.” Tressa answered. “Just try not to get too violent, I just got the carpet cleaned up back at the temple. As a matter of fact, why don’t I take you there? I’ve got a prisoner I need to interrogate.”

The villains began starting at each other, suspicions forming in their mind as to who can and cannot be trusted. One thing’s for sure; this’ll be their most interesting crime spree in a long time.

If by interesting, you mean ‘have the villains mindlessly spout soapboxy opinions while playing card games’, then yes you’re right.

Holy fuck, this chapter really was something else. On top of desecrating all that is Batman, it proved to be an exercise in sheer boredom, on account of the repetitive nature of this chapter. And it seems that things won’t be looking up, as we’re promised a lemon in the upcoming chapter; I pity whatever fangame character has to go through that embarrassment.

One more thing, despite this being a Batman-oriented chapter, I can’t say I’m all that thrilled with the villain list. Yes, we do get some of his most famous/powerful villains, but I do wish we got some of the more legendary villains he’s come up against. I mean for fuck’s sake, where’s Boss Biggis?!


Done and done! What a chapter I wrote; especially with how masterfully I incorporated Batman’s rogues gallery into it. I know some people might get upset over how easily Batman was defeated, but I wanted to express just how powerful Tressa is. Anyway, the next chapter will feature another showdown against the MS Waifu Army, and even a lemon to spice things up, so you know it’s gonna be good. Catch you later, everyone!

Astolfo’s group:
Astolfo
Roland
Chevalier D’eon
Boudica
Blair Flannigan
Micaiah
Sothe
Jack Frost

Dawn Brigade:
Micaiah
Sothe
Nolan
Edward
Leonardo
Laura
Aran
Ilyana
Meg
Pelleas (not an actual member, but is a close associate of them)

Pokemon Fangame Community/Starlight Studios:
Ame (W.I.A)
Cain
Aya (Pearl Hairpin reclaimed)
Hardy (Reborn)
Titania
Amaria (Sapphire Bracelet stolen)
Julia
Alice
Charlotte (Diamond Earring stolen)
Laura (Not associated with the Fire Emblem Laura)
Saphira
Luna (Emerald Brooch stolen)
Serra
Bennett
Adrienn
Anna/Nostra (Amethyst Pendant stolen)
Noel/Nomos
Radomus
Corey
Heather (Ruby Ring stolen)
Shelly
Dr. Connal
Melia
Venam
Saki
Amber
Aelita
Nim
Erin
Crescent
Maria/Mariannette
Valerie
Scarlett
Shiv
Aurora
Garret
Richard
Rosetta
Hardy (Desolation) (K.I.A)
Amelia
Nora

The MS Loyalist Army:
General Nikita
Perche
Ami
Ulala

Allies:
Sanaki
Sephrian
Oliver
Clover
Light
Akame
Kurome
Fujiwara
Skins

The Forces of Heaven:
Merkabah/Jonathan
Gaston

The Forces of Hell:
Lucifer/Walter

Plasma Tech:
Ghetsis Harmonia
N/Natural Harmonia Gropius
Anthea
Concordia

The Divine Powers:
Krishna
Odin
Maitreya
Shesha
Damien (Defected from fangame community)
Tressa Colzione/The Matriarch
Ophilia Clement
Cyrus Albright
Olberic Eisenberg
Primrose Azelhart
Alfyn Greengrass
Therion
H’aanit
Dagda (?)
Zhong Kui
Medusa (Defeated)
Loki
Quetzalcoatl
Seth
Baal
Missy (Defeated)
Harold (Defeated)
Bandit Keith (Defeated)
Flamvell Dilly (Defeated)
Maximillion Pegasus
Varis
Specter
Lekain (K.I.A)
Hetzel (K.I.A)
Valtome (K.I.A)
Numida (K.I.A)
Jarod (K.I.A)
Tayama
The Joker
Harley Quinn
The Riddler
Two-Face
Bane
Mr. Freeze
The Penguin
Mr. Zsasz
Clayface
Killer Croc
Deathstroke
Deadshot
Firefly
The Electrocutioner
Shiva
Maxie Zeus
The Mad Hatter
The Ratcatcher
Hush
Scarface
The Ventriloquist
Killer Moth
Scarecrow
Black Mask
Prometheus
The Great White Shark
The Calendar Man
Ra’s al Ghul
Talia al Ghul
Poison Ivy
Professor Strange
General Wolfgang (K.I.A)
Big Smoke
Ryder
Niko Bellic
Roman Bellic
Johnny Klebitz
Mario (CEO of Nintendo)
Gentarou Hongou
Nagisa Nijisaki
Teruaki Kubota
Kagechika Musashidou
Dio (Zero Escape: VLR)
Senator Armstrong
Admiral Greyfield
Caesar (Ride to Hell)
Yasuke Matsuda
Yuuto Akimaya

The Traitors:
Jaern
Zenith
Professor Maple
Lin
Sirius
Blake (P.O.W)
Cal (P.O.W)
Fern
Madame X
Nastasia
Madelis
Neved
Geara
Ren
Professor Larkspur
Rick (K.I.A)
Professor Gobline
Radius (K.I.A)
Redi
Sam (K.I.A)
Elia (K.I.A)
Lavius
Lavia
Baron
Connor
Texan (K.I.A)

The Waifu Army:
Elysion
Alma
Amber
Izabella
Aisha
HMT (P.O.W)
Beecham (K.I.A)
Aswang (K.I.A)
Agalia (K.I.A)
Arsinoe (K.I.A)
Halle (K.I.A)
Mahiru (K.I.A)
Chunyan (K.I.A)
Molly (K.I.A)
Ichima (K.I.A)
Louise (K.I.A)
Gisee (K.I.A)
Emma (K.I.A)
Franke (K.I.A)
Teresa (K.I.A)
Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?
A quote from Project AFTER
Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.
A quote from Andrew himself

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